Wholly Made Life™- ReClaim your Whole Life, Tap into God-Sized Fulfillment for the Success Driven Woman, Mama, Wife, Sister

EP 31 What is Your Super Power? You are Wonder Woman! Fully Equipped with Who God Has Called You to Be! Walking in Your Purpose for your Family Super Mom!

EP 31 What is Your Super Power? You are Wonder Woman! Fully Equipped with Who God Has Called You to Be! Walking in Your Purpose for your Family Super Mom

Listen, SIS, you are stronger than you. Believe you have greater powers than, you know, because no matter how small, an act of kindness or generosity or simple positivity you put out into the world, it will make a difference. Do you guys know what that's from? We're going to find out in this episode!

Welcome back friends to this episode of Wholly Made Life. So I want to start today and talk about your super powers and yes, you have super powers and they are given to you by God

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 So when I'm talking throughout this episode, I want you to know that. Obviously I want to acknowledge that your superpowers are given to you directly by God. So I wanted to talk today about wonder woman, have you guys seen this movie? I tell you what, it's one of the best movies I cry and cry and cry every time I watch it. It's just amazing. But let's talk a little bit about who wonder woman is. So according to vocabulary.com wonder woman is a noun. It's a woman who can be successful at being a wife and also have a professional career at the same time. Hmm. How many of us does that sound like?

I just defined every single person listening to this podcast. Sister, you are a wonder woman. You are the wonder woman. So I want you to think the episode where, not the episode, the part of the movie, if you guys have seen it think about the part of the movie where they are in this bunker. And these guys have been stuck in this bunker for so long. They've not been able to progress forward to take over the area that they have been trying to take over. So she decides that because the choice was to go on and continue on their journey, her and her group, and let these men die in this bunker because they'd been there forever and they couldn't progress forward and they were going to die. They couldn't retreat and they couldn't go forward. They were just going to die. She decides instead to sacrifice herself and put others first.

So she jumps out of the bunker. She starts taking these bullets so that others can go ahead and take over the enemies bunker as you watch her in her strength, put her shield in front of her and step out alone and take bullets after bullets, after bullets, also that all of the others can run forward. And go ahead while she is the one under aim, she is the one under fire. I cried and cried during this part. And this is because of her strength, her compassion for these people, her empathy and her need to serve and save that's her power because she is a woman and women have these empathetic, strong feelings. This need to care for others. It's just an innate, nurturing quality that we have. That's us. That's women. We are wonder women. We are her. We embody everything that wonder woman is because that's who God has called us to be.

That's how we've been created. We sacrifice so others can go. We sacrifice so others can do. We sacrifice so others can eat and sleep. We go without so that others can have, we don't sleep because there's too much work to do sometimes. So when you think of wonder woman or the strongest woman of God in your life, who do you think of and what qualities do they have? Do you think of you and the qualities that you have when you think of a wonder woman? Why not SIS? You are that wonder woman. You are her don't you understand that there's somebody in your life thinking of you as their wonder woman. When someone asks them, who's a strong woman in their life, the wonder woman of their life, the wonder woman of God, you are the one that comes to that. Person's mind. There's somebody in your life that calls you, you their wonder woman.

Why is that so hard to believe? Friend? Why is that so hard to believe you are her. You are the strong woman of God. You are the wonder woman. I'm going to tell you why it's because the enemy constantly asks us. Who do you do? You think you are well, who do you think you are thinking? You're wonder woman thinking you're strong. Yes. The enemy can cause that doubt and disbelief in who you are, then it keeps you from working on an, in your purpose. If he, the enemy can keep you from doubting who it is that God has called you to be and the strength and all of the equipping that God's putting it within you so that you can walk out into that battlefield. You can walk out into your purpose and with your shield of God and take that fire from the enemy and keep on moving forward.

If he puts doubt in your mind, then he keeps you from walking in your purpose. He keeps you from walking out into that battlefield with your shield and doing the dang thing. He keeps you from protecting yourself with your shield when you need it. Because if you can get beat down enough, if you can get in disbelief and doubt enough, then you'll stop taking action. You'll stop taking those steps. You'll stop acting. You'll stop working. You'll forget who you are or you'll doubt what your calling was in the first place. That's what the enemy wants to do. He wants to strip you of your identity and your identity is that you are strong in Christ. You are the woman of God that he's created to be. So I'm here today to remind you that you are are wonder woman. You're the wonder woman of God.

