Wholly Made Life™- ReClaim your Whole Life, Tap into God-Sized Fulfillment for the Success Driven Woman, Mama, Wife, Sister

EP 21 3 Ways to Leave a Legacy of Love, Service, Value- Something My Kids Are Proud to Share (And They will Call me Blessed) What Will They Say about Me in My Obituary? Servant leadership at home

EP 21 3 Ways to Leave a Legacy of Love, Service, Value- Something My Kids Are Proud to Share (And They will Call me Blessed) What Will They Say about Me in My Obituary? Servant leadership at home

Are you Leaving a Legacy? Attending 2 funerals this week and reflecting on a traumatic loss in my family over the last few months, it has me reflecting on what kind of legacy they left, and what kind of legacy I am leaving for my kids, husband, friends, co-workers, in my life. What would they say about me in my obituary? Would I be blessed enough to have the nice words read out loud about me as the things I heard today in a beautiful homegoing celebration, or in the thousands of posts on a fb page of a family member we tragically lost?

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Are you Leaving a Legacy? 3 Ways to Leave a Legacy- Love hard, Serve Others with a Servant Heart, and Give Value- Let others know they matter. Let them know they are loved. Attending 2 funerals this week and reflecting on a traumatic loss in my family over the last few months, it has me reflecting on what kind of legacy they left, and what kind of legacy I am leaving for my kids, husband, friends, co-workers, in my life. What would they say about me in my obituary? Would I be blessed enough to have the nice words read out loud about me as the things I heard today in a beautiful homegoing celebration, or in the thousands of posts on a fb page of a family member we tragically lost?

As long as we have breath, we have an opportunity to make a difference; show others how important they are to us and to the world. Serve others, pay it forward. Show kindness. 

What a beautiful tribute reflection on the lives of close loved ones we have lost. There is redemption, salvation, grace, mercy, and love. I was honored to have shared these moments with a friend. 

Share your story of your loved one's legacy: https://bit.ly/whollymadelifefbgroup

Email: atoninirogers@gmail.com

 

 

EP 20 Change your Life by Doing this Daily for Busy Working Mom. Morning Routine Professional Working Woman- Pray-Dry Brush-Happiness Essential Oil-Green Smoothie

EP 20: Change your Life by Doing this Daily for the Busy Working Mom. Morning Routine for the Professional Working Woman- Pray-Dry Brush-Happiness Essential Oil-Green Smoothie

Get a daily routine that hits several pieces of your pie. Here’s mine.

1. Pray (Prepares me for the spiritual warfare I may face for that day)
2. Biblical Affirmations: Repeat words that I know God said about me
3. Dry Brush with Happiness Essential Oil (awakens, activates, detoxifies, smooths skin)
4. Green Smoothie

Links for this episode:

Need a dry brush? Here’s a great one here: DRY BRUSH

Happiness Essential Oil

Facebook Community (Wholly Made Life FB group)

Welcome back sister today is episode 20! So we're going to talk today about personal and self care, but before we get started, I wanted to you give a thank you and a challenge. So I wanted to, I read a couple of reviews because I am having a small giveaway content to get to a hundred ratings, a hundred reviews. And just as a reminder, the way Apple podcasts works is that in order for the podcast to be seen by other women, when they are searching for podcasts, resonate to resonate with, in order for it to show up in the search, the ratings and the reviews, the more that you have, the better chance we get to show up in searches. So that's why reviews and ratings are so important. I am so grateful for those of you guys who have taken time to give the ratings and the reviews.

And of course, I hope for five stars and a written review, if you're not able to give five stars, if you could email me instead, and let me know what feedback you have, because I want to hear the feedback. If it's not a five stars, I want to be able to correct it so that you can give me five stars. So email me at angietoninirogers@gmail.com. If you have some feedback that in order for you to give me five stars, I would need to do on the podcast, because I'm definitely here for it. I'm here for that feedback. But I also want the podcast to be able to be found so that we can create this community of women that we can help each other with and live life together. And the great way to do that, like I said, is to have five star reviews with written reviews.

So I wanted to read a couple of reviews, Ellie C., , the Spanglish  “encouraging, thank you for the beautiful reminder that we are fearfully and wonderfully made and the encouragement to get all that God has for me. I will have the whole pie”. Well, amen sister. I pray that for you as well.

Okay. The next one is Tammi L I think, and it says “living my whole life. Angie has a way about her. That is so encouraging. I can't wait to start to live my whole life. Holy made so awesome”. And that was a five star review.

So thank you so much what my challenge, but a little giveaway is we’re trying to get to a 100 reviews and ratings. I will be giving away one of my favorite things. One of the favorite products that I use, and I will drop that into the mail as soon as we're able to hit that hundred, write a review.

So if you do a review or rating, of course, I will have that there. I would encourage you to sign your name at the bottom so that I know how to find you otherwise. It just shows up as the, your Apple login. And sometimes that's not always indicative of who it is, leaving the review, sign, your name. And the second thing you can do is tag an episode or tag your review that you wrote, like screenshot it and then put it up in your Insta or Facebook stories and tag me so that I can keep of the review that you've done so that you can get into the drawing to win the giveaway. Okay. So I thought that might be fun.

All right. So today we are going to get into personal care. So I don't know about you, but I used to, when I thought about personal self-care, I used to think about, you know, going to the spa and getting a massage and taking a girls trip or a trip by yourself or things like that.

I have now realized that it's really more about the small everyday things you can do to take care of yourself. There are so many things that we can do in personal. Self-care really hits all the pieces of our pie. If you think about it, it hits the physical, the emotional or psychosocial, it hits the spiritual, your personal interests. It hits your space like your environment, where you live your home and financial and work. So there's ways to take care of yourself in all of those areas. And I just want to touch on a few of those areas, because like I said, if you're like me, then you may think of self care is something huge. Like you have to take, you know, a spa vacation or something like that. Now, if you listened to my last episode, episode 19, you'll know that physical touch is absolutely not my love language.

I mean, it's there. And speaking of love languages, you can kind of have some in all, like, you're not probably going to score zero in any one of those love languages, but physical touch is just a very low one for me, because I don't need that. I don't receive love that way. It's just not something that lights me up. It just is what it is bummer. Right. But I found ways to make an important, what I was going to say is when I think about a massage or massage or something like that, I cringe. I know there are so many people that love massages and stuff. I've had one in my life. It was actually in Mexico when my husband and I were getting married and I don't really remember too much about it, which means it probably wasn't too traumatic, which is good, but it wasn't a mind blowing experience either.

Cause I really don't remember it too much. I just don't. I just, It doesn’t light me up. You guys, I don't get it. And I think that has probably to do with years and years of my own body image stuff that I've talked about in some previous episodes, especially I think episode one where I talked and did the intro, you know, I've had a lot of body image issues that continues to creep up every now and then. And I have to deal with that when that does creep up. So I think that massage specifically for me, it just, that's probably in the background. That's probably my subconscious related to the massage, but it's just not something that I enjoy. You're not going to hear me talking about going to the spa and getting a massage for self-care because honey, no, thank you. Okay. Uh, to get a good a hair, like go and get my hair done.

I do that. Not enough. I do it probably twice a year. The people that cut my hair could probably attest by the time I get there, it's grown out to all the way past my shoulders and the color is, I mean, the last time I went, my hair was almost all white. I was amazed. I had no idea because of the way I put my hair. When she started moving my hair around, I was literally almost all white. You guys, I almost considered going white, but I just thought I'm not quite ready for that. I mean, I'm 44 and maybe I don't want to go all the way white, although you know, that light gray, white is kind of in now. So anyway, I might try it. Who knows, uh, to get back to that. So getting my hair done would be something, but that's not something that can let you up every day because that's a, one-time bigger thing.

And you guys, I apologize. I'm sitting at my kitchen table because my son, my youngest Bryson is out of school yet. Again, I'm sitting out here in case he needs something, but the table is so creaky. I've got like this antique table, that's been whitewashed. And, but it's so creaky. So I'm sure you can hear it in the background. So I just apologize about that upfront, but let's talk about every day daily things. One of the number one things that I have done, uh, not quite a year, but close to it at this point is a daily routine that has really made me feel like at the end of the day that I have done something for myself, these small things that we can do in most of the areas that I just mentioned, that will make you feel like you took care of yourself today because it doesn't have to be this huge spa trip or this huge vacation.

It can be just small things you do every day. My daily routine, number one, number one I have about three or four things on my daily routine that I make sure that I do. And most of them happen before I even get out of the shower. And that way I know that they're done and I can feel good about it. So the first thing I do, and I've mentioned this before, I think is I pray before I get out of the bed. So before I get out of the bed in the morning, before my feet hit the floor, I pray. And sometimes it's a devotional that I'll open up my phone and I'll get on the devotional and I'll go through that. If I have enough time, otherwise it's just prayer. It's just talking to God before I get up, before my feet hit the floor.

And the good thing is my husband goes to work very, very early. So he's not usually there to hear me talk out loud to God. I just lay in the bed and I talk to God and I do that for a few minutes, whatever is appropriate for you. Okay. I don't, I used to feel very pressured. Like I need to get up at four 30 or 5:00 AM and make sure that I have enough time alone with God, but I have now felt comfortable enough to pray before I get up. But throughout the day I kind compress time. So like I, but like when I'm in the bathroom, washing my hands or when I'm in the, by myself, I'm usually talking to God. And so I compressed time that I already have. And so it's a little bit throughout the day, but I'm talking to God throughout the day.

Okay. So, so I pray. I pray before my feet hit the ground. The other thing I do is I repeat out loud several times, at least five things that I know God says about me. Like I am victorious. I am redeemed. I am restored. I am saved. I am healed. I am delivered. Okay. Whatever those words are that resonate with you for that day, or maybe you have a piece of paper that just has a list of all the things that you know that God says about you. Um, I have an episode about this and I don't know what the number is right now. There are so many words and so many things that God says about us that I just feel like very empowered. If I say those things out loud and remind myself who I am in God. And I say it out loud for all the, whoever might be listening, okay.

We never know what is out there ready for us in our day. And I want to prepare, you know, my armies of angels and also the demons that might exist, uh, that, you know, Hey, I am who God says, I am not who you are trying to tell me. I am today. Okay. Stand back, Satan. Not today. Satan, not today. I'm actually had a sweatshirt on it says not today, Satan. So that's funny. Okay. So the second thing I do before I get in the shower is I derive brush. Have you guys ever heard of what dry brushing is? Do you know what dry brushing is? Dry brushing is what it sounds like. You take a brush on your skin and you brush your skin. And the claims, if there's health claims about it. And I have to say it's claims because I don't want to, I'm not, I'm not your medical professional at this point, but it just helps wake me up.

Number one, like I am not a morning person. Anybody that knows me, especially people in my own household will tell you she's not a morning person. I would rather stay up all night long then to get up at the crack of Dawn. It's just me. It's his, how I'm wired. It just is what it is. But when I started dry brushing that literally activated my soul. I also have this daily ritual essential oils that I put on. It's called happiness. Oh my gosh, it's changed my life. Literally it activates my soul and I'm not kidding. There's something that happens within my body that wakes up. I feel like it wakes up myself. So I put that on and then I dry brush. And so dry brush is it's supposed to help with your like winter skin or flaky skin circulation. It's supposed to help detoxification start moving all of those things around to get out of your lymph because your lymph is what helps you.

Your lymph system is what helps you remove toxins from your body. So it's supposed to help us circulate and get the toxins that are in your body, to your limp. And it also can help with digestion and there's even some improvement, the appearance of cellulite. And that may or may not be true for you. I feel like it's helped the look of my legs, but I really do it because it literally it's, it's like activating all of your nerves in your whole body. So it just wakes me up. It just really helps me feel activated. But between that happiness essential oil that I use and the dry brushing, I just feel completely awakened. And then what I do is I get in the shower and while I'm in the shower, I listen to either Bible on a tape or it's like the Bible app. I listened to a devotional again.

I listened to worship music. Uh, so that's number three is, uh, pray, dry brush. And then I listen while I'm in the shower. And while I'm getting ready to either worse at music or a podcast that I've been in, it's usually about scripture somehow. Um, but worship or the, um, podcasts. And then after that I do a green smoothie. Now this is what has made the difference in my digestion. I feel like. And also my energy, because if you start your day with a green smoothie and it doesn't have to be, it's not nasty. Okay. To me, it tastes really good. And it's something that I actually started to crave. I started this back in, uh, August while I was recovering from COVID actually, and I've drank this green smoothie and it's stuff like kale and spinach. I put banana in there, uh, orange, strawberry, uh, cinnamon, and I'm forgetting, you can put mango in there, mango in there is really good, our peach, and that will sweeten it up a little bit, but the cinnamon is what's good.

So I just take it and I down it. Okay. Um, and then I put a couple scoops of collagen that I use powdered collagen that I use for my joints. And I do that. So those are the four things I do. That's like my am morning routine, that it just makes me feel more whole and it makes me feel better about myself. And I do think that it helps with, it helps me spiritually because the prayer and the repeating out who God says, I am, gets me ready. And it helps the, you know, the dry brushing I feel like helps me awaken and awaken my soul. And the green smoothie helps me physically because it's not only good because I mentally and emotionally and psychologically feel like I've done something healthy, but it also helps with digestion. I mean, it does help you keep things moving.

Okay. So those are my daily routines that I use. Okay. So that's the first thing that I would recommend is getting a daily routine that you feel good about and try to pack a few small things in there every day that you will feel good about. I mean, those are not mind blowing thing you guys, and they don't take that long. I pray, I do the dry brush. I listen to the Bible app or the devotional while I'm in the shower and getting ready. And then I do the green smoothie. And my tip about the green smoothie is just do a big batch, like do a whole blender full. And I just put it in the fridge and then I just pour it. I usually do one on Sunday night and then I have one for a couple of days and then I'll do another one after that runs out that night and then I'll have it for another couple of days.

So I only have to mix it and I keep it in a frozen bag. So I cut up all the spinach, cut up all the kale, cut up all the mango, whatever else I'm putting in there. And I just freeze it all in a bag. And that way, when I'm ready to do a next batch, it's just already there and it's cold. And I like the smoothie. I don't like a warm smoothie at all, especially a green smoothie. So I just, that kind of grosses me out a little bit. Yeah. Especially with texture and stuff. So the cold makes it feel more like a, like a cold slushy type of smoothie. So that's how I like it. Yeah. And so it, doesn't not take that any time, but it makes me feel so much better about my day it gets, it gets me started in a way.

So the way you start your day sometimes is just as important as how you end it. So I it's kinda like, um, everything I do, and this is not a morning routine as I, as far as like physically or whatever. Well, I guess it would count in the space area or the home area is I always make my bed. I never leave my bedroom without making my bed. It just does something to me when I walk into my room and I don't see my bed made, I just, it bothers me. So I guess I could add that actually. That's probably true. I always make my bed and I do that before I, as soon as my feet hit the floor, I'm making my bed. Now. That doesn't mean I, I put every single throw pillow that I have on my bed. Um, because I, my husband corrects up, I mean, my throw pillows and all the decorative pillows, it takes up half the bed, but it's really cool.

Q it's really pretty when it's all made up. So, but sometimes I don't put all of those pillows on there, but I do make my bed. Okay. That's the other huge thing. And that does help me with my, my space, my home. It makes me feel good about that. Okay. All right. So first thing I want you to do right now, what your morning routine is, and if you don't have one, make one and make it small enough that you know, that you can do everyday. Don't put a big list together that you feel burdened by this morning, your team, okay. That's the key, don't burden yourself by what you're going to put on this list. All right. So morning routine, do that. And then I just want to give you a couple other ideas of what your personal self care could look like in small things throughout your day, that will touch all of your areas of your life.

Because for example, at work, uh, boundaries, the way that you can put your personal self care first is to create boundaries. One of the things that used to drive me crazy at a particular place that I worked was that they never transferred anyone to voicemail. Or if someone showed up at the front door, they would just page you and, and make you answer that. Even if that person didn't have a scheduled meeting with you. And so what I always say is that someone else's emergency or lack of planning, doesn't constitute an emergency for me, or doesn't mean that I have to replan my day to accommodate someone else. Now. Sure. There are times where you would do that, but for the most part, creating those boundaries are important. Certain ways for you to take care of yourself that way you are in control of your day.

So at work, I would check emails on my time. People knew that if you want to get ahold of me, then you can walk around and you can find me. And then I will let you know whether or not I can do the task you're needing me to do right now. Um, I just made it very clear that I schedule myself in a way that I am prioritizing the tasks that I know I have to get done. I've got a lot of things that are pressing on me from all different areas. And the only way I can stay sane in that and take care of myself is to schedule it. And so when people try to come in, you know, poor things on you in the moment that may or may not be appropriate. So you have to develop that skill set to set that boundary and say, okay, I appreciate how important that is to you.

Here's when I can get to that, because I have a deadline on this and I have a priority for this, and I have to do through these two things first. So why don't you email me or send something to me on a calendar, like a meeting. And that way we can block that time together. And I always make my meeting, uh, calendar open so everybody can see it so that they know when I'm open and when I'm not okay, that's just the way that you can set a boundary. That's not always the easiest thing to do, but that's an example of something you can do in your work, the space to create that boundary so that you maintain the ownership of your own time and you don't allow other people to manage your time. Okay. Uh, another intro or another suggestion related to something like your personal interests, make sure that you are scheduling time to do something that you care about and you like to do, and that could be daily, or that could be weekly.

Okay. It could be reading a book, it could be listening to a podcast. It could be, um, knitting, whatever it is that you like to do, make sure you have some time for that. Maybe for you. It's being able to go to a church service, just whatever is, um, something we talked about physical, uh, we've talked about, so social, maybe it's scheduling a phone call. Maybe it is, uh, reaching out and saying, uh, sending a text to somebody that you haven't talked to in a while. I did that just the other day to a couple of girls that I hadn't talked to in a while. So just think about small things that you can do in each of these areas that will make you feel like you're taking care of yourself, because after all, if we're not taking care of ourselves, that stuff piles up, the small things become big things, and that can be a negative thing or a positive thing.

The small things that you do every day for yourself can become a big, big thing for yourself. And you're feeling really good about those outcomes because every small thing equals a big thing. So, and sometimes taking those small things lead to bigger things. So you add a green smoothie every morning, and then you make a choice for lunch that you're going to have a healthy lunch, and then you eat whatever you want for dinner, whatever. I'm not into this big diet culture that has ruled my life for most of my life. So I have taken a stand and said to myself, and made a commitment to myself that I'm not going to get caught up in this whole diet culture industry. And I'm just going to take daily steps and do small things that I know are healthy for me. And the small things add up to big things.

Okay. So just like, um, if you let's say that you don't have any more in routine, or let's say that you don't do any physical movement it today and then tomorrow and the next day and the next day and the next day, well then you could go a month, two months, three months, six months without any physical movement. And that would add up to a big outcome that you may not like the results of. Okay. So small things matter and small things on a daily basis are important to make sure that you're getting the outcomes that you want to get. And overall, that you're feeling like you're having the time to take care of yourself. I mean, that's just what it is. We want to make sure that we take care of ourselves. So emotional, those affirmations, that morning routine that I mentioned hits a lot of this psychological, physical, emotional, spiritual, personal professional.

It hits a lot of those self-care, uh, balancing acts. Okay. So if you get a good morning routine, like I mentioned, I said, pray, dry brush, um, listen to devotionals and a green smoothie that pretty much hits the entire balance of my life, all parts of my life, except for the work. Okay. Uh, it, it might prepare me for work. If I'm remembering that I am victorious, I am restored. I am redeemed. I am saved. I am healed. I am royalty. Okay. If I'm remembering those things and at work, when things happen and sometimes my emotional self is more ready to take on what comes at me. So you're kind of preparing your psyche and your emotions and your spirit to be ready for what's going to come at you. So that's how I kind of look at that. All right. I think that I've kind of gone over this and I've probably gone over it a couple different times, a couple of different ways.

So I think that I've hit the points, but I think the important thing to remember is that you don't have to think about taking care of yourself in this huge, this huge thing, this huge massage, this huge vacation you can think of. You're taking care of yourself and get closer to feeling a little bit more successful at that. A little bit more balanced at that. If you think about what you can do, small things in dental hit different areas of your life. So at the end of the day, you can feel good about what you did to take care of yourself, okay. Setting those boundaries, doing some, self-reflection saying some of those affirmations that we talked about doing a little bit of body movement. Okay. Another great thing to do is a rebounding. I don't know if you've heard of this, but it's a little mini trampoline.

So you just, you know, if you're going to watch something on TV, then maybe for five minutes, 10 minutes, you stand on this little trampoline and you do rebounding. Your feet are not coming off of the trampoline. You're just staying on the trampoline and you're just re bouncing, bouncing up and down. And that, um, uses all of the muscles in your body. That was a, that was a freebie, I think that's enough for today. What do you guys think? Yes. Get into the Facebook group and let me know what you decided to do. Did you create an am or a morning routine that hit a couple parts of our balancing wheel? Did you do that? Are you able to do that? Do you need help with that? Do you have questions about that? Okay. Let's do this thing together. We know that we're a community of women that want to balance our lives and we want to help each other and support each other.

And maybe Polly has a suggestion for Molly. Get in that group and post what it is that you're doing to take care of yourself today. And remember, just focus on today. That's all you gotta do. You can do anything for one day, focus on what you can do today to take care of yourself. All right, sisters. All right. I will see you guys in the next episode and until then stay safe, stay warm. I'm praying for Texas and all of these Southern States that are getting snow that they're not used to. My goodness. It's, it's like, um, uh, my pastor said last night on a meeting that 73% of the us is covered in snow. That's insane. Crazy. So praying for all of those that are out of electricity out of, or having blackouts, um, just not being able to deal with the snow that they don't normally get. It's crazy. So say, say, stay warm and stay balanced. All right, sisters. See on the next episode,

 

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EP 19 3 Tips to Getting Breakthrough in your Marriage- How to Make Relationship Better in One Day- Speak His Love Language

EP 19: 3 Tips to Getting Breakthrough in your Marriage- How to Make your Relationship Better in One Day

I wanted to talk today about our relationship piece of the pie, and I'm going to focus most on your spouse or your partner. And I just wanted to talk a little bit about some daily things that we can do to help us spread the love in our own relationship. So the first thing I want to talk about, I want to ask you if you know, what your spouse’s love languages, have you guys heard of this? It's called the Five Love Languages, and it's by Gary Chapman. And I have seen this it at this point, it was just at first with relationships, but it went to, uh, your kids, your teens, your workplace.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

The Love Dare Test, by Stephen Kendrick

Satan, You Can’t Have My Marriage, by Iris Delgado

POUNCE- Saved our marriage in the physical touch realm 😉
You will NOT regret trying this one out, & your hubs will THANK YOU.

Join us in the FB community: http://bit.ly/whollymadelifefbgroup

Contact me at angietoninirogers@gmail.com

#payitforward #spreadthelove

Welcome back to episode 19 today, we're going to talk about spreading the love. It is in honor of Valentine's day and it should post the week of, or the week after, I guess. But I wanted to talk today about our relationship piece of the pie, and I'm going to focus most on your spouse or your partner. And I just wanted to talk a little bit about some daily things that we can do to help us spread the love in our own relationship. So the first thing I want to talk about, I want to ask you if you know, what your spouse’s love languages, have you guys heard of this? It's called the Five Love Languages, and it's by Gary Chapman. And I have seen this it at this point, it was just at first with relationships, but it went to, uh, your kids, your teens, your workplace.

There's a five love language of work. You know how you can appreciate someone at work and it's all the same things. It's just, you tailor it for where you are, but I want to make sure that you know what these are, and I'll put a link below in the show notes about what the five love languages are. But these are really important because in order for you to really be seen and heard and perceive that you are showing love to your partner, you have to do it in the way that they understand it and receive it. So the five types are words of affirmation, quality, time, access, service, gifts, and physical touch. And first my question is, do you know what your love language is? There is a test or a quiz that assessment, whatever he calls it on his site, where you can go through and answer some questions and find out what your love language is.

And I would, I would suggest that you take that even if you've taken it in the past, because they may have shifted a little bit as you've grown, they may have shifted, and you might also be surprised at what your love language is. My personal love language is tied between quality time and acts of service. And my husband's love language is physical touch. My worst love language is physical touch. So go figure his number one. And I mean, by far his number one, like my top two were tied. He is way, way far away from others. Uh, his second one is quality time, but it's like several points away from his physical touch. So he is absolutely a physical Dutch person. And I am so far from physical touch. That that was difficult for me at the beginning of our relationship. And we've been together for about 24 years.

Well, yeah, a little over 24 years and no, it'll be 24 years in March. Oh my goodness. Yeah, it'll be 24 years in March. If you really work on showing love to the person that you love. Yeah. In a way that that person understands and receive that love, then they don't always feel like you're reciprocating love that they feel like they're giving and vice versa. He's very much on physical touch. And so that's how he would try to show me love, but that was not, and is not how I receive love. I receive love if you go change that light bulb that I've been asking you to change without me having to ask it more than once. Okay. Because that's an acts of service. That's why it's so important because we can be doing all this work and think that we are giving and giving and giving.

And if our partner is not receiving that, we have no idea. So this is about becoming aware and becoming accountable to do. What's not as comfortable for ourselves, but because we love our partner. We want them to know that we love them. And if they receive it in different way than we do, then we've got to make some changes and be intentional about showing them love, words of affirmation. That is where you just affirm and you listen actively. So a good way to show someone who scores high on words of affirmation is to, of course, verbally affirm them. But when you verbally affirm them, you want to be specific. You just don't. I don't want to be like, Oh, um, I love you. I love how you did that. Okay? If you're giving them a words of affirmation, you want to be specific. Like, I really liked the way you worked on that project.

I liked how you stayed focused until it was finished. You see how that's much more specific. It gives them an idea that number one, you're taking the time to verbally affirm them. But you are also giving them information that tells them what you liked about how they did that job. Another thing you could say, something like that is specific. Like I love the way that you handle that conversation with our oldest child. That was a difficult conversation, but you really showed him that you cared about him. And it, I think it made a difference. Not just you did a good job talking to Clayton. Okay. Does that make sense? So other ways, besides verbal being very specific and trying to really point out what you really liked about what they did to affirm them also notes, cards, texts, those are good ways to, you know, you just leave a note or a card on his seat, in his car when he opens up the door, or maybe you put a little I'll note in a lunch, or yeah.

Maybe you send him a text in the middle of the day that you wouldn't normally send. That is just saying, Hey, just wanted you to know. I was thinking about you. Love you, thank you for dinner last night or whatever. Okay. So that's words of affirmation. Second one quality time. And these are in no particular order. Quality time is when you have uninterrupted time with that person. Now this will go back to a couple episodes ago where we talked about the technique of being here now, which means being present in the moment. This is when you spend time with your person and you are spending dedicated time intentionally to be with them. It is sometimes intentionally scheduled because I know for us, it's very easy for us to go through an entire day where we don't have any time where we've sat down and have a conversation.

I mean, we've spoken throughout the day as we've gotten stuff done, but we haven't sat down and looked eye to eye and had a conversation about anything. I mean, that happens more often than not, unless you are intentional about the time that you are spending together. So 100% put away your phone, computer emails during the time that you're having this intentional quality time. Think about it. When's the last time you actually spent time with just you and him where you weren't also cooking or watching a movie or, or watching Netflix or with your kids. It's not that you can't do that things together. It's just that, is it an intentional schedule or is it just kind of by the way happening? And if that's just, by the way, that's how it happens. Then you may want to think about if your partners is quality time.

You may want to think about having intentionally scheduled time, at least once a week, or maybe even five to 10 minutes a day where you guys meet eye to eye and you have a conversation or you schedule something where it's just you and him doing something specific. Okay. Acts of service is the next one. And this is when you let someone know that you appreciate them and love them by lightening up their load. You are doing things without being asked because you know, that that person would appreciate that. And, and that shows that makes them feel loved. This is definitely one of mine and access service for me would be when I walk out to my car and my car has been washed and cleaned inside, or I have asked for a certain piece of furniture to be repaired or tightened up or whatever. And I don't have to ask for that to happen multiple times, he remembers to do it and he does it.

And I feel loved that way because it lightens my load. It, it takes something off of my plate. I'm just big with acts of service. That's how I feel loved. And if you notice, when you have your love language, like mine's quality time and access service, you are naturally going to show other people that you love them, or appreciate them by naturally participating in activities that are in that love language, quality time, and acts of service for me, for example. So like at church, I am all about serving. Like I will serve, serve, serve, serve, because I know that that is needed at the church. But I also, that is how I feel loved. So that's how I easily show love for my church community and my pastors and people at church. That's how I show them. And it's very natural to me. Okay. All right.

Next one is gifts. And this is just the simple is exactly what it says. It's gifts. It's letting them know that you're thinking of them through gifts. My dad is a hundred percent a gift giver. That is how he shows love to me and to his kids, to everyone. He knows. I mean, he let's see, there was a point where my boss had given us tickets to a concert. I invited my dad because it was U2. And I knew that he would really like that. So I invited my dad. He ended up sending a gift basket. He ended up sending that gift basket to my boss, to thank him for inviting us. That's just an example. That is how his father showed love was through gifts. And that's how he shows up. Now, my guess would be that my dad's love language is also gifts.

That's just a guess. I don't know that he's ever taken this test, but that would just be my guess, but it says simple things like, and I think that's a really important point is that is if you know what the love languages are and you know, another person you can assess what you think that their love language is. You can reciprocate that love with them. It just gives you a better understanding of who they are and what you can do differently to show that person love. I have another example of another lady that I worked with. She is very much a gifts person, and I knew that because she gave the most amazing thoughtful gifts. And so on her birthday and special occasions for her, I would always try to be very thoughtful in what I chose to give her as a gift, because I knew that if I was able to give her a good, thoughtful gift that she would feel loved by me.

Okay. So I think that's a really good point to make is that we can be more accountable and more personally aware and a better lover of people. If we understand the love languages and understand each of those and what each of those looks like and how we can show each other love, okay. Back to gifts. Oh, I saw this pair of shoes on sale and I knew you'd like them. So I bought them for you. No sin, no reason. Just because or something smaller like you, like, I know my husband loves these caramel brownie, like truffle brownies. And so I will just get those and make those for him sometimes without him asking me or hinting about it. And that's a gift, quote, unquote, a gift. That's just an example of how you might show someone love through gifts, physical touch. This is the last one for me.

But again, in no particular order, physical touch is definitely my husband's number one. Now this is not just doing the thing. Okay. There are lots of ways that you can show physical touch. It is so much low on my totem pole that I even, I have to practice. And I am very intentional. When my sons give me a hug, I've got two sons that physical touch are way high up there. One of them is number one in the, and the other one is kind of tied with another. When they give me a hug, I do not stop hugging until they release first. That's just one intentional thing that I do, because I know for me, it is not natural just to be in a physical embrace for a long period of time. I have made practice of intentionally not letting someone go in the hug until they let go.

First, you would be amazed at how many people crave that touch. There was a lady that came into church at one point, she said, you know, this is the only place that anyone ever touches me because she lived alone. She didn't have a partner or any kids in the home. And so when she came to church, that was the only place that she experienced any physical touch. And so it's important. Another thing about physical touch and this isn't necessarily about our love language, but this is just something I learned in a marriage conference and it made, it was a life changer. So when you are arguing with your husband or you guys are having a disagreement, I challenge you. The next time that's happening is to hold hands. It is really difficult to continue to argue with someone or escalate a disagreement while you're holding hands.

So physical touch is powerful, and I would challenge you to try that next time. We have tried to do that. Anytime that we feel like we're getting into a disagreement, we both try to remember to reach out and touch the other person, whether it's putting your hand on his knee or grabbing his hand and just looking at him and saying, we probably need to stop the conversation until we can get to a place where we're not so emotional about it. So that's another tip for physical touch.

Then finally, the other big thing that is going unsaid, but we know what that thing is. I have always struggled with in my just coming up. It's just been one of those things. I think it's related to physical touch. I think it's related to some past incident. It's just been one of those things that's been difficult.

And that can be very, very, straining in a relationship in a marriage where your husband is a number one, physical touch and everything else is way far below. So like, that's really the only way that he feels loved is through physical touch. So one thing that has really changed our lives is something called POUNCE. I'll just put that in the show notes. So if any of you guys have any of those issues, that's not just about the act. There's lots of things that play into that. But anyway, that'll be in the show notes for you to take a look at if you're, if you have any resonating with what I was saying, all right.

So those are the five love languages. So I would challenge you to, if you don't know what yours is, take the assessment and get your husband to take the assessment and then get your kids to take the assessment.

That way, you know, the more aware we are of where each other is, the better we can each choose to be accountable and choose to be intentional in showing our loved ones that we actually love them in a way that they can receive it, hear it, understand it, and get something from it.

Two other suggestions I have that we've done in the past. We related to love and your, your spouse. There's something called the love dare test. It's at the lovedaretest.com. There's a book called the Love Dare by Stephen Kendrick.

And then there's also a book called Satan, You Can't Have My Marriage by Iris Delgado throughout the years, we have done these together in separately, and these have made a huge difference in our marriage. So those are the three things I would suggest the love languages. The love dare test.com and get the book Satan, you can't have my marriage now choose one of these to do at once.

And then once you've done one and you kind of practice those, then move to the other. Don't try to bite off more than you can chew. You know, when we were talking about, you know, you can do anything for a day, just think about what can I, if I do the love language test, and I find out what mine is and what my husband's is, what can I do today? That is in, for example, the physical touch realm that my husband, that I can show my husband, I left him final challenge, and this is kind of fun. And I'll put it in the Facebook community. If you're not over in the Holy made life, Facebook community, jump over there and join the group. We are going to start for the rest of February. We're going to start a, pay it forward and spread the love campaign where we talk about, or we, we talk about, but also encourage each other to every single day, do one act of kindness, whether it's to someone in your family or someone outside a stranger that you don't know, we want to get into the season of February and pay it forward and spread the love.