You are here at her. You're victorious. You're royalty. You're strong. You're courageous. You're bold. You're blessed. You're called. You're chosen. You're restored. You're renewed and redeemed. You are strong in Christ. You're strong. He's equipped you with everything you need and everything. You are to be the wonder woman for those around you. You are her. And I don't want you for a second to forget that you are wonder woman. I may give you a couple quotes from wonder woman. If a loss makes you doubt your belief in justice, then you never truly believed in justice at all. And she also says, I will fight for those who cannot fight for themselves. You have been equipped to fight for others. Now I know that only love can truly save the world. So I stay, I fight and I give for the world. I know can be, that's a wonder woman.

And that's who you are. You are stronger than belief than you believe you are stronger than you. Believe you have greater powers than you know, you know why? Because all the powers and the strength that God has given you is already within you. It's already there. It's always been there. It always will be there. And you just have to recognize it and walk in it. Walk in your equipping. You've been equipped. Walk in your strength, walk in your power. That is made that power by Jesus by God take no, we're not that without him. But he's given all of this to us. Wonder woman was trained to be an unconquerable warrior. She fights. And as she fights, she discovers her true destiny and purpose. So I challenge you today, sister, to walk as an unconquerable warrior because he said, we are an overcomer. He said, we are the head and not the tail we are above and not beneath.

He said, we are overcomers and we are conquerors in Christ. Jesus, you have been trained. You have been equipped. You are an unconquerable warrior and you will fight. And as you fight, you'll discover your true destiny and your purpose lean into it. Okay? All right, sister. That was what I wanted to encourage you with today because you are strong and mighty in God. He is equipped you. You are somebody wonder woman don't ever forget it. Okay. Says, I'll see you on the next episode. Hey, wonder woman, before you go. I just wanted to remind you that if you feel stuck or if you can't quite identify what your superpowers are, grab a coaching session with me. I have 30 minute power sessions and an hour deep dive. Go ahead and hit me up on AngieToniniRogers@gmail.com to get my coaching menu. And we can talk further about what it is you need. All right.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us, your five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

EP 30 How to Bless & Release Your Adult Child. Moving from Rule Regulating Parenting to Relationship-Based Parenting. When it's Time to Let Go & Let God! For Biblical Scriptural Mamas

EP 30 How to Bless & Release Your Adult Child. Moving from Rule Regulating Parenting to Relationship-Based Parenting. When it's Time to Let Go & Let God! For Biblical Scriptural Mamas

Ladies! We are going to let go and let God sometimes that is one of the hardest things to do. I want to acknowledge it right now that this is hard, hard work, but sister, you can do it. Let's go friends. We're going to let go and let God!

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Hey guys, today, we are going to let go and let God sometimes that is one of the hardest things to do. I want to acknowledge it right now that this is hard, hard work, but sister, you can do it. Let's go friends. We're going to let go and let God okay.

 Welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life today. I want to expand a little bit on what I talked about on the last episode, which was going seven levels deep on your why. And I brought up this conversation about our children and letting our children go. And I'm currently in this season where my oldest is now 18, he'll be 19 in July. And he went off to college all the way to Arizona, 26 hours away. And that was one of the hardest things ever is letting him go that far and learning how to continue to parent from a place where he's a teen and he's into adulthood changing over that style of kind of a rule based parenting to a relationship based parenting because what's so important throughout. And we've talked about this in lots of other episodes for different things, but relationship and honesty and integrity in that relationship is number one.

And so I've always tried to create this relationship with my kids, where they feel comfortable enough to share with me and talk to me about the truth about what's going on in their lives, what they're doing, how they're feeling, even if the actions that they're taking are not desired, ones are not ones that I would necessarily approve of, but creating that relationship where it's safe enough for them to come to me and talk to me about what's going on. It's that fine line of condoning versus loving conditionally despite their behaviors or despite what they're doing. You know, interestingly, as they transition into teens and especially adulthood, it's really important to kind of, as a parent, try to transition out of that rule based regulation based parenting, where they need those rules and confinement such as you know, when they're little and they're going to touch a hot stove, well, you're going to jump in and you're going to take over and you're going to do the things you need to do to keep them safe.

There becomes a point though, when they get into this teen and adulthood where they're starting to create their own independence. And at some point we're going to have to let go and let God, right? Because despite our want to create this safe place for our kids, they still have to grow and learn and do on their own, whether they're making mistakes or not. And of course they're going to make mistakes. We all did. And I mean, when I think about myself in college and other, and even, you know, yesterday there are mistakes that I make on a daily basis, but if I didn't make those mistakes, I wouldn't have learned to do things differently to get a different result. So as a parent, we have to allow that ability for our child to make those decisions. And I think for me, when I was talking about that seven levels of why, of why I get so worried, anxious, upset, why it bothers me if one of my kids makes decisions that I don't approve of or that kind of thing.