So I will put a post in the community group where we can encourage each other. What I'd love to see is people posting every single day, what they did for their act of kindness for that day. And just as some examples to get you thinking about what those could be, it could be to offer, to give somebody a ride somewhere, or to pick up trash that you see in the community, bake cookies for somebody, you could write a letter or a small, thank you. Note to someone who's made a difference in your life. Uh, you could make a phone call to one of your friends. You haven't talked to in a while. You could send an email just to say hello to somebody without anything else that you need. You hold the door open for somebody. You could allow somebody to use the parking space that you were going to get.

You could go on and get one further back, be intentional about not complaining out loud about anything the entire day, hug someone a little bit longer than you would normally to show that you care about them. You could send flowers or send a box of candies to the nearest police or fire station. You could leave a note for your mailman or your mailwoman or your garbage collector. So these are just some ideas about what you could do. I am really excited about this, so I can't wait to hear what you are doing every single day, and let's just pay it forward and spread the love. Hashtag that, pay it forward. Hashtag hashtag spread the love. Okay, let's do this together because the more of us doing one random act of kindness per day, the more love we spread into the world. All right, ladies, I will see you in the next episode and let's pay it forward and spread the love.

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EP 18 Let's Talk about Money, What does God Say about Finances, Becoming Rich, Being a Successful Working Woman and a Great Mom & Wife!

EP 18 Let’s Talk about Money! What does God say about finances, becoming rich, and successful working women?

Well, we're going to talk about money today. We're going to talk about money. We're going to talk about what God has to say about finances. And We're going to talk about what you can do and your Piece of the pie for your finances. Let's get into it.

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Okay girls today, we're going to talk about  “Money, Money, Money, Money” .

I don’t own the copyrights to that song and I'm sure it sounded nothing like what that song is supposed to sound like anyway. Well, we're going to talk about money today. We're going to talk about money. We're going to talk about what God has to say about finances. And We're going to talk about what you can do and your Piece of the pie for your finances. Let's get into it.

Hey ladies, Welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life™. This is episode 18, and we're just going to talk about the financial pie today. And we're really just going to talk about what are the beliefs that you have around money, especially related to a equip a Christian view of what it is you've learned throughout your life about money. So I know there's that famous scripture that a lot of people have used to say that money. You shouldn't go after money and you, it's not okay to be rich and that kind of thing. So first Timothy 6: 10 talks about for the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It's through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs. So it's important to note, number one, that this says the love of money is the root of all kinds of evils.

It doesn't say that the money itself is evil. Money is just a vehicle. Money is just a tool. It's a resource to use, uh, much like if you have an idol and you are worshiping a golden calf, that statue itself by itself is not evil. The worshiping of that statue is evil. The act of worship for that idol, which is that gold star golden calf is the sin. Okay. So much like money is not sinful or evil in of itself. It's just a tool, but the love of money, which is greed is a sin. Okay. So, I think it was Dave Ramsey that said being rich will just amplify who you are, that means good or bad. So if you are a greedy person and you're not a giving person, then you will be more of that with the more money that you have, because you will use that tool or that vehicle in a way that doesn't line up with what the word of God says.

That's a lot easier to say that money is evil, especially if you don't have it, because then there's kind of an excuse of, well, I don't need it because it's evil, but it also takes out our responsibility to work for money or work for what we earn it's takes away that need to be disciplined with that resource. So if you've got the mindset that, well, I don't have money and it's okay because I don't want the trouble that comes with money. Well, then that just means that we're not the responsibility and using the discipline, using what it is that God has blessed us with. There will be poor always, and there will be rich, always. The other thing too, is that when you think about rich and the definition, that's all in perspective, the reality is a lot of people in the United States, regardless of their circumstances, are rich compared to someone in another country.

For example, I think I saw a stat, something like, you know, for every one person, uh, with an average salary of 20,000 or something like that per year, it's 160. People are in poverty in Bangladesh, I think is what the it was looking at. But the point is, is that what is rich? What even is that? What does that look like to you? Because there are different ways and the scripture talks about this as well. There are different way, ways to be rich. Rich doesn't have to equal money or, uh, things. There's another scripture in Matthew 19, it talks about it's easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God. So that's another popular scripture that people bring up, but that was in context to a young, rich ruler who was not able to give up what God asked him to give up.

It wasn't about his riches. It was about his inability to give up what God asked him to give up or what Jesus asked him to give up, give up all your belongings and things and come follow me. He wasn't able to choose at that point Jesus, over his materials, which means he held those materials in money, in as an idol. Okay. So that's the difference, understanding that it is not about the tool. It's not about how much money you have. It's about what you do with it and what heart you're doing it with. It is no secret that God asked us to give. There are. So, I mean, there are hundreds of scriptures about money. Deuteronomy 8:18 It says, you shall remember the Lord, your God for it is he who gives you power to get wealth that he may confirm his covenant, that he sort of your fathers as it is this day, Philippians four 19 says, and my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory, in Christ.

So the money and the blessing and the favor and all of your things come from God in the first place. So that's the other thing is that remembering that what you already have has been given to you as a gift from God, and he will only give us what we are ready and disciplined enough to steward. There's a lot of scripture about borrowing. It's clear that we are directed to not put ourselves in so much debt that we are in slaved to the lender. Proverbs 22:7 says the rich rules over the poor and the borrower is the slave of the lender, Romans 13: 19, Oh, no one. Anything except to love each other for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law and Psalms 37:21 is the wicked borrows, but does not pay back. But the righteous is generous and gifts. So that's where we're being told to give that speaks to not that we're bad people, if we have to take a loan on something, but it's about the discipline and the stewardship in which we choose to do those things.

So it's just about being mindful about what it is we are asking to borrow and what it's for 1 Corinthians 16: 12 says on the first day of every week, each of you is to put something aside and store it up as he may prosper so that there will be no collecting when I come. So that's about saving and being disciplined. Again, being disciplined with the money that we've been blessed with. Finally, the, this whole point about giving. If we have been blessed with a lot of money, a lot of materials, this also includes our gifts that we've been given. Then we are to give to others. It's always better to receive, to give than to receive. That's an acts 20 to 35. It's always blessed. It's more blessed to give than to receive. If we have a mindset of that, it's about, we should always be looking at, are we putting our money as an idol?

I'll use my personal example. When I felt that God was asking me to leave my position and my job, my salary, and give it to an offering to him as I processed that and prayed about sought counsel on that from a few of my close people that I trust that will give me the feedback I need. That's also in alignment with God's word. It was about what I was placing as an idol in my job, my career, I was in a sense idolizing that that had become what I trusted in. I trusted my job to provide for me. I trusted myself to provide for me. I depended on my own actions and gifts that I had been given by God, my own actions to ensure that we were provided for that became an idol. It wasn't that the salary was bad. In fact, I believe that I was blessed with that position when it got to the point where that I was trusting that as my provision, in my own actions, it was revealed to me that that was like an idol in my life.

So I had to be reminded that he would provide for me and that I needed to put him first when we're out, trying to make money. Yes, that is an end result of what happens for paid for the value that we provide in the workflow, in the workplace. Or if we have a business, we are paid for the value that we provide to others. And so we get compensated for that. There's nothing wrong with that. The problem Proverbs 31 woman, profited from providing value in the marketplace with things that she made with her hands and trading that she did, there's nothing wrong with that. It says, keep your life free from the love of money and be content with what you have for. He has said, I will never leave you nor forsake you. So if you get into a place where you're forgetting, who's providing that blessing in that favor in the first place, then you might be in a place where you need to reassess and make sure if you're stewarding what he's given you in the way that's in alignment with God, I'm not going to get into tithing necessarily in this episode.

But I do think that it's worth your time to pray about how much should you be giving back to God, whether that's through ministry that you're paying, paying into or a donation to a charity or to your church. Certainly if you have a church house that you go to, you should be pouring back into that church house, because that's where you're going to get fed spiritually and scripturally. That certainly shouldn't be the only place that you're getting that, but that's the community in which you guys are supporting and supported that you receive the word of God. So, and you should support the ministries that your community plays a part in. I think that's a part of our responsibility. When we are blessed with money, we should be spending that money to give back to God and whatever that means for you. You have to pray about that and understand what percentage that should be, where you should focus that money.

There is plenty of evidence in the Bible that we should be giving back to God. And that's another way that we can show that we trust him in providing for us. It says that it'll come back to us many times over when we give, okay, so actionable items about finances. Number one, write down on a piece of paper. What are the top five things that you believe about money? And then once you have those things, assess where those are coming from, and if they're based in truth, then great. If they're based in information that may or may not be in alignment with the truth, then those are the things you got to look at and see what behaviors are coming out of those beliefs. Okay. For example, if you, aren't giving a portion of your money back to supporting something from God church, a non-profit sponsoring a child, whatever it is that you pray about and decide, that's how you're going to give back to God.

If you're not doing that, why is that? Is it that you don't trust in the provision that you've been given? Is it that you don't think that you'll have enough? Is it that you love your money and you don't want to give it away? Assess why it is you are holding on to that. Okay. That's just an example. If you think that money is evil or you've realized that money is evil, then get into the Bible and read about that or seek some counsel about why it is you believe that and what you can do differently to steward what it is God's giving you. And to actually go out and increase, because if we are in abundance, then we can give to others abundantly. And I believe that that's what God wants. I believe God wants us to receive from him so that it's overflowing.

If it's overflowing and we have a heart of giving and love for God and love for our brothers and sisters, then we would want to give our overflow. And that will only enhance the kingdom here on earth. Here's another tip that I would give you related to money. And it would be to make sure that you have a savings of at least $1,000. Now some of you may be saying, Oh my goodness, I'm living paycheck to paycheck as it is. I can't even fathom having a thousand dollars savings, but just start small. Think about what are you doing every single week that you could go without, for example, a Starbucks, can you do a coffee at home instead and say that six, seven, eight, nine bucks. And if you're getting two or three of those a week, then a month worth of Starbucks, think about how much that could be in a savings account.

The key is for savings is that you always want to have a thousand dollars in a savings account in case something crazy happens with health, with a, like a copay you have to pay, um, with health insurance, uh, ER, visit, or let's say you need a new battery on your car, new brakes, whatever. If you have a thousand bucks in a savings account that takes the pressure off and you are so much more able to steward your finances in a way that is not from a lack mentality, I guess, or anxiety driven situation. When you're faced with an emergency, I've had this for the past, probably four years where I've had a thousand dollars in savings that I do not touch, unless there has been some sort of emergency. And let me tell you something, there have been several we've had to buy a new engine.

We've had to buy a new set of tires. We had to buy a new water heater, an MRI that we had to get and pay for out of pocket. So when you have a thousand bucks sitting in your savings account that, you know, you can use for emergencies. And what I do is write down what kinds of things constitute an emergency so that I don't touch it. And I also have an account that I don't have a debit card attached to. I don't have any way to get to it without having to go to the bank to get it. That keeps me from dipping into that. That would be a way to be responsible and use discipline in stewarding the money that God's giving us back to that if you have anything in your life that you can look at to say, okay, if I stopped getting a Starbucks and I only got one once a week, then how much money would that be?

And let me put it into a savings until I hit a thousand bucks. And then of course you don't touch it until you've got that emergency. And once you have that emergency, then you start sacrificing one Starbucks a week or whatever it is for you. I don't even drink coffee y'all so I just know how much people spend on Starbucks. And it's like, Oh my gosh, that's a way that you can quickly get to a thousand bucks in your savings account. And I am telling you, it will take so much pressure off your back and so much anxiety away from a situation that might come up when you have to pay for that MRI or the brakes go out or whatever it is. Okay. Those are the two things. Write down what your beliefs are about money, figure out where they come from and then figure it, make sure you've got a thousand bucks in a savings account.

And then once you get that, then you start working on paying down whatever debts you might have, credit cards, et cetera. And I don't know if you've ever heard of Dave Ramsey's snowball to pay off quickly. So basically the debt snowball real quick. And we did this with all of our credit, except for we've got four things left. We've got the cars, we've got the house and I've got student loans that I'm still working on. Take a look at Dave Ramsey stuff. There's all kinds of stuff out there about the snow, that snowball. So that's the other thing that I would work on. As you know, I'm not working in a full-time job right now, I'm doing coaching. And by the way, you can get coaching. If you would like to get coaching, uh, half hour sessions and one hour sessions, and you are welcome to email me at Angie, tonyRogers@gmail.com, but I'm doing coaching.

I'm doing some teaching and that kind of thing. So what has come in very handy is that I had worked these past said four, but probably about five years paying off everything saving so that when I was able to give up my job, give up that salary that we have, we are still, okay, God has provided. He has sent me some clients. He has sent me different opportunities that I can take a part in that still allows me to have the flexibility to be working from home. So it's been amazing that God has provided. He does what he says. He's going to do guys, listen, like I said, I still got cars and a house and student loan debt to pay off. So I'm still working on that as well. None of us have it exactly as we want it, but it's about making small steps.

So in your financial bucket or in your financial piece of pie, you've talked about what are your beliefs about money? You're working on making small steps so that you can get that thousand bucks in a savings and then you start working on your debt. Okay. And it doesn't have to be that overwhelming look at today. What you can do differently today, maybe you don't buy the Starbucks or today. Maybe you don't take that target run, which I don't know about you, but I can't get out of target under a hundred bucks. So I just don't go as much as possible. I've actually, I think I've been to target one time since I stopped. It's working full time, uh, in a nine to five in a corporate job. I do that on purpose. I do that intentionally because I know that it is hard for me to get out of target under a hundred bucks.

So anyway, just making some daily different steps that you can take like that. Okay. All right, ladies, make sure that you join us over in the Facebook group, because that is a community of women that are supporting each other in each area of our lives. None of us have it all together in any parts of our, and every parts of our life, but all of us have strengths and areas for growth that we can either help someone else with. If it's our strength or we can receive from others whose strengths are maybe our areas of growth. Okay. All right, ladies, I'll see. On the inside of the group.

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EP 17 Is Your Motherhood a Mess? How to Make Sure Your Kids Are Seen and Heard in 15 Minutes or Less Every Day- How to Succeed as a Mother

EP 17 Is your motherhood a mess- how to make sure your kids are seen and heard in less than 15 minutes a day- How to succeed as a mother today!

So the first thing I want to start with is talking about motherhood, being a mess. First of all, I want to know what does your motherhood being a mess even mean? Can you even define what your motherhood being a mess is? What does that look like to you? What does it feel like to you? Who says it's messy?

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What does Motherhood being a Mess even mean? 

How do you define Motherhood?

What does it mean to be a mother? 

How do I know if I'm doing motherhood the right way?

Am I failing as a mother?

Where did I learn how to be a mother? 

Who defines whether I'm a good mom or not?

How can I see or hear my kids every day? 

How can I spend time with my kids every day?

Use the technique of Be Here Now. Be present in the moment. Don't focus on the past or the future. Focus on right now. Avoid multitasking. Focus on the person in front of you for 15 minutes per day. Use time blocking to schedule time with your kids. Be intentional about spending time with your kids. 

Don't compare yourself to other mothers. God gave you your children on purpose, for a purpose. 

Join a community of other mothers to learn from them, share your stories, give your testimony, empower each other, encourage each other. Sisterhood, Friendships, Motherhood

Welcome back to episode 17. And today we're going to talk about, is your motherhood a mess and how to make sure your kids are seen or heard in 15 minutes or less a day. All right. So the first thing I want to start with is talking about motherhood, being a mess. First of all, I want to know what does your motherhood being a mess even mean? Can you even define what your motherhood being a mess is? What does that look like to you? What does it feel like to you? Who says it's messy. Okay. You know, in the garden where God asked Adam and Eve, once they were, uh, covering themselves with the leaves, he asked them who told you, you were naked. Well, who has told you that your motherhood is a mess? Has someone told you that? Or are you telling yourself that?

And where did you get the idea that your motherhood is a mess? So I want you to first think about really, I really want you to think about what does your motherhood being a mess mean? Like where do you get that definition from? What does that look like? What are you using to define or judge that your motherhood is a mess. But when I started thinking about this, as far as when you hear people say, Oh, my motherhood's a mess, I'm a mess. Um, I'm like, well, what does that mean? That you're a mess or that your motherhood is a mess. And who, or where do you get those thoughts who are aware? Do you get those definitions? And so my thought was, I couldn't really think of how motherhood was a mess, which also meant that if I can't really define what motherhood being messy is then can I even define what motherhood should look like?

Like, what is motherhood look like if it's not a mess, can, I mean, can any of you guys even define it? What I'd love is for you to hop over to the Facebook community, Holy made life. And let's talk about this because I want to hear your ideas of what motherhood being messy is, or your motherhood being a messes. If your motherhood wasn't a mess, what would it look like to you? Is there a picture in your head that you think of that motherhood should be? Is there something that you're thinking of as motherhood being defined as what it should look like, feel like, and what is that? If not, then how do you even know if you're doing it right? Or how do you even know that you're not doing it right? If you don't even know the answer to what motherhood is or what being a good mom looks like, then how in the world do we ever achieve being a good mother or achieve motherhood, not being messy.

You know, it's kinda like that. It's kind of like saying, um, you know what? I want you to go. I'm talking to my kid, Hey, go and get that. Watch them a call it, my kids like, okay, what's that? Where's that? How do you get there? What do you do? Where do I go? What am I looking for? Right. So if you're not even realizing what you're looking for or what it's supposed to look like or where to go to find it or what to do to get it, then how are you ever going to achieve? What quote, unquote, motherhood, not being a mess. It's you can't sit there and compare yourself to something or someone or somewhere that you don't even know what it is you're going after. Like how do you even know what motherhood not being a mess is if you don't know how to define it, you know what?

And if I say to my kid, Hey, go get that Shema last day. I mean, if he doesn't know what he's looking for, then how in the world are either enough, either of us and I get to this shallow Mosty, look, I don't even know what the word was. Cause I made it up. Cause I don't even know what I'm asking for. Right. I don't even know what it is. My goal is when I talk about motherhood, not being a mess. So the actual definition of motherhood is the States of being a mother. Okay. The state of being a mother, that's it. Everything else we're talking about, everything else you're saying, thinking of is actually outside of the definition of motherhood. So if you're attaching other things to the word, then at least let's have an awareness of where we're pulling that information from. Is it social media?

Is it motherhood magazine? Is it cosmopolitan? Is it, um, what to expect when you're expecting? I mean, to mother means to be a mother means to bring up a child with care and affection. So my guess is, is that on a daily basis, you are probably doing exactly what you should be to bring your child up with care and affection. You're looking after someone protectively and kindly. Okay. That's the other definition that you see as far as to mother and then finally to mother is to give birth to, so if you've given birth to your children and you're bringing up a child with Karen affection, well, you are succeeding in motherhood. So I think the, the point is here is that let's be really careful about defining our motherhood and the success of how good of a mother we are by things that are not necessarily meant to define the state of our motherhood, the state of being a mother.

Now, what we're probably describing are things that we experienced during motherhood, right? It's hard, it's exhausting. Sometimes it doesn't feel as rewarding as we would like it to. Sometimes we feel like we have failed in a situation because we lost our patients or lost our temper or we yelled. Or we said something that we shouldn't have said in anger. Sometimes I think that when we think about our motherhood being a mess, it's talking about the experiences as we care for our children. So I just want us to be mindful of let's at least first define where it is. We are getting our definition of what makes us a good mother and what makes us, and also let's put it in perspective because if you look at your motherhood, well, all of us are still mothering. If we have children or we have adopted children, or we've taken someone into our home to, um, bring up with care and affection, then we are still in the process of mothering.

We are still in the state of being a mother. So you can't mess up the entire motherhood in one day because you're always in process of being a mother. And that will continue until the day you die. Sometimes we make it bigger than what it needs to be. And we make it this big abstract thing out there that defines our entire state of motherhood. Instead of thinking about what can I do today to be a good mother. So that's what I want to talk about is let's make it small enough so that every single day we can practice being a good mother and we can learn to be a better mother tomorrow or later today, even. I mean, when you think about your kids and you think about, I mean, I want my kids to be successful. I want him to contribute to community. I want him to make an impact in the world.

Well, that's all great and fine. And absolutely, of course we want our children to contribute to society and be positive members of the community, but that doesn't happen today in, in all end of things, right? It doesn't happen today. And that's the end of it. It's an ongoing process because our children are growing every day and learning every day and becoming who they're supposed to be every day. Just like we are as women, as wives, as mothers, as bosses, as sisters, as friends, right? So our children are always going to continue to grow and learn just like we do. So it doesn't happen in one day. But what can we can do is start to focus today. How can we be successful in being a mother today? So I want to break down a technique that I like to use. And, um, it's called being in the moment or be here now.

And what that does is it gives us the opportunity to really focus on our children in the moment. And this is not just a technique for motherhood. This is a technique for any relationship that you may have. So an example of this outside of motherhood would be if you're in a meeting at work or at the church or wherever you are on a zoom meeting, how many of us are doing other things while we're at the meeting, maybe we're looking at our phone. Maybe we're sending emails. Maybe we are checking our Apple watch. Um, I don't have an Apple watch, but a lot of people do. So what that means is that we're multitasking. And if you're multitasking, it's impossible to focus on one thing at a time. It's impossible to give your attention fully to the person or persons that are in front of you.

Being here now is an intentional acts that we can take that allows us to be present in the moment. We're not in the past thinking about everything we should have woulda coulda done. And we're not in the future missing. What's happening right now in the present we're here now. And the technique is to really be intentional about being present in the moment at what's happening right now. So we are listening intently to the person that's in front of us. So when you think about your child and I am so guilty of this, so I've had to start being intentional about one particular thing that I'm going to tell you here in just a minute, but I'm so guilty of all of a sudden, I'll hear my kids say, mom, mom, and I'll be, and it'll be very urgent and pressured. And I'll be like, what?

He's like, I called you 12 times and you have ignored me. You haven't answered me. And I literally didn't hear it. Him calling me yet. He's been in the background yelling my name 12 different times, several different times until finally I heard him because he's screaming in my face. Mom, mom, that's an example of me being present in physicality with my son in the same room, but not being present to him or for him. And usually what's happening is I'm either on the phone, maybe I'm on social media, maybe I'm checking emails, maybe I'm reading texts or sending texts. Maybe I'm watching TV, which is the least likely out of all of those things. So what you can do part of the title was how to make sure your kids are seen or heard in 15 minutes or less a day. What you can do is let's just start with today and 15 minutes, okay? Let's dedicate 15 minutes where you put everything else away, no phone, no social media, no texting, no TV. And you're looking at your child. And your intention is to listen to understand what it is your child needs, what they want, what they want to do. And also if you're looking at your child, you see their body language, their eye contact, their fidget,

And you notice so many of them,

More things. If you are being here now, while you are not only listening to the words or listening to the sound, but you're looking at them and you're listening to the entire person, you're watching the way their head moves, their eyes, their hands, their body, you're watching them shift uncomfortably. When they're talking about a certain thing, some of these things you miss, or I miss, you know, I'm guilty of this too. Some of these things that I have missed in the past, or even today present, if I'm not practicing the be here now, and this is something you have to practice, but you're missing all of those extra cues and extra opportunities to connect with the person in front of you because you're preoccupied or you're not fully listening. Or sometimes we listen to respond. Instead of listening to understand, if we're just listening to understand, then we're really trying to put ourselves in their shoes.

We're trying to intentionally use empathy and understanding. Versus if you're listening to respond, you're thinking about what it is. You can say next. So as you're listening, you're in your head thinking what you're going to say next. Well, you cannot do two things at once. You can't really listen to what they're saying and pay attention to their body language and everything else. And also come up with your next response. So the technique is a specific, intentional action that you take in order to be present in the moment. And it's called be here. Now, you're not thinking about the past and you're not thinking about the future. You're right here right now. So what if you scheduled 15 minutes a day with each child to either have a conversation or maybe it's to play Legos, maybe you give that choice to the child about what it is he or she wants to do for that timeframe.

And you look at them, you interact with them. Maybe it's just to sit with them. Maybe it's just the cuddle. How much more effective can you be at listening and connecting with your child if you're being present in the moment without other distractions? So that's the biggest tip that I have is to be here now. And certainly we can't do it all the time because we are moms and we do wear a lot of hats. But a lot of what we've talked about in a of a lot of these past episodes are ways to be intentional about what it is we're doing. So this is another skill that you can practice and be intentional about practicing it. Something else that I've done for the past two weekends is turn off social media. On Friday nights, I have not checked messages. I have turned off the notifications to my messages on Instagram and Facebook, and I haven't needed to delete the app.

But if you're a type of person that will just click it out of boredom or click it when there's nothing else to do, then maybe you need to delete the app altogether. What if you do it just for the 15 minutes that you are going to dedicate to being with your child today. Okay. And this is the thing make it about today. Because again, when you think about motherhood as a whole, yeah, that's really overwhelming to think about all the times we've messed up all the times I've messed up, done the wrong thing, said the wrong thing. Um, yelled too loud, you know, responded in a way that was impatient or an anger. If I think about all those things all the time, that's really overwhelming, but we know about God's grace and we know about his mercy. And so that's what keeps me from just going kind of nuts is because I know that God can fill in the gaps where I wasn't able to, you know, be the best that I could be.

Okay. So the focus is, is to be present, be specific, be intentional about, just start with 15 minutes a day, you can do anything for 15 minutes a day, right? When you look at it like that instead of a lifetime of motherhood or even a year or a week, when you think about it in just today. So today, what can I do to let my child know that I love him and that he's important and that I'm hearing him, you can do 15 minutes a day, right? Use that technique be here. Now let me know how it goes. I would love to hear an example of what you did to try to be here now, eliminate distractions, and really listen to understand in the moment, I'd love to hear your testimonies about how you were able to do that. What worked for you, what didn't work for you.

And I think in the community, in the Facebook community, there's a lot of sisters in there that can resonate with what it is. You tried, what it is that worked, and then maybe what it is that didn't work because that's the other key to there. So the second thing I want to bring up real quick is you're going to be here now. And you're going to think about it just today to make it more manageable and make it more bite-size. But the, so it's really the third thing. First thing is be here. Now, second thing is to talk about just today, what can you do today to be here now? And third is to get in community with other mothers. I promise you, there are other mothers that you can be in community with that struggle, same places that you and I do when we're in community.

And we can talk to each other and support each other, encourage each other, give each other our own testimonies of successes and failures, then better for it. And you know, my pastor said something the other day that I was like, yeah, that's so true. You know, you'd say, you know, that saying of it takes a village to raise a child. Well, it takes a village to raise me as an adult. It takes a village or a community to raise and grow me because we're never stopping in our growth. Right? We are continuing to grow. And if we're continuing to always grow and we're continuing to always be raised up in Christ, then our community is a place that God has called us to, to live that out with walk out that thing together in life. And so community is the, the third thing that I want to encourage you to get into a community, whether it's a Facebook group or any other place, maybe it's your church group.

Um, maybe it's a group of friends, but get into community with moms. Talk about it and remember to be here. Now, when you're listening to that, mama share her story because maybe you have some advice for her, uh, that she hasn't thought of. Yeah. Maybe a word of encouragement or maybe a, yeah, me too. I feel that way too. Okay. Okay. All right, girls, let me just pray about this with you guys, because it's just about being strengthened and being realistic about what the expectations of motherhood are, understanding that you were given your children on purpose for a purpose. No other mother can raise her children. Like you can, you were put there on purpose. God knew exactly what he was doing by putting you in the spot to raise that seed, to raise your child. And he also puts you in the communities that you're connected with on purpose as well, because it does take a village to raise a child, but it takes a village to raise each other too.

We're always growing. So are our children. So you never failed. As long as you don't quit, you've never failed. You can't fail if you don't quit. Okay. And every day is a new day. Heck every minute is a new is a new minute. So I messed up this past half hour. Well, let's take a 15 minutes and let's not mess up. Let's actually, um, do what we say we were going to do. And let's be here now for the next 15 minutes. And that could impact our child way more than just happened 30 minutes ago. Okay. So give yourself some grace. Okay. None of us are meant to be perfect. None of us are meant to be the perfect mother and none of us are ever going to achieve the perfect motherhood. Quote, unquote, I'm doing air quotes right now. None of us are going to achieve motherhood while we're still alive, because it's an ongoing thing.

It's it never ends. We will always be a mother and we always have an opportunity every minute that goes by, we have another opportunity. So I know that each of us can be empowered to do the best that we can do in just 15 minutes. Break it down to however small you need to break it down to, to make it work. Don't make it so big that you feel like it's a goal that you can never reach. And certainly do not compare yourself to other mothers that you see, because the reality is you don't live 24 seven with that mother and you don't know everything that happens in that home. And so you're only comparing yourself to what the story that you're telling yourself about what you see in front of your eyes, whether it's on social media or in a magazine or on TV or whatever it is.

You're, um, you're, you're pulling that information from just remember, that's not a reality. That's the reality that you've created and told your story about, okay, that's not, you don't live their life and you don't know what's happening in their home. So don't compare your state of motherhood with other mothers. Certainly let's be in community and talk and encourage and empower with each other, but let's not compare ourselves to each other. Okay? God, I want to thank you today for my sisters, my friends, my fellow mothers. And I just ask that you give us each the clarity and, uh, about what it is you're calling us to do and how it is that you want us to serve our children, let us be attentive to the needs of our children. Let us have the strength that we need to, uh, stay in patients to use wisdom and discernment.

When it is we're responding to whatever happens with our children and help us know that you are standing in the gaps when we have not done what we felt like we should have done and let us not be condemned. There's no condemnation in Christ. So there's no guilt or shame. That's not of God. We want to be accountable. God point out to us, let the Holy spirit convict us where we need to be convicted and help us repent, which means turn away from those things that we've done that are damaging to ourselves and to others. But give us the strength to walk in grace and mercy, as you have given us and give us the strength to walk in. Love the love that you have shown us. Let us show that love to our children. Thank you for all that you've done in the name of Jesus. Amen. Okay, sisters, uh, don't forget to join us over on the Facebook group. Holy made life. I can't wait to see you over there until then. I'll see you on the next episode.

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EP 16 Who Does God Say That I Am? What Does God Say About Me? Seeing Yourself in Scriptures- True Identity in Christ Jesus. Alignment with the Truth in Scripture for Busy Moms

EP 16 Who does God Say that I am- What does God Say About You- Seeing Yourself in Scripture- True Identity in Christ Jesus

I think it's important to, if you're not used to using the words in the Bible, the truth in the Bible of who God says that you are, then this could actually change your life. So I'm just going to start off by going through some of the words that I wrote down. And I read to myself every single morning for almost a year so that I could remind myself of the truth so that my mind would be transformed and be perseverating on the truth versus the lies.

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Welcome back, sisters, to this episode, 16 of Wholly Made Life. So I'm going to go over a continuation of our spiritual piece of our pie. I really wanted to talk through something I talked about in the last episode, episode 15, about our spiritual piece of the pie and where I referenced, focusing on who God says that I am. And I wanted to go through some of these things, because I think it's important to, if you're not used to using the words in the Bible, the truth in the Bible of who God says that you are, then this could actually change your life. So I'm just going to start off by going through some of the words that I wrote down. And I read to myself every single morning for almost a year so that I could remind myself of the truth so that my mind would be transformed and be perseverating on the truth versus the lies.

And this made up stories that we tell ourselves. So who does God say that you are? What does God say about you? And how can you see yourself as God sees you in the scriptures? What is your true identity in Christ? Jesus? So here's some of the things. Here's what I want you to say to yourself. I am loved. I am worthy. I am purposed. I am his, I belong. I am called. I am chosen. I am royalty. I am an heir. I am accepted. I am adopted. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am created in his image. I am redeemed. I am restored and renewed and refined. I am saved. I am forgiven. I am transformed. I am valuable. I am spirit filled. I am powerful. I am mighty. I am strengthened. I am able, I am free. I am sealed and delivered.

I am faithful. I am a friend of Jesus. I am full of peace. I am lavished by grace, a child of light. I am Holy and righteous. I'm a Saint, a steward, a servant and a soldier. I'm a witness and a worker. I am victorious. I'm a citizen of heaven. I'm no longer a slave to sin. I'm an ambassador for Jesus. I'm set apart and sanctified. I'm a special possession. I'm made new. I'm anointed. I'm triumphed. I'm joined with the Lord. I'm one with him in spirit. I am blameless before God. I am God's workmanship. I am blessed and favored. I'm covered protected. I am safe on salt of the earth, light of the world. I'm completely forgiven. I'm a temple of the Holy spirit. I am bold, courageous, confident I am above and not beneath the head and not the tail. I am more than a conqueror and an overcomer.

I'm justified by grace. I'm a quit. I'm rescued. I'm complete. I am whole, I am healed. I am far from oppression. I will not live in fear. Belonged to him. I'm intricately woven. I am seated in high places. I'm raised up with Christ. I'm made alive in Christ. I've given access to the father. I'm a member of the body. I'm a member of God's household. I am given hope. I am given faith. I am given peace. I am given mercy. Okay. So I don't know about you, but if I read these things to myself every single day, and I'm reminded of all of those things, I don't know how you can't walk with your head up and shoulders back and chest out and walk powerfully. And in the authority and dominion that he has given us. Those are powerful things that God says about that about us.

And Ephesians is one of the best places to go to read through what God says about you. Uh, in Ephesians four, he says things like I can mature spiritually. I can be certain of God's truth. I can have a new attitude and a new lifestyle in Ephesians five and six. He says things like, I can honor God through my marriage. I can parent my child with composure. I have God's power. I can stand firm in the face of evil. Okay. So I, again, just wanting to give you some of these things that I wrote down and you don't have to write down all of these things, but certainly I don't know about you, but before your feet hit the floor in the mornings, if you read through all of these things out loud, number one, what you profess with your mouth is real and it's powerful.