It also comes back down to that same thing that I've talked about before related to how people perceive me as a parent, as a person in society, as a leader who, whatever that is, if my kid's not acting right, then it reflects something upon me was how I used to take that on. And what's important to realize is that just because your kiddo is doing something that they should or shouldn't do it doesn't reflect on me as a person or as a parent necessarily. Now it's really hard to not take that on. And I can give an example. If I see something posted by one of my kids on social media site that I don't approve of, I am going to pick up that phone and let it, especially for my oldest, I'm going to pick up my phone and be like, dude, what are you thinking?

Think about how you're representing yourself, how you're representing your family, your school, your job, because that's important and that's parenting. But at the same time, I have to choose to allow my child to at the end of that, make his own decision. And I shouldn't say child, I should say young adult. Okay. And obviously I'm going to be a little bit more careful about how I approach that because I don't want to create guilt and shame for behaviors that are not appropriate, but redeemable. Okay. So I am saying to you kind of how I'm thinking, like, dude, what are you doing? But as I approach that with him, I'm going to have that conversation a little differently, obviously to try to remove some of the judgment and maybe the critical nature of that conversation to ensure that he knows, listen, I love you. And I want the best for you.

And I want you to portray yourself in the best light. I want you to be you, but I also want you to be true to who it is you're called to be that kind of thing. And it's just a really hard transition because when they're 14 or 12 or 11, if they post something or get involved in something, I have that ability where I'm still in that rule-based parenting stage where I can just give consequences and take away the social media, take away the phone, you delete his account, that kind of thing. But once you get into young adulthood, especially when they're paying for their own phone, their own bills, there's a limited amount of regulating that I can do at that point. And while I wish and hope and pray that my child or my young adult will present himself in a way to society that is respectful and loving and displaying who it is that I know God's calling him to be.

That's not always going to be the case. And I can't always assign whatever that perception is to the job I did as a parent. Now, have I made mistakes? Yes. A hundred percent. And I continue to make daily mistakes because none of us are the best parent we can possibly be all the time because we are fallible. We make mistakes, but that's what God's there for. He's there to stand in the gap from when we make our mistakes. You know, as long as you know that you've done the best you could do with the resources you have, and you are attempting to use biblical principles to raise your children such as like in Proverbs 26, it says, train up a child in the way he should go. Even when he's old, he will not depart from it. That speaks to our foundation that we're building with our children so that when they do grow up to be adult children of ours, that they won't depart from it.

And that their spirit will be drawn back if they do sway or do fall away a little bit, but they've got that foundation and they've got that relationship with Holy spirit to come back to what matters. And the other is that Proverbs 13, 24, whoever spares, the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him. So when I talk about not owning the outcomes of our children, that's not a hundred percent, you know, because we do have a responsibility to parent biblically and take the responsibility to discipline our children in a way that's going to be able to create the most productive children we can. But to also know that it's our job to put that foundation in. But at some point they're going to have to make choices and that God will cover and God will stand and go after his children always no matter what.

And so even if we haven't and been raised by biblical parenting, gods stands in that gap because overall God is our father. And he always has been, always will be. So we have that responsibility, but at the same time, you know, they're still individuals and they still are going to make their own choices. Especially when you get into that late teen adult, a young adult to take on the full responsibility of every choice that your adult child is making is just not a fair thing to put on yourself. It's just not, it's not a fair thing to do to yourself, to beat yourself up because your adult child is making choices that you may or may not agree with. Does that make sense? But it's an inner work as a parent to not define our success or failure as a parent based on decisions that our young adult children are making.

And I just thought for whatever reason that came up and I thought, let me talk about this a little bit more, if not for you guys for myself, because I still, when these things happen, I still have to stop that circling thought that starts to happen in my head of, Oh my gosh, people are going to think like, what in the world are you doing? How did you raise him? I mean, are you raising, you know, barbarians over there? Or what, because number one, I don't know that people are actually thinking that because when it's not your own kid, it's not, there's not a responsibility or that ownership to feel a certain way about what that other kids that other moms kid is doing or saying. However, there is that, that it takes a village to raise. So like a lot of people in my church helped me raise my, my kids.

And I mean, two of my kids don't remember life before we were part of this church atmosphere that, you know, they've grown up there and everybody knows them and everybody's looking out for them. And, you know, I'll have people come to me and say, Hey, are, are, did you see that or this? And I appreciate that because I think it does take all of us to love each other enough to help each other raise our kids. But at the same time, they don't own how my child, my adult child presents himself in the community. I own that. So I'm going to see that differently than somebody else might. Okay. And my challenge to you would be, if you are in a place where, when people's children do things that you think, wow, they should not have done that, or whatever the case may be to just challenge yourself and think about, are you defining the quality of that?