And also why not just shake up the devil and let the devil know, Hey, I'm getting ready to get up. And my feet hit the floor and I am God's warrior. Okay. I'm God's woman of God. And I am all those things that I just shouted out loud. Here's another couple of things. So there's a lot of places in the new Testament, Ephesians Romans, uh, John, and first John Corinthians, Galatians, Philippians Colassians Timothy Corinthians. I think I said that first and second Corinthians, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Those are all, some great places to find yourself in how God sees you and how it is confirmed by the truth of scripture. Some other places in the old Testament are going to be Proverbs, Proverbs 31. I think all of you guys probably know that Proverbs 31 is related to, you know, you've heard about the Proverbs 31 woman.

So I'm just going to read a little bit of the Proverbs 31 women, because this kind of also speaks to eludes to who it is that God says that you are so a good, woman's hard to find and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve and never has a reason to regret it. Never spiteful. She treats him generally all her life long. She shops around for the best yarns and cottons and enjoys knitting and sewing. She's like a trading ship that sails to far away places and brings back exotic surprises. She's up before Dawn preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day. She looks over a field and buys it. Then with the money she's put aside, she plants a garden. First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work and is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.

She's skilled in the craft and of home and heart diligent and homemaking. She's quick to assist anyone in need. She reaches out to help the poor. She doesn't worry about our family. When it snows though, their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing and dresses and clubs, colorful, linens, and selves. Her husband's greatly respected it. And when he deliberates with the city fathers, she designs gallons and sells and bring sweaters. She nits to the dress. Shop. Her clothes are well-made and elegant. She's always faces tomorrow with a smile. When she speaks, she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly. She keeps an eye on everyone in our household and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her. Her, her, her husband joins in with words of praise. Many women have done wonderful things, but you have outclassed them.

All charm can mislead. And beauty soon fades the woman to be admired. And praise is the woman who lives in the fear of God. So she's, God-fearing give her everything she deserves. And I Dorn her life with praises. So I think that some of us are overwhelmed sometimes when we read this about, Oh my goodness, this was like an amazing woman. And certainly she is, but we are the Proverbs 31 women. We are this woman and it doesn't mean we have to be perfect and do all these things, but we are blessed. We are admired. We are respected. We are treating people with kindness. You know, we are going to work, whether it's in our homestead where we're the CEO of our own home, or we are, have a career that we are bringing home, the bread, the bacon giving part of the finances. Maybe some of us own some of our own businesses.

Maybe some of us own some of our side, a side hustle. So we're doing these things and these things point to some of those declarations that I just went through. Uh, another place to look is Psalms one Oh three so quickly. I want to read through this one. And these are all messaged, translations. All my soul. Bless God from head to toe. All bless his Holy name. All my soul. Bless God. So don't forget a single blessing. He forgives your sins. You're forgiven. He heals your diseases. Every one you're healed. He redeemed you from hell. He saves your life. You're redeemed and saved. He crowns you with love and mercy. Aperitifs crown. You are royalty. He wraps you in goodness, beauty, eternal. He renews your youth. You are renewed. You're always young in his presence. God makes everything come out, right? He puts the victims back on their feet.

You're victorious. He showed Moses how he went about his work, opened up his plans to all Israel. You have wisdom and discernment. God is sheer mercy and grace not easily angered. He's rich in love. He, you are loved. He doesn't endlessly, nag and schooled or nor hold grudges forever. He doesn't treat us as our sins deserve nor pay us back in full of our wrongs. As high as heaven is over earth. So strong. It's his love to those who fear him. We're God-fearing and we're strengthened by him. And as far as sunrises from sunset, he has separated us from our sin. As parents feel for their children. God feels for those who fear him. He knows us inside and out for. He knows the plans that he has for us. That's in Jeremiah 29 11. He keeps us in mind that we're made of mud.

He created us in his image by his own hints. Men and women don't live very long, like wild flowers. They spring up in blossom, but a storm snuff them out just as quickly leaving nothing to show. They were here. We are destined for higher places where we're seated in high places. God's love though is ever an always eternally present to all who fear him, making everything right for them and their children. As they follow his covenant ways and remember to do whatever he said, God has set, had set his throne in heaven. We are seated in high places. He rules over all of us, the Lord, God omnipotent reigns. And we are adopted by him. We are in air to his kingdom. He's the King. So bless God. You angels ready and able to fly at his bid and quick to hear and do what he says.

Bless God. All you armies of angels alert to respond to whatever he will bless God, all creatures, wherever you are, everything. And everyone made by God and you. Oh my soul. Bless God. That was Psalms one Oh three with my interjections of some of these declarations that we just read. Okay. And then finally, what I want to point out is Psalms 91. This one has kind of helped me set fast through the whole COVID situation. When I was trying to keep my hospital safe and I'm making decisions that impacted patients and staff. So Psalms 91, you who sit down and the God in high God's presence spend the night and it should eyes shadow. Say this God, you're my refuge. He's our safe place I trust in you. And I'm safe. That's right. He rescues you from hidden traps. We are rescued shields. You from deadly hazards.

We are covered in protected his huge outstretched arms protect you under them. You're perfectly safe. His arms bent off all harm, fear, nothing not while Wilson, the night not flying arrows in the day. Not disease that prowess of the darkness, not disaster that erupts at high noon, even though other succumb all around drop like flies, right? And left, no harm will even graze you. You are more than a conqueror. You'll stand untouched. Watch it all from a distance. Watch the wicked turn into corpses. Yes, because God's your refuge. The high God, your very own home evil can not get close to you. Harm can not get through that door. He ordered his angels to guard you wherever you go. If you stumble, they'll catch you. Their job is to keep you from falling. You'll walk unharmed among lions and snakes and kick young lions and serpents from the pack.

If you'll hold onto me for dear life says, God, I'll get you out of any trouble. I'll give you the best of care. If you'll only get to know and trust me, call me and I'll answer be at your side at that in bad times, I'll rescue you. Then throw you a party. I'll give you a long life. I'll give you a long drink of salvation. So that Psalms 91 also is another way that it confirms all of these declarations that are in the new Testament about who God says we are. And if we're created in God's image, then everything that you know about God should be a new revelation about yourself. How deep is that? Think about that. If we're made in God's perfect image, then every new revelation we have about God, our father should be a new revelation about who we are.

We're made in his image sisters. So if we're made in his image, then every revelation I have about him is about me. It's about you. So I want you to be encouraged today. I want you, if you have not done this exercise, I plead with you. I challenge you to write down the declarations about the I AMS that God says about you. And if you need to start in place, start in Ephesians, write down those declarations that God says about you and read them out loud before your feet hit the floor every single day, just do it for the next 30 days. And then I dare you to come back to me and say that you don't feel more empowered. You don't feel more strengthened. You don't feel more, uh, than a conqueror. So sisters, I always say, encourage you to go read the word in whatever translation it is that you read from, uh, in John, one, one, it says in the beginning was the word and the word was with God.

And the word was God. So that's why, when I'm referring to Ephesians, for example, I know that Paul wrote the letter to Ephesians and the words are from Paul, but I read from scripture. And so when I look at the word, the truth, uh, that's from God in the Bible. When I'm saying in general, what God says about me, it's because I find it in scripture. And I believe that in the beginning was the word and the word was with God. And the word was God. So, um, but I always encourage you to just follow up and read and find yourself in the scripture, in whatever translation you want to use. I read several different translations just because different translations say things in different ways. So just wanting to clarify that and encourage you to find yourself in scripture, whatever translation you want to read, do it.

And again, I can't wait to hear some of the feedback from you guys. Once you guys have done this, make sure that you guys head over to my Facebook group, a wholly made life. You can find it on Facebook and just join the group and tell us what you found about yourself. Talk about this exercise. And let's walk through this thing together, because I know that if we read these declarations about what we find about ourselves in scripture, and we read these things out loud and we walk with the knowledge of who we are and who God is calling us to be that we will come out stronger for it. Our families will be blessed for it. The people in our circles will be blessed for it. You sister will be blessed for it. All right. So I will see you in the next episode and I hope to see you in the Facebook group as well. All right. See you soon. Okay.

 

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EP 15 Are You Hearing From God? Is the Holy Spirit Leading Your Steps in Your Life? For the Professional Working Mom Wife God-Led Business

EP 15 Are you Hearing from God? Is Holy Spirit Leading your in your Steps in Your Life?

So I think a lot of times when people that are in have not been as intentional, uh, or just don't really know how to hear from God or whether they're hearing, hearing from God, sometimes this feels a little bit, um, woo is the only word I can think of, although that's more like a new age word, but, uh, more, you know, all this high-level stuff that, you know, you think that you're going to hear this boisterous voice from the cloud saying, thus, say it the Lord. And you know, that's not exactly what I'm talking about. Now. There could be ways that people hear from God in that way, but I want to start with giving you a few tips on how you can start intentionally listening and hearing from God.

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Welcome back sisters to this episode of Wholly Made Life, where we're going to talk about the spiritual piece of our pie. We're going to talk about, are you hearing from God, are you letting the Holy spirit lead you in your daily steps? But before we get into some simple things that you can do to really hear from God and really focus on those steps that are led by the Holy spirit, I want to let you know that this episode is sponsored by a company that I love. I have gotten several daily planners from these guys and, um, devotionals, uh, and they, right now, they are launching an Easter devotional and I highly recommend it. I just got mine in the mail. I have a $10 off coupon for you, if you would like to go and take a look, they are amazing. It's amazing quality.

I've actually purchased a couple planners for some of my friends for Christmas, and they absolutely love them. It is really aligned with the message that I talk about as far as having a wholly made life.  These devotionals, that daily planners really help to keep you focused and in a very intentional and deliberate way on the Holy spirit on God and on who it is, you are meant to become the soap devotionals that they have on their site that you'll see have different focuses that you can focus on, like rest leadership, trust, surrendering. Those are just some examples, but it helps the prompts help you focus on something for the day for the week, and you can use it however you want to use it, but it does help you focus on who it is that you are intentionally trying to become based on who you feel you're called to be.

Uh, so this is Easter devotional, like I said, it's just now being launched! Go to https://devotional.atrogers.com. Once again, https://devotional.atrogers.com.. That's how you can get your $10 off. All right. So let's get into today's episode where we're going to talk about, are you hearing from God? 

So the very first thing you want to think about is your relationship with God. Just think about if you will, your best friend, think about how you interact with your best friend, how you interact with someone who is, uh, a trusted person in your life. Maybe it's your husband. Maybe it's a really good friend. Maybe it's a pastor. Uh, maybe it's a teacher. So someone that you have a very trusted relationship with, think about how you talk to that person, how it's just real and genuine. Someone, someone that you feel comfortable with, someone that you feel like you can tell some of your secrets to, uh, you can process some of those feelings and thoughts with that. You can't always process with someone else, well, relationship in which you feel comfortable and safe sharing. Well, that's the same thing that God wants with us sisters.

That's what he wants with us. He wants us to have a relationship with him in much the same way, where we feel safe with him and comfortable. And we feel trusting enough to share all of our feelings, our fears, our doubts, our questions, our angers, uh, everything that we might talk about with a friend. He wants us to have that same conversation with him. So you think about these relationships that you've had that are trusting and that are really good, safe relationships. They're ongoing. If you're thinking about your best friend or your husband, you wouldn't think twice about picking up the phone and calling that person and letting them know, Oh my gosh, just guess what happened to me today? Here's what it is. And you just wouldn't second thought that at all right? You wouldn't give a second thought to that. So the same thing needs to happen with God.

So the same things that you're wanting to talk to your girlfriend about, or your husband about, um, those are the things that you want to talk to God about. And yes, it's different because that person is not right there on the other end of the phone or in physical sense. But God's there all the time and his relationship with you. He wants it to be ongoing. He wants it to be intimate. He wants you to talk to him. And the only way, if you think about it, the only way that you can hear from someone is to talk to them. Okay? Now certainly we can write letters, which you can do when you journal. Uh, you can pray all of those things, but if you want to hear from someone, you gotta be having a conversation. Okay. And you also have to stop talking long enough to listen.

So that's the other key. Talk to God on a daily basis, make it an ongoing relationship and talk to him just like you would anybody else. And also, uh, stop talking long enough to listen to what he might be saying to you. So that's one number one. Talk to him. Number two, sit still and listen. And I'll talk a little bit further in a little bit about how you can listen, because it might not just be with your ears. Okay? So the second thing I want you to think about, so you're going to talk and you're going to listen. The second thing I want to talk to you about is, think about what your motive is. Why do you want to hear from God? What is it that you are yearning for? Is it relationship? Is it just to be close to him just to know that he's present with you at all times, or is it only when you need something from him?

When you're asking something from him, think about your friendships and your, your spouse soul relationship. Again, if you're only going to those people, when you need something, that relationship is not real reciprocal. Is it? You don't just call your friends when you need something from them. Do you? Because if you're just always going to your friend, when you need something, then that friend doesn't really receive anything from you and God wants to receive from you too. He doesn't want you just to come to him when you need something, he wants to receive your love, your presence, your acknowledgement, your thanks, your praise. Um, just like your friend would, you know, your friend wants you to call just to check on her sometimes. Hey, how are you? How was your week? How's your mother,

Those kinds of, uh, reasons

To your friends. And of course the relationship with her husband certainly has to be reciprocal. You have to have a two-way relationship. And so God wants the same thing. So think about when you're thinking, man, I want to hear from God. Is it only in those times that you need something for him, from him, or you need an answer or you don't know the answer. So you're wanting him to give you the answer or is it an ongoing relationship? That's two way you talk to him, whether you want something or not, you talk to him and give him praise and thanks every day, whether you want something or not, or whether you need something or not. Okay. So think about it that way. Think about the relationship that you have with him as being this two way reciprocal relationship. The next thing is, are you willing to really hear from him?

What if you hear from him, something that makes you uncomfortable or that challenges you in some way, are you really willing to, when you do hear something from him to be obedient and do what it is he's asking you to do, that is something that I think is even more challenging than just having that daily conversation with him. When you finally do hear something that is challenging or outside of your comfort zone, what are you going to do with that? So I would recommend that you pray for strength and wisdom and discernment, and you asked for the ability to be obedient enough and strong, bold enough, courageous enough to when you hear him. And it's not exactly what you thought it would be to be bold and courageous enough to take that step. Recently, one of the very most challenging things that I have ever, ever heard from God was to resign my position as chief nursing officer.

Now, this is a longer story than what I had time for here on this episode. And I'll probably do kind of a second part to this so that you can hear the whole thing originally. I was just feeling restless and I really loved leading and building my team in my nursing environment. I really loved that. That's my favorite thing. I love building teams and helping people grow. I just felt restless for some reason, though. It started a while back, but it's something that I just didn't really pay attention to. I actually intentionally kind of pushed it back. They ignored it. And as those feelings got stronger and as I continue to have my relationship with God, I talked to him about, I started to ask him, why am I feeling like this? Why am I feeling so restless? I started to hear from him in different ways when I actually heard the loudest was when I was forced to be the stillest and the quietest that I've ever had to be in my life.

So in July, late July, I was diagnosed with COVID. When I was diagnosed with COVID, I of course had to quarantine and I had to be in my room. I could not be a mom. I could not be a wife. I could not serve in my church. I could not work. And I have worked all of my life since I was 14. I have worked, I have had a job. And until I became a director in a nursing position, I had two or three jobs. I just worked. That's what I knew. That's what I did. It's part of my outward explanation of who I am and seeking that worthiness. That's what I did for just so long of my life. My success at work was something that made me feel worthy. And so when these things were stripped away from me where I couldn't be mom, I couldn't be wife.

Couldn't serve in my church. I could, there were no sports going on. Um, and then I couldn't work. I couldn't lead. I couldn't fix systems. I couldn't answer questions. I mean, I was completely cut off. I had no computer access. I was no longer on call 24 seven. I was just left with myself. And so I was forced to be the most still and the most quiet that I've ever been in my life. Now, granted, I was sick for about two weeks. And so I just slept and rested. You know, it's funny how sometimes God will use those times. Not that he caused this, but he uses it for our good, he works all things together for our good, so I was resting and finally really focused on taking care of myself so that I could get better. And I wasn't tasked with taking care of anyone else.

And so what came from that was me thinking about, and I believe it was God asking me, who are you now? You're not just a mom. You're not just a wife. You don't just serve in your church. And you're not just a chief nursing officer. You're not just your title, your position, your salary. And so when he started asking me those questions, when he said, I know who you're not, but not who you are. I was dumbfounded because I didn't know who I was either. Now I've been on this journey of unbecoming for years, I'm becoming perfectionism. I'm becoming, uh, this little girl who felt so unworthy and who hated her body hated the way she looked and didn't feel like she ever compared or matched up to other people. I have been unbecoming all of those things and doing the work too, to really understand who it is that God says I am.

And so I've been diving into that word and repeating that there was a season where I wrote down everything I found in the Bible that God said that I am, and I wrote it down and I would read it. And I would say it out loud every single day. I did that for probably about a year so that I could be reminded of who it is. God says I am. But when he asked me that, I don't know, I know who you're not, but not who you are not because he doesn't know who I am, but because I still was finding myself in the titles and the positions and the tasks of what I do versus who I am. That's an example of what God has said to me that has challenged me to take some steps that were bold and creative courageous, because what that came down to was after now that didn't happen overnight.

Okay. That happened over a period of we're talking. I was restless for months, probably over a year. Life happened as things happen. And then as COVID hit and everything was stripped away, that's when it just got so loud, I could no longer ignore it. And there were a lot of other things that happen during this timeframe that really kind of solidified for me what it is I need to do to refocus my life at this time. It doesn't mean that I won't go back to doing what I was doing before. I will do it differently when, and if I go back saying, he said, leave it forever. But for this time and season, he was asking me to trust him and give up everything that I had worked for as an offering to him, my title, my position. I mean, I studied a long time to become a nurse.

So I then a lot of time and money, blood and sweat and tears, uh, getting to where I was as a chief nursing officer. I mean, for the long time, I had thought that my path was going to be chief nursing officer to chief operations. Uh, and then to chief executive officer, you know, he said to me, I will bless you and I will favor you as I always have, because you're my daughter. And I love you. And I've given you these gifts, okay? But this is not the path that I have for you right now in this season. And I have more, I will show you, but you have to trust me with the two things you've never trusted me with before. And that is your finances and the control of what's next. As I said, I've been working since I was 14. I have never ever quit a job without knowing what's next, in fact, without a promotion.

So I have never quit a job without a promotion. I have always taken a next position based on a promotion that I was giving. And of course those promotions, except for one time always came with a salary raise. And so I was at the highest peak that I had ever been financially. And the other piece to that is that our financial household, my husband works full time, but we're at the point where we need both of our salaries. We've got three kids in private school. Uh, Clayton had just started college. So that's a college tuition. And we have our house that we got. Uh, we were blessed with, that's a whole nother blessing story, cause we should not have qualified for this house that we're in. Um, but we have our house, we have our two cars, you know, so we've got bills that we have to pay.

And I have always felt because I was the oldest child because I had to take care of some things. I just have always felt the burden to carry that, um, to carry my part, at least to carry my part, to make sure that we're okay. And with that comes my own trust in myself and my works versus trusting that God knows, and God has plans and God will provide. And so I had never given that to him, the most sacrificial offering I could give would be my title, which meant so much to me because of all the outward achievements that I I strived for throughout my life. So the title and the position itself meant something to me because I made it mean something to me. I made it mean something that was a worldly, something, not a biblical, something like that's pretty cool. When you say you're a chief nurse of something in this world, but that doesn't mean anything in heaven.

You know? So it was this sacrificial offering of giving him my title and position, but also the finances then thirdly, was the control, the lack of control, then not knowing, okay, God, if I take this step and I resigned my position without knowing what's next, that makes me crazy. Like I don't, that was the hard, hard, hard thing. I mean, I don't do those kinds of things. Um, so after lots of prayer and after lots of confirmations, I finally decided to take that step and resign. Okay. So let's get back to our goal of wanting to hear from God. One of our, instead of our goal being, you just want to hear from God, you need something. It should be about developing that mature spiritual relationship with God, a daily ongoing conversation that happens as you do this, he will reveal to you in ways that you can hear and notice.

So the question becomes, how do you hear from him? How do you hear, how is it when you hear me saying, Oh, I heard God say, was it aloud, audible voice? Was it like thunder and lightning? Well, it wasn't. So there's some different ways that you can hear. Some people do hear a loud audible voice at times. Uh, some people see it in dreams. Some people have visions. Some people say they see angels or have an encounter with an angel. Some people say that they experience a miraculous event. A lot of the times what happens is that they come in your own thoughts. The thoughts that you get are sometimes the way that God speaks to you. I remember we were on a trip with my pastor and she was preaching at a small church. And I remember asking her because she's very prophetic. I remember asking her, how do you know if you're hearing from God?

And I explained to her a situation where I was getting ready to pray for someone. And I got a thought in my head that said, pray for this girl. She's sad. She's in some darkness, she needs to know the light of the Lord. Um, and so those were thoughts that were in my head about a girl that I didn't know. I just felt drawn to her. And I felt, and I, and I kept thinking, she's depressed. She's sad. She needs some joy. She needs a, you need to pray that joy is restored for her. So I went ahead and I was obedient to that, to those thoughts. And I went up to her and I talked to her and I prayed using the words that the thoughts were bringing to my head about restoring joy and light and finding small things that she can rejoice in.

And, you know, I don't even remember everything. And that's the thing when you, when you're obedient, sometimes when you pray for someone, it's not really your words, it's just whatever the words are that that person needed to hear. So it was just a thought in my head and it was a feeling and a knowing a draw, a pole. And so I talked to my pastor about that. She said, yeah, that's how you're hearing from him. Just lean into that and practice listening and being more intentional and being obedient when you hear those thoughts. So you're, you're not hearing with your ears, you're, you're having a thought. And then you're having a feeling of knowing or a pulling or a drawing that you need to be obedient to this. You need to do this. It's the same thing when I'm like my child, my youngest Bryson, when we're driving.

And if there's someone that's on the side of the street and they, maybe they have a sign for something. And he says, mom, I think I want to give him my McDonald's or whatever that is him following what the Holy Spirit's nudging him to do. And does he get that every single time? No, he doesn't. So that's how you know that it's, it's a drawing. It's a, it's a, it's a way to hear from the Lord. It's a way to hear from God from the Holy spirit, nudging you to do something that feels a little bit uncomfortable sometimes. Okay. So there's a knowing, there's a feeling there's a thought, and there's a piece about that. And the more you listen and have conversations with God, the more you start to have these thoughts. And then for me, the thoughts then start to get confirmed. Now, some of those thoughts like this one, when I'm talking about praying for this girl that just happened.

And so I was obedient and I did it, but there were other thoughts such as the one that I need to resign my position that took me months to be brave and bold enough to gain the courage to do. But through those months, as I continue to have the daily conversations with him about, are you really asking me to do this? Like this doesn't make any sense. I am scared. I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to take a step without knowing the step I'm taking, but that's the whole point of faith, right? And trust. And that's the whole point of what he's asking us to do. So that's the other thing is that, you know, if the thoughts that are coming to you that are continually, repeatingly coming to you and even being confirmed in other ways, if those are in alignment with what the word of God says, then you can trust that that is God leading you.

So, you know, I did a lot of digging and it about faith and trust and, you know, handing things up to him and those all confirming alignment with what it is, was he was asking me to do it, think about this. This goes back to what we've talked about in other episodes, as far as thoughts go, uh, because we've talked about how we need to be intentional and deliberate about our thought life and making sure that what we're feeding our right mind is as much as possible in alignment with the word of God, because the more that we're in alignment, the better we can hear and recognize when he's trying to speak to us, reading the word is another way to, um, not only get closer to him and build more relationship with him, but also to confirm the thoughts that are coming to your mind, study the word, had these thoughts, and they were confirming the thoughts to be in alignment with the word.

If you're not clear on something, if you feel like you've had these thoughts and you're in the word and they feel in alignment, and you're not clear yet, you can ask God, just ask him, say, God, make this clear for me. Give me a confirmation, help me feel at peace with what it is that I feel like you're telling me to do. Based on the thoughts that I continue to have another example for me, as far as confirmation was, once I had gotten to the place where I decided, okay, I'm going to resign the day that I went in, I was returning from actually taking my son to Arizona to drop him off for college. I was returning from that time being off, I went to work in the first person that I spoke with came and she gave me a birthday present. And my, my birthday had been about a month prior.

She just hadn't gotten it yet. And she says to me, God told me that you needed this. And it was a plaque with some scripture on it that said, and I don't have it in front of me right now, but basically trust me without borders, spirit lead me where there's no borders to the trust. And there's a song for that too. So I'm sure you guys are, some of you are remembering what that song is, but it was about trusting him when there are no borders. And immediately I knew I had made the right decision and I went in and I gave my resignation that day. Uh, now I gave them notice and such, you know, I did the right thing. I had already known in my heart that I needed to do that, but I was still scared and I was still nervous about doing it.

But when she came to me and she says to me, God told me you needed this. And so this is what I got for you. It was a plaque talking about trusting him when there are no borders where I don't know where I'm walking now that was straight confirmation. And so immediately I lost it. I started crying. And of course she was like, I don't know why you needed this, but, and I said, well, I do. I know that's an example of a confirmation that might come outside of your thoughts. Maybe it's a song that pops on the radio. Maybe it's something one of your kids says to you. My kids confirm things for me all the time and they don't know what they're doing. God knows, you know, he's leading them. It's just one of those things where once you get to a point where you are hearing those things, you will get those confirmations.

And then as you mature in that relationship and you start to lean in and be more obedient, you will hear from him and feel more solid in those things. Feel more at peace without needing all of the additional confirmations. We've talked through this thing about hearing from God, and it's about, uh, building the relationship. Okay? Let's just recap. You want to build that relationship with him. You want to talk to him every day. You want to be in his word every day. You want to have an ongoing conversation with him, just like you would with your friend or your spouse. You want to make sure that that continues whether you need something or not. And you want to assess whether or not you're really ready to hear from him because he'll only give us what we are ready to hear. Like if he had told me that five years ago, honey, that would not happen.

I was not mature enough for that. I wasn't ready for that. So I don't want people looking or hearing this from me thinking, Oh my gosh, she's so grateful. But no, listen, I just wasn't mature enough in the past to hear about this. So it comes with maturity. It comes with your walk, your constant walk, your ongoing walk. And I'm still walking this thing out every single day. There's days that I throw my hands up. And I'm like, I have no idea what I'm doing. I have no idea. I don't know what's next. What are you going to show me? What's next? Okay. So it's a relationship. It's an ongoing relationship. Okay. And it's a trust that I am listening and I am doing everything I can to be as obedient as I can. Anytime. I feel like I'm hearing the next step from, from him.

Uh, and by the way, this podcast was one of those steps. And it's weird to think about, Oh, God told me to start a podcast, but the podcast just kept popping up and popping up. And there were lots of different confirmations along the way that made me realize, okay, start a podcast. And the same thing was I don't, what do you want me to start a podcast about? I don't know what to talk the talk about. Um, but you know, I just am obedient and whatever, he I'm trying to follow what he leads me to talk about. Relationship, making sure that your motive is good and that you're wanting to him to be present and just be real in your life. Uh, being willing to, when you do here, take those bold and courageous steps that he's asking you to take using wisdom and discernment and the word, okay.

You, you have to be responsible and use wisdom and discernment. That was my prayer for months. Let me have the wisdom and discernment to make a decision that impacts my family financially. Um, ultimately for me, it was the right decision and he is providing, you know, that might not be what he's asking you to do. So you just have to know what he's asking you to do and use wisdom and discernment in that. Um, making sure that what it is that the thoughts that are coming into your head or what it is you feel like you're hearing is in alignment with the word. And, uh, then making sure that you're intentional to sit still and listen, and then be obedient when you hear it. The last thing is to write things down. He has been urging me to write it down, write it down, write it down, everything.

So when you feel like you're hearing from him, maybe it's a daily journal. Maybe it's using a devotional and you're journaling in that daily devotional, but write things down so that you can keep track of what it is you feel like you're hearing from him. You know, if you've got these thoughts, come into your mind that you feel like, uh, you know, Holy spirit is that you then write it down and you can go back and you can see a pattern. You can see a record of the seasons that he's brought you through. Maybe it's a walk through maturity spiritually. So make sure that you write it down. We will see you on the next episode.

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EP 14 Fixing the Foundation of Your Wholly Made Life- Strengthening the Areas of your Life and Get Rid of the Guilt Overwhelm Burn Out! Time to take back your Life Mama, Wife, Sister, Friend!

EP 14 Fixing the Foundation of Your Wholly Made Life- Strengthening the Areas (Pieces of your pie) of Your Life

She said something that just caught me. And it reminded me of you guys because of what we talk about in taking bold and courageous action. So she was actually doing an Instagram live, talking about an encounter with God that she had when she was a child. And the reason she chose to do it online was because she knew that she may lose courage to post it. If she just recorded it for lots of reasons. But sometimes when you're sharing your faith or sharing personal counters, that you've had those things aren't always received as you intended them to be received or meant them, or sometimes they're just not received in a way, because some people that may be hearing it may have not had that kind of encounter don't understand it, whatever it is that causes those fears and doubts to creep up in our minds, when we are getting ready to share something that may feel a little different, a peculiar, a little odd to others, those spheres and doubts.

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Yes. I always love Fridays and it means something so much different to me now than it did a couple of months ago, but I still love Fridays mostly because I know that Dwayne's going to be off work and we're all going to be home together and still navigating this whole COVID quarantine type stuff with no organized sports that any of my boys are in and stuff. It just, and now that it's snowing outside and really bitter cold, I know that we're just going to spend time in the house together. And it's just such, it's just a much more enjoyable time than it used to be because of my situation right now. So anyway, but it's been such a long week. I know I was able to post that bonus episode for you guys, which was like just five minutes long, but I was so excited to get into this series that I talked about on Monday.

So we're going to get into the initial part of this series, but I wanted to, um, first just tell you a little bit about my week and something else I just listened to by somebody that's so special to me, I just found it so encouraging. And I wanted to make sure that I shared it with you guys too. But so this week I was actually traveling. I traveled to Chattanooga, which is only about four and a half hours away. Um, and I did that because part of a process that I started several months ago was going through, I've been working with a entrepreneurial coach. And part of that work that we're doing is franchise discoveries and working through just finding out about different opportunities that match my personality and my skill sets, my history, uh, my interests, my passions, what I feel, my mission is all of these things.

And so it's just been part of this whole discovery process that I've been in in these past few months, but I was in Chattanooga and it's amazing. And you know, you sign a whole bunch of agreements, not to share a whole bunch as far as what it is and the things about it, but it's a pretty amazing one. Anyway, that was really fun. I met a lot of great people. I saw a lot of kids lives being impacted, so it was pretty cool. So I, while I was gone, I wasn't able to record just because it ended up, I took everything with me. I was, I was so set on getting the recording up for this week and getting a, what I call batching, getting several of the next episodes done while I was there at the hotel by myself. But our day was so packed and I was just exhausted.

So I did not get to do what I had planned to do a simple, because I didn't realize how much time in the day that was going to take. And then my other two days, the Tuesday and Thursday were mostly traveling about four and a half to five hours. So, uh, and then I had a meeting at the church last night, which was really good. So anyway, that has been my week and now I come to Friday and I just got off an awesome mastermind call with a group of friends, uh, sisters that I'm getting to know. And they're also amazing. Uh, but I just, before I get into it, I wanted to share my friend, her name's Tammi. She has an Instagram page and I'm going to pull it up for you guys. Uh, it's called chasing time and drinking wine. And she that's her Instagram page, but she said something, it just popped up in my feed as I was going to actually post some stories.  Check it out here: https://www.instagram.com/chasingtimeanddrinkingwine/

Sometimes that creep up sometimes make us not follow through with something that we said to do. So it just hit me. Number one, I love her. So this is my sisters, my bio sisters. Okay. Her husband's brother's wife, her name's Tammi. She's amazing. I love her. She's my sister. I call her SIS because, um, you know, there's so many of the brothers and sisters on Brian's side, my brother-in-law and I love all of them. They're just, they're an amazing family. So anyway, I love Tammi and, uh, she just touched my heart. I mean, she had me crying. It's about 13 minutes, but it's an amazing story. So you got to go check her out and it's chasing time and drinking wine and I'll I'll connect, uh, something to her page in my show notes, in case you want to take a listen, but it was an amazing story of just the way God shows up in our lives so differently.

He loves us each so much. And he shows up in such different ways. I mean, it reminded me too of, you know, my son, my oldest son, Clayton is 18. And when he was about four years old, he, we were in our old house and he, Dwayne, my husband was working and he ran up to me. It was a Sunday morning. He ran up to me and he was so elated, like so excited. And he said, mom, mom, mom, we got to go to church. We got to go to church. And this was when we really weren't going to a church. We really weren't involved in anything. And I asked him, I said, okay, well, what makes you say that? Uh, we were, I still had him in public schools at the time. Um, and he said, I just saw the feet of Jesus. And he told me, go tell your mom that it's time to go to church.

And he was four. So there's things like that that happened that you just can't explain. But when you really think about all the different things that have happened in your life and the connections with people that he's made, everything is so divinely set up. That's what I believe I can look back and look at every circumstance and see, when you look back how that circumstance pointed you or got you to the next thing. So anyway, I don't know why I felt like I needed to hop on here and talk about that because my intention is to talk about getting us into how we're going to fix the foundation of our Holy made life. W H O L L Y and H O L Y, by the way, there's a little play on words there. And that's purposeful back to what Tammi was saying. The reason she hopped on that life is because she knew that she fear or doubt might stop her from sharing that story.

And it was an awesome story. I'm not going to tell you what it is because I want you to go listen to it and go find her. She's such an amazing soul. I love her Tammi, if you're listening, I love you, babe. It just, again, reminded me of you guys, because I think that the way that we step into who it is that we're called to be who it is we're being asked to become on a daily best, uh, basis, is to take the bold courageous steps, one bold courageous step at a time. That's it sisters, that's it one bold courageous step at a time that we can't take back. And we're intentional. And we've talked about this, you know, in my accountability series, if you haven't listened to those episodes, jumped back in the, up in the beginning episodes and listen to the accountability series.