Child's parents parenting because of the way that children are acting. And again, when they're small children, toddler, age, you know, all toddlers have these stages where they cry and scream and kick and throw tantrums. And certainly all of us have different parenting styles. And there are some styles that are more effective in squashing, certain kinds of behaviors than other styles. So I'm not necessarily talking about that. I'm just challenging you to really think about and reflect upon feelings and thoughts that you get about people's parenting styles before you make judgment, reflect on that and understand that every parent is most likely doing the very best that they can with the resources, experience, knowledge, support, health, status, money, status, et cetera, that they have at that given time. Everyone's most likely doing the very best that they can with the resources they have at that time.

And it could be an opportunity where maybe the Holy Spirit's nudging you to provide some sort of assistance, whatever that assistance might be, or maybe it's just prayer for that parent in that child. Okay. So again, it's just a small nudge and challenge because I had the same thing when I think these things about myself and there have been times in my life, especially in behavioral health, where I dealt with adolescents, and there were horrific stories about things that parents did or didn't do. But I also, the way that I could be most effective with that child as I was helping that child stabilize some behaviors or working with the parents, as we were trying to get the kids back into the homes, what was most effective was for me to remember that there are a lot of circumstances that I'm not privy to. There's a lot of history and experience or lack thereof that I'm not privy to.

Or if I am that I can start to see that they were doing the best they can with the resources they had. So it's just a small challenge as we're talking about making those judgements about parents based on children's behaviors. The other big thing is that somebody in my church in a leadership meeting said this last night it's about getting on your knees and praying because sometimes at the end of the day, you have to just pray because that's what we have control over. That's what we have the power over. We have to trust that God's going to do what he said, he's going to do. We, we know what he says about us, and I know what he says about my child, my adult child, and I have to just trust. And if there are things happening as I continue to walk out this, being an adult, being a mom of an adult child, when things happen, if they happen, I have to continue to remember that the best thing I can do is yes, continue to speak life over him and continue to pray that those are the most powerful things is reminding him of who he is, who he's been called to be, and then trusting God to move him and draw him near.

And this is about just in general, how we can empower ourselves to continue to parent in the best way that we know how once our kids hit adulthood. I'm not saying that my child was out there doing all kinds of crazy things or any air. He doesn't know, you know, kind of who he's been called to be, but all of us, as we transition into that college life, we it, at least this is my first time transitioning into this place where, okay, I can't just give him the rules and say, this is what you're going to do. And my 14 year olds coming up on that age to where I've got to kind of drop some of that rule, regulated parenting and build more into the relationship. So one of the best things I think, besides the prayer and speaking life over your children and continuing to do that, no matter what I mean, you know, until my kid until the day that I'm no longer walking this earth, I will pray and speak life over all the people in my life, because I believe that God hears those prayers.

And I know that God will do what God does, which is work everything out for our good, I think that the best thing we can do in addition to giving it to God and continuing to pray is to just love, love our kids, love the people in our lives because we can't control our kids' choices or lifestyles. It's just our job to love them. And we love them regardless. We love them unconditionally. We don't make our love conditional on whether or not our kids doing what he, I think that he should do. It's not a conditional love. It's a unconditional love. And letting our kid know that we are so grateful for who he or she is. We're so grateful for what God's put into their life and put into their spirit and just calling out all of those things that God has said about our kids and loving them unconditionally, because it's not just because we love them unconditionally doesn't mean that we have to approve of choices or lifestyle.

And this is with anybody in your life. I love all because that's what God tells me to do is to love all I love big and I love hard and I love all, but it doesn't always mean that loving someone means you have to accept behaviors or choices that they have. You can love people close to you or far from you without having to condone what it is they are doing or saying you don't have to always agree with everything, but just because you disagree with something doesn't mean you can't love. So it's not about judgment. It's about loving someone enough to be beyond what choices and lifestyle. And thank God that people have loved me beyond my choices sometimes and my lifestyle sometimes. Okay. You know, I am grateful for those that continue to love me, regardless of the choices that I made. I mean, I had let's see, I met my husband 24 years ago and we, we were married 11 years later in two kids.

So despite that choice that I made and the lifestyle that we lived for 11 years, where we cohabitated and we got pregnant, I was, we were together five years before I got pregnant with Clayton. And, you know, I beat myself up about those choices. Cause I wish that I could have done it differently. I wish I could have done it. The way that I know is right, which is to get married first and then have kids