But it's about being deliberate and intentional in what it is we're doing and saying, and trying to be intentional about what it is we're thinking about and what feelings and emotions that causes, and then what actions we're taking as a result of those things. So that our outcome, when we look at our life, make sense to us. And we have a say in it, ownership of that. So sisters, we're going to talk about fixing the foundation of your Holy made life. And I know I introduced this on Monday, but I want it to get a little bit deeper in and how we're going to navigate this over the next few weeks and going through the pieces of your, uh, life wheel or your purpose pie, or, uh, so here's the thing, guys. Um, email me, if you have an idea on what you want me to call this thing, uh, I talk about it as I I'm very visual, so I have to see it on paper to see it in my mind.

So I think about a wheel and I think about a pie because as we look at this pie, or even like a spokes of a wheel, you split it up into six different areas. We talked about what those areas are, the person, the personal piece, the spiritual, physical, relational, professional, and financial. Those are the pieces of your Wholly made life. Those are the pieces of your Holy made pie, okay. Or the wheel that wheel of life. So if you have a fun way to name that, like purpose pie or Holy life wheel, um, you know, those aren't like super fun, but it kind of gives you an idea of what I'm talking about. I want to talk a little bit about how we are going to walk through my system for strengthening each piece of that pie, each spoke on that wheel so that you are stronger and strengthened and more confident in each area of your life so that you can feel whole, most people may know, but maybe you don't that I'm a nurse and I've been a nurse for over 20 years.  20 years, 2005, 21. So no, not quite. Um, but I've been in mental health for since 98. And I've been a nurse since 2005. So there we go. There's Beth. But for a long time, I feel like, and I've done a lot of different things. I started off in nursing with the neonates. So the NICU babies, my favorite favorite, favorite favorite, because I got to deal with the little babies and some of these babies, you guys were the size of my hand. Like that's not a joke when you see or hear about babies in the NICU, those 21 or 22 weaker those micro preemies, they are literally smaller than the Palm of my hand. And I have small hands impacted. That was so great to be a part of obviously saving and taking care of these babies. And it was one day at a time taking care of these babies as they grew, you strong enough, their lungs grew strong enough. Their bellies grew strong and They grew strong enough to come off of their oxygen and, uh, start to try bottles, uh, and be able to tolerate being held on their mother's chest. The best part of that was working with the mamas and the dads of course, too, but helping be that face for that mama who couldn't do what she was designed to do once that baby was born to be the face that she came into every day and said, how's my baby boy doing? And you being able to tell her the hard stuff and the great stuff and the triumphs, and even being with mamas who, whose babies didn't have the outcomes that they had hoped walking through that with them was such an impact on my life. Like that was literally my favorite bedside nursing, because I got to care for the babies and the families, especially the mamas.

That's why my heart, I think too, that I love that so much because my heart is with mamas. You know, I think that we are amazing, amazing creatures and something that we're designed to do, which is to, to walk in through this motherhood is such a gift and we need our sisterhood to help us walk through that. So anyway, I don't even know where I got, Oh, I do. Um, the other thing that I've done, I did some pediatrics and home health. I mean, I've done everything in hospital settings and sense of care. I done, uh, on the floor, nursing med, surge nursing, um, or the Predix, uh, I wasn't even on a HEMOC floor. So blood and cancer disorders, but my favorite was NICU. And then also psych and behavioral health. And the reason I love psych and behavioral health, if you can't tell, I am way, way, way into my own personal self-awareness so that I can create the outcomes with the help of the Holy spirit.

Of course, anything I ever say, you got to know that my belief is that it all comes from God, like my strengths, uh, you know, all of that comes from God, but so just that caveat there, but the, I love being more self-aware of what I can do to grow so that I'm a better person for other people. And then behavioral health, you either get that or you don't, if you're gonna get it, behavioral health is a place to do it because you are the skill, you are the tool, um, you, it's not like, okay, you got to get a straight cath on somebody. It's definitely one, two, three, and you just do a skill. You are the skill. So if in, if you get an undesired outcome, when you're dealing with this person, with this behavior, then you have the only thing you can control is going back and looking at yourself to say, okay, did I assess that correct correctly?

Did I understand that person correctly is what I did or said, or how I stood? Did that help or hurt the situation? What can I do differently to get a different outcome next time? So it's just a great place to be, to understand yourself and understand that everything you do and say how you stand, how you hold your body, everything you do and say impacts the other person that you're involved with. So that goes back to that whole accountability series, too. The more aware we can be at that, the better outcomes we get, because we start taking responsibility and ownership of what we can do to create a better outcome for ourselves and for others in our life. So being a nurse you're trained to be holistic. You want to look at that whole person. So I'm not just looking at a I'm looking at what's going on with that person physically, how does that person feel what's happening in their finances?

Can they afford their medications? Do they have a home to go to, do they have a parent here? Uh, are they getting along with their husband? Um, what school do they go to? What kind of education, educational opportunities or background do they have? You're looking at the entire thing. So it's a holistic approach, which is why I approach the, uh, the Holy made life assessment and the Holy made life wheel or pie holistically. I want us to be whole complete, nothing broken, nothing missing. I want us to be whole, which means that we have to feel that balance. We have to have those boundaries in every single piece of our lives. Every all of those six areas that we're talking about, the personal, the spiritual, the physical, the relational, the professional, and the financial. If all of those things are not in order, then we are not walking through our life feeling Holy made, feeling whole complete.

And so that's the work that each of us are called to do. And that's the work I'm here to help you with. That's the work that I help coach women with is how can we look at our lives and see where it is that we can put some attention into or put some actionable goals into so that we can bring that back to a more balanced place where each piece of that pie is fulfilled and you are able to walk every day feeling whole. And it's not to say some of those things don't fluctuate at certain times, because absolutely they do. If you're starting up a new business, then you're going to have more time spent more actionable steps in that professional, but the relational and the physical and the spiritual and the personal and the financial pieces touch that. So you have to then make adjustments in those other areas so that you don't fall completely out of whack.

And that's one of those things that I have worked on to come out of, especially related to that professional piece is making some different choices so that I don't get into that situation where I was so unbalanced, where everything I had was being spent in that professional pie, a piece and everything else behind that was suffering. Now, I will say that my last position I had, I was very high on the spiritual and the professional pieces. In fact, that's the first job that I really leaned into being very open with where the love that I have for people, the love that I have for nursing, the love that I have for leadership comes from, and that's from God. And I will say that is the most productive, the fastest growth in my team that I've ever seen. And the only thing that I did differently was be open with where the love that I have for what I do and who I serve comes from.

So there's something to be said about that. So here's what I want you to do. So we're going to talk about this, cause I want you to be set up and I talked about the assessment that you can take. And that's just really like a six question, uh, assessment, and it just gets your juices flowing. I talked about that in the last one. So you can do that by looking at my show notes and clicking the link that goes to the Holy made life assessment. Here's what I want you to do. I want you to draw a circle on a page, and this is where we get to your actionable steps. For this episode. I want you to draw a circle on the page, and I want you to split that circle into six pieces. So you're, you're looking at either a wheel with spokes or you are working, looking at a pie.

And so you have six different triangles. They're all the same size. They should be all the same length and same size, uh, so that they look pretty, even because if you're talking about a holistic approach to your life, a Holy made Holy life, you're going to have equal parts. And the goal is always going to be to try to keep it balanced and have an awareness if, and when things start to become unbalanced. So here's what I want you to do. I want you to write above each piece of your pie. So you have six pieces spiritual. The next one is physical. The next one is relational. Next one is professional. The next one is financial. And the final one is personal. I want you to write those above each piece. Okay. And then you have the middle where they all kind of join. Okay.

Now what I want you to do is I want you to just quickly look at each of those pieces and rate yourself and the way that I want you to do this visually is from the middle of the pie. I want you to start coloring in up to the top. If you feel like you are, let's say the spiritual. If you feel that you are way, way, way good on the spiritual piece, that you are doing everything that you know how to do, you're spending enough time with God. You're, you know, you, maybe you preach the word. Maybe you share the gospel, or maybe you do a daily devotional. You pray every day. You just feel very fulfilled. You would color that went all the way up to the top of the pie piece. So that whole pie piece would be colored colored in. Does that make sense?

Now, if you go to, let's say let's pick financial, let's say you've colored it up to the top or near the top. Okay. Now I would, if people that have worked for me know when we do evils every year in, let's say the scale is from one to five, my people know don't be giving yourself fives, because if you give yourself a five, you're telling me that you had zero room to improve. And I don't believe that any of us ever had any, um, a place in our life where we have zero room for improvement. So I would challenge you to, if you think that you're at the top, then, is there anything else that you could do to, to improve or is it over the top? Is your cup flowing so much over that it's taking away from another piece. Okay. So you might look at that and say, yeah, I'm at the top, but is there anything you can do differently or once you color in all of your pie, is it so unbalanced that you need to pull back a little bit on some of that?

Okay. So there's my, uh, leadership supervision, supervisory stuff coming out, because I'm always challenging people to grow no matter how great they are. Uh, and it doesn't mean that I never gave any fives because I did give some bias. But it certainly, when you are working on your own, uh, leadership in your life, in your areas of your life, it is helpful for you to always have that. Self-awareness of where, what can I do to grow more? So, okay. So let's go to financial for an example, let's say that when you think of financial, you don't feel satisfied. You don't feel like you're making enough money or you don't, you're not saving anything. Maybe you've got a great salary, but you're not saving anything. Or maybe you're not putting away what you want in retirement, or maybe you don't have a fund for emergencies saved.

You don't have a thousand bucks in a checking or savings account where if something happened, you could pull from that thousand bucks and you would have a plan to replace that. So things like that think about you, you know, what is your financial legacy? Are you building that? Do you, do your kids have something to grow on when, if something happened to you? So you would color in from the middle, again, out towards the top of the pie where you think you are with that. So I want you to do that and all of these sections and just real quick, so that you kind of get a feeling for, what are we thinking about in each section in case you need some clarification on what each section is. So we talked about spiritually, this is where are you with your relationship with God? Do you have a relationship with God or are maybe you are going to church every week, but you don't really feel like you're hearing from God, which is one of the things we're going to talk about is are you hearing from God in your life?

And how do you know that you're hearing from him? And are you letting the Holy spirit lead you at all? Do you feel those Holy spirit nudges those God winks are your steps in alignment with what you feel you're being called to do. Okay. So those are examples, spiritual, physical. How do you feel is that how you look in the mirror? How do you feel about how you look physically? How do you feel about your body? How do you feel about the movement that you're engaged in every day? I want in this section, because this is a big one for women and we know it. And this is one that, you know, in my, uh, previous episodes, I've talked about it. I've struggled with my body image for a lot of my life. I'm 44 years old, and it's been there for most of my life.

And it's 100%. The last thing that I focus on in the past, I want you to be real careful about that. Are these thoughts that you have or about yourself, or is this really factual in what you see? I want you to take it down as factual as you can. So physically, how much do you move in a day and what is the answer? So let's say you take a 10 minute walk every single day, then that's what you think about. And do you feel like that's enough for you? Okay. So are you meeting those goals that you have, have you set goals that you are meeting? And if you don't, then you have some room to grow that you're identifying. Now we will go deeper in this, in each of these sections as we discuss, but I'm just trying to give you some examples of what would be in each section relational.

You're going to think about your motherhood. Where are you with that? Your sisterhood or your friendships? Where are you with that? Maybe it's your church relationships, maybe your sir you're serving or volunteering. I like to call it serving, uh, because I don't feel like we're volunteers in the kingdom of God. I think that we're called to serve and love. But where are you with that? Do you feel good about those things or is there work that you feel like you need to do, uh, in your marriage? And if you're single, then you think about the other relationships that you have in your life. You're going to color in again from the middle towards the top of the pie on where you feel like you are relationally. I will tell you that for a long time, for many, many years, my relational was very low because I felt very uncomfortable with my performance and my time and energy that I had for my motherhood.

And especially my marriage professional is your career or what you do on a daily basis. If you are a stay at home, mom, and you are managing your household, your CEO of your household, then you can think about that job that you have to maintain your homestead and color in what it is you feel like you are doing in that piece of the pie. So count that in that piece of the pie, because, uh, hun that's, that's a hundred percent your CEO of your homestead. So think about it that way. Okay. And we talked a little bit about financial and then personal is going to be your self care. How are you personally taking care of yourself? That was always a very low one for me as well. This is where your mindset is, how much mindset work do you do? How much self-development work do you do?

And that might fall into spiritually because a lot of the self development work I do is related to biblical principles. I don't want you to get too woo here, but just think about, you know, are you taking care of yourself? Because you know, on an airplane, you cannot, if something starts to happen and something goes down, you cannot take care of anybody else. If you don't put that oxygen mask on yourself first. So that should be a balanced piece of your pie. And if it's not, then we got to talk about, you know, how we're going to strengthen that. And there's a solution, a resolution to all of this. I don't want anybody to color in these pieces and be like, man, my life is in shambles. Absolutely not. So this, this is why we do it though. This is putting it in front of us.

So now once we've identified this and you've got your pie, you've got your colored in and you see what the, the differences are in each triangle of that pie. Then what I want you to do. And this is something that you can take action on now is thinking about what one thing can you do in each of these sections of this part of these pies? What can you do today to make time? Hi, for each one of those categories? What can you do per week to do something? To help you get a little closer to the top in each one of those categories, this is about small actions, findable steps. And we'll talk about it more as I get into each individual piece of these pies. And some sections might have several episodes like the physical that one's going to have several episodes, for sure, because there's so much that goes into our physical bodies.

It's not just about the way we look it's about what we think it's about what we've learned. It's about movement. It's about choices. It's about food. It's about emotions. So that one's going to be several episodes. But what's one thing. If you look at your pie and you say, Oh wow, I am like, I'm super high on the spiritual and the financial. And I feel pretty good about the relational, but I, Whoa, this looks pretty low on the personal and the physical. So what are those, you know, you can do it like that. You can focus on the pieces of the pie that look lower to you. And the other thing I challenge you to do is if you feel like one is way towards the top, while others are down, then look at that piece and ask yourself, what is it about this piece of the pie that is so fun?

Why is this so full quickly? The example is like, when I looked at my professional, that was always full, um, so much so for me though. Yeah. And it was overflowing and it was taking up space from the other pieces of my pie. So it started to become damaging. So you have to assess like when I've colored in my PI several months ago, professional was way, way at the top. In fact, I wanted to color past the tippy top of the, of the pie piece, but my other places, most of them, at least four of them, relational, physical and personal three, at least three of them we're pretty low because, cause I didn't have enough time. I wasn't being intentional, intentional. That's not a word ladies. I wasn't being intentional about how to pour into these other pieces and also be successful in that professional career piece of my pie.

I wasn't being intentional about it. So if I'm not being intentional about it, there's a reason. And a benefit that comes from that. One of the things about behavior guys is that we behave in certain ways because we get certain benefits and I'll tell you, number one, the benefit I was getting in my professional and career slice of pie was the confidence and competence that I felt from what I did. I I'm an excellent leader. I, and I'm not saying that trying to brag, it's just a gift and it's so much so that I don't know what makes me good at what I do all the time. I mean, I've got people that I supervise back when I was a teenager that I will see or hear from every now and then. And they're like, you were the best boss I ever had. You were the best supervisor ever.

And it's like, I just, in fact, can you help me understand what I did differently or said differently than make you say something like that? Because sometimes guys, when we have gifts, we don't even know the gifts that we have. So that's the other thing we'll talk about as we go through this whole process of strengthening our pieces of our pie, we're going to identify with those strengths and those gifts are, and maybe it will help you see on paper, what the passions are that you've been given and what purpose is behind that passion and what you can do with it and why it's a gift and how you can use it. But those things, yes, if you allow them to, they can be overshadowing and take over and take away from other places in your life, which is what I was allowing to happen because I felt so confident and competent in what I was doing.

I would just, the truth is I'd rather be at work than have to come home and try to clean up a house where I feel very overwhelmed because it's such a huge mess and I just don't have the time or energy to clean it. And I don't even know where to start and I can't get the help that I need. You see how it goes into this whole big thing. In my mind, these are the thoughts that I'm having that are driving the behaviors and the actions that I'm taking. But that's why I was so comfortable. Just let me work 70 or 80 hours a week because honey, I know I'm good at that. And then I can also escape or avoid the things that I didn't feel like I was great at. Anyway, you see what I'm saying? It's about who we are and what gifts we've been given.

This process will help you. And this has gone like way longer than I wanted it to. So these are the way I want you to do, make your circle split into six sections, start coloring it in where you feel fulfilled and you feel like you're doing pretty well at, and then ask yourself questions about where you feel like you're either overflowing or too short. What is the one thing I can do or make time for in that category? And I want you to write it down. And then as we go through this process of strengthening these pieces, we will talk about how we can actually create an action plan to attain some of the goals that we're going to come out of. Just the awareness. Now, the way that you're looking at your life differently so that we can start to make it manageable. Okay.

That's the point we want to make it manageable so that we get some results because it's not going to matter if we don't get results. Okay. All right, sisters, hope that made sense. And like I said, if you guys have an idea of what to call this thing, the purpose pie, the whole life wheel series, you know, throw it in there, I'm open for it. You know, I'm not always that creative, but we are going to work on fixing the foundation of your Holy made life. We're going to work on, um, my systems for strengthening and uncovering each of those things piece by piece. We're going to talk about how you're hearing from God. We're going to talk about your motherhood. Uh, we're going to talk about your marriage. We're going to talk about in mind, you know, by the way, because I'm, I'm doing all these things too.

We're going to talk about money. We're going to talk about our physical, uh, our bodies. Um, we're going to talk about all of it. All right. So if you have any comments and if you want to take these short assessment, just to get your juices flowing about what questions would you ask yourself about each of these sections? Make sure you hit, hit that and link up in the show notes and we will see you on the next episode. And don't forget, I have a private Facebook group that is just building up a community that we can start to work on. Some of these things together. There's a lot of women in there that we can start to just bounce things off of each other because I promise you there's somebody in that group that if you are short on the financial section of your pie, there is somebody in that group that is amazing at that financial section. And they're going to give you some ideas for action steps. So let's get into community on this. Okay? All right, sisters have an amazing, amazing weekend.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women. Just like us. You're five stars in written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

Useful links:

• Take the quick "Wholly Made Life Assessment" here: com
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If you enjoyed this episode of the Wholly Made Life Podcast, then make sure to subscribe to the podcast, and don't forget to give Angie a review. You can also take a screenshot of the episode and tag Angie in your Insta and Facebook stories.

 

*some of the links provided may result in a small affiliate fee that allows me to continue to keep putting out this free content on this podcast*

EP 13 Is Perfect Timing Real? How I knew my Broken Arm, Pink Cast, Surgery was Perfect Timing: How to Make the Most of your Time- How to Bend Time for Busy Mom

EP 13: BONUS  What does a broken arm and a pink cast have to do with great timing? How to take advantage of timing. How to Bend Time for a Busy Mom

Hey friends. So what does a pink cast in a plate in my arm with seven screws have to do with great timing. That's what I'm going to let you know about. This was recorded back in 2015, when I had an injury and I wanted to share the information with you. So we'll see you on the inside. Let's dive in.

Hey guys, it's Angie Tonini- Rogers. So I have a message to share today because on Saturday Keysha Bass on prosperity mindset call. I was listening to a repeat of that. And on Sunday, pastor Ronnie Harrison preached this and Monday on the way to work, being on my Sirius XM radio channel, preached this yesterday on the way home preach this. So clearly I need to share this with someone else because someone else needs to hear this- because I am getting this message over and over and over…it's timing. And it's timing is everything. And it is stop comparing yourself to other people and where they are because you are in the right place at the right time. And as long as you continue to take action during that time that you're in, you will have your success. You will have your promise. You will, you will attain whatever goal it is that you are working on.

It will happen in the timing that it's supposed to happen. Not necessarily in the time and that you want it or you desire it. We don't always know what we ask for. Number one, we ask for it. But number two, sometimes we don't know the ramifications that will happen if we were to get that thing we're asking for right in that moment. So you have to understand that timing is everything and it will happen when it's supposed to happen. Quick story. What of my thing? You know, my, my broken arm here, I injured my cartilage in my wrist and it's called the TFCC. I ripped it a little bit. There was a micro tear in April. Well, it kind of, it healed enough; Or I adapted enough to where I could go back and start doing what I was doing before at work.

You can't work where I work with an injury just because it's not safe to do so. So it healed enough. And I adapted enough to where I could go back. Well in September it tour again. And then I was out and I was out from September until, uh, February. We did a lot of PT. We did a lot of OT, just a lot of different appointments to try to see if there's anything else that needs to be done before surgery got scheduled. Well, it ends up, I needed surgery. So in February on the sixth, I think I was scheduled for surgery while I'll get a call the week before saying the surgeon cannot do that, or it wasn't February six might have been the third. Anyway, it, it was. Um, and so then the surgeon called and said, we can't do it that date. So it ended up getting scheduled the day after I returned from my Atlanta trip.

And then I had the surgery, they had to actually break my ulnar bone and put a plate and seven screws in it. So I'm not a good experience at all, but nevertheless, an experience. So I had a cat, I had like a soft cast. And then I went on this Monday, not this Monday, but a Monday to get my cast, my hard cast, this cute little thing, but on, and then that, um, it just so happens that on that day there were some leadership changes that happened. And I was able to on Tuesday morning, get called in and asked, can I come and help on an interim basis, cover this position? Okay. New experience, new things that I knew, challenges for me and a new learning experience. And it is being spoken to all around me. So whether or not I need to share my testimony with you so that you know, that things will happen in their own time.

And sometimes things will happen that you don't expect to happen, or you think is a bad thing, but ended up being something that helps get you to the right thing. So for example, who wants a broken arm? Not me, but if that's what it took to slow me down. And if that's what it took to get me to this spot, then that's what needed to have happened. So don't worry about what's going on. As long as you are doing the right thing and doing what you know how to do, you're seeking assistance, you are seeking, learning, and growing. Then you're on the right track. So timing is everything. Remember that?

Hey friends, I hope you enjoy that episode on God's perfect timing. Even though things don't always work out the way we think it is always going to be perfect timing. Well, listen, how many of you guys have ever thought about starting your own podcast? Well, I just recently finished a course called podcast pro university done by Stephanie gas. She's an amazing podcast star and her class has everything you need to know in order to start your podcast from a to Z, check it out at http://ppu.atrogers.com. See you on the inside.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us. You're five stars and written really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some left. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

 

• Take the quick "Wholly Made Life Assessment" here: com

Resources:

• Connect with Angie on FB: angie.toninirogers FB
• Connect with Angie in her Facebook Community: Wholly Made Life Community Group
• Interested in learning how to start your own podcast? Take a look at this course to learn everything you need to know! ppu.atrogers.com

*some of the links provided may result in a small affiliate fee that allows me to continue to keep putting out this free content on this podcast*

EP 12 How Do I Balance My Life? Wholly Made Life Assessment How to Fix the Broken Pieces of Your Life and Come out Stronger. Become more productive in your life Mom

EP 12 How Do I Balance My Life? Wholly Made Life Assessment How to Fix the Broken Pieces of Your Life and Come out Stronger. Become more productive in your life Mom

Hey, welcome back ladies, and let's get ready because we are going to use this episode to set us up for preparation for our Wholly Made Life assessment. Let's get into it.

Useful links:

• Take the quick "Wholly Made Life Assessment" here
• Have a question or comment? Email Angie here: angietoninirogers@gmail.com
• Connect with Angie on FB: angie.toninirogers facebook
• Connect with Angie in her Facebook Community: Wholly Made Life- Discover Hope, Healing, Purpose Community Group

Welcome back to Wholly Made Life. This is Angie, Tonini- Rogers, and I am your host for the podcast. Some of you said you've been listening and we've just gotten through the accountability series, which was, um, I would say a pretty hard series to go through, but I really felt led to talk about some of those things because we're just in a season right now where I think God is calling us to rise up and be who it is. He's calling us to be, be a little bit more bold and courageous in our actions and be more intentional in what it is we're doing in our everyday life, so that he can prepare us to walk in the authority that he's given us to impact the circles that we are meant to impact. The next series that we're going to do is going to be related to your Holy made life.

So in the beginning in the trailer, and in the episode one, I talked a lot about the Holy made life assessment, the wheel or the pie of life. And we talked about different sections of your life that are important. The first being physical, and these are not in any particular order, but physical, personal, financial, spiritual, your relationships in your profession. So when I think about a wheel, um, let's talk about it as a wheel of life, or I've talked about it as pieces of your pie, because it looks like a pie. When I think about that, one of the things that I help women with is to really get a good grasp on where they are in their wheel of life, where they are in each piece of their pie, so that they can start to take some easy action steps. Well, simple action steps to become a little bit more balanced in that wheel of life or in those pieces of your pie. The physical just as a reminder, is your health and your wellness. It includes your mental and emotional health. The next one, personal includes your self-care, your self-development and your mindset. The accountability series was a lot working in that personal piece of our pie, that gaining more personal awareness and self-awareness and what we can do differently to start to get some different outcomes in our life and to impact our relationships in our life. More positively and more powerfully. Uh, financial includes basically, are you satisfied with where you

Are? Are you creating

The legacy that you want to create? Are you able to help the person in the grocery that doesn't have her wallet with her or scans her debit card and it gets declined if you're so moved to do that, would you be able to do that? The other big piece with financial is your money mindset. So what are your beliefs about money? So those are the things that you would think about when you're thinking about whether or not you feel like your financial piece of your pie is balanced. Okay. Spiritual that is related to your relationship with God. Where are you with that? How much time do you spend in a day? And it's not about the number of minutes or number of hours, but it's about the quality of the time that you're spending with God. If you're like me, I talked about this in one of the episodes recently was that I like to bend time.

So I have time every morning before my feet hit the floor. I had time that I'm talking to God and praying and thanking him and showing him my gratefulness for who he is in my life and how he has shown up. And quite frankly, if my feet hit the floor before I've done that, I feel a sense of guilt because I feel like I need to do that to start my day off so that I am prepared for whatever it is that happens once my feet hit the ground. So the other things to think about here is okay, back to how you've been time. So I've been time, meaning that I use the time that I already have, or already in doing something else. And I integrate my spiritual relationship with God into that. So for example, while I'm in the bathroom, washing my hands, I'm saying prayers, I'm talking to God while I'm in my car.

There's a lot of times I just turn everything off and I pray or I sing worship songs. That's another form of how you can ignite that spiritual part of you. Okay. So relationships, this includes your motherhood, your, or your parenting, your relationship with your husband. So your marriage, it could be your relationship with your, um, friends or coworkers. For me. When I looked at this piece of the pie, when I was working full time as the chief nursing officer, I was working so many hours a week that I was neglecting a lot of my relationships in my life. And I felt very unbalanced. So I felt very confident in my relationships with my coworkers, the time I was spending in that professional piece of my pie, which we'll get to next. But when I looked at my motherhood and my relationship with my husband and relationship with myself, which is back to personal and physical, those things were not balanced.

They were not balanced. Now at each time or at, in during seasons, you're going to fluctuate in some of these areas. There are going to be certain times that your profession might need to require more time than your personal or your, you know, you might spend more time spiritually growing than you do with your profession. Okay. There's times that this is going to ebb and flow, but in general, in order for us to really feel the intention of the joy that we've been given, be joyful in all areas of our life and really, truly live our Holy made life. We should be able to take small, simple steps every day to pour into the pieces of these pies, the physical, personal financial, spiritual, relational, and professional. There are small things that we can in each of those areas every day, so that we can feel more fulfilled in all of these areas of our life.

And so that's what this next series of your Holy made life assessment is going to be about. We're going to talk about each of these individual pieces of your pie or pieces spokes to the wheel. And we are going to come up with actionable steps that you can take on a daily basis to fill in those areas that you feel like you are a little unbalanced in the last one profession is obviously your career or your business, or if you're a stay at home, mom, it is your duties that you do every day to keep your household okay. Or if you're homeschooling, what I would like to do is make sure that you guys are prepared for, as we go into these next several episodes to discuss each of these pieces. And I have a wholly made life assessment that you can take. It's very simple.

It's very short. It's just to get you thinking. And then as we walk through each, each section over the next few weeks, we will elaborate on that assessment. So all that is is it will be in the show notes, you can click the link and fill out the form and give you guys some tips and some action steps that you can take. And by the way, if you need a little bit more assistance in some of these areas, that's what I do. I help coach women creating that Holy made life that they deserve using that assessment. And then we come up with actionable steps and the accountability is the piece that is helpful for most people. I think when you have that accountability partner to help you, not only see things maybe from a different perspective, but have someone that you know is going to follow up with you, and you're going to be accountable to related to the action steps that you have created.

That just makes a world of difference. I personally have actually, I have a couple coaches, I'm in a couple of group coaching programs, and I have a personal coach working with over the past several months. And that is because we all need to pour into ourselves and we need someone to check us. We need someone to help us see things that we may not be able to see in our own life. We not, we may not be able to perceive things in a way that someone on the outside could look in and confirm us on affirming us on and also call us out on, in a loving way. That's what I do. And I am happy to help you. If you want to find out more about that, then you can email me at Angie, tonyRogers@gmail.com. And that also is in the show notes. But the next few weeks, we're going to be talking about each of these sections and we will work together to come up with some actionable items that you can focus on in order to get yourself where you're feeling a little bit more fulfilled in whatever areas you feel.

You're a little unbalanced. And when you think about a wheel, if you know that a couple of spokes on the wheel are not quite touching the outer wheel, then that wheel is going to not function correctly. So when we're unbalanced in areas of our life, then other places start to fall. For example, when I was working, my energy was spent at work and I remained on call 24 seven. So even when I wasn't at work, my energy and attention and focus was still at work. And so it was impossible for me to really pour into the other areas of my life. Now, all of them had some, some things I was doing in each of those areas, but there were areas that were really low when you look at, um, how much time and how much fruit I was seeing in each of those areas, physicals and example my physical and self-care personal.

Now, I always deal with self-awareness and mindset. I'm always doing that. I had a 45 minute commute. And so I consistently listened to books. I listened to the Bible on tape. I did all of those things to continue to fill my mind and to continue to challenge me, to grow professionally personally, spiritually. So I'm pretty good at that for mindset. And that should never stop by the way. I think it's Tony Robbins, who said, if you stop growing, you die. I believe that wholeheartedly. I'm an avid learner. I love learning. And I love learning things about myself because I know that that's the one thing in this world I can control. And if I learn more about myself and then I can work to change in order to impact the people around me, more positively, I love learning about the things that I can do better.

I'm just kind of, maybe I'm a little weird like that, but anyway, so that's something I'm good at, but my physical health, that's the last thing I typically do. I typically am the type of person who will put everybody else first at the cost of myself. So like exercise, I, that would be the last thing on my list that I would even think about because I don't have time to do that because I'm doing everything else for everybody else. You know, my health, I recently started making some changes in my health, uh, trying to make better choices, to be a little bit more clean. Um, you know, the things I put on my skin, I want it to be a little more clean and natural and pure, so small things like that. But the big things like exercising and making sure that I am not eating fast food at 10 o'clock at night when I'm driving home from work, those kinds of things fall when you are so unbalanced in another area.

So that's just an example. Those are things we're going to talk about in the upcoming series. I'm pretty excited about it because there's, I think that sometimes it feels so overwhelming, but there are small things, simple things that we can do in each of these areas in order to make a huge impact. So we're just going to walk through some of those things together. Okay. Next episode, we will start to go through each of these pieces of your pie, the physical, personal financial, spiritual relationships and profession. In each episode, we'll focus on one of those areas. Okay. So if you want to prepare yourself, make sure you hop over there and take that assessment just so you can have it. And then I'll explain how you can put it into a pie chart so that you can visualize where it is your balance, because I think sometimes visualizing it makes it a little bit more manageable and actually I'll have a bonus episode. That'll get posted this week that was already recorded. I actually refurbished it. It's just about timing in being in the right seasons of timing in using the things that happen to us in a way that reminds us, that it's all in God's perfect timing. And even when things happen to us, that seem to be negative or are hardships. It's all in timing and it's all in preparation. We're always being prepared for something coming. So there's a bonus episode that you'll see this week as well. All right, sisters, are we ready?

Let's get ready. Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us. You're five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember, your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

 

Useful links:

• Take the quick "Wholly Made Life Assessment" here
• Have a question or comment? Email Angie here: angietoninirogers@gmail.com
• Connect with Angie on FB: angie.toninirogers facebook
• Connect with Angie in her Facebook Community: Wholly Made Life- Discover Hope, Healing, Purpose Community Group
• Interested in learning how to start your own podcast? Take a look at this course to learn everything you need to know! ppu.atrogers.com

Hey mama. Welcome to Wholly Made Life where I believe that you are not created to do just one thing in your life. Well, you are not just your job, your title or your salary. You're not just a mom or a white versus sister. You are fearfully and wonderfully made to lead in all areas of your whole life. Your life is like a pie that's made up of different pieces that create a complete circle and girl, you deserve to enjoy the whole pie. Hi, I'm Angie Tonini- Rogers and mama. I know you are really good at what you do in your profession or business, but if you're ready to stop ignoring different pieces of your pie and reclaim your whole life, then you are in the right place. Girl, let's tap into the whole life. God has for you and experienced that God sized fulfilled life together. We're going to walk through some boundaries, leadership mindset and restoration in different areas of your life that may need to change. It's going to be some tough workup in here, girl, but we're going to walk this thing out together, uncovering some bold courageous actions that we can take to experience, not just a good life, but your whole life. Are you ready to live your whole life? Holy made. Let's do it.

If you enjoyed this episode of the Wholly Made Life Podcast, then make sure to subscribe to the podcast, and don't forget to give Angie a review. You can also take a screenshot of the episode and tag Angie in your Insta and Facebook stories.

 

*some of the links provided may result in a small affiliate fee that allows me to continue to keep putting out this free content on this podcast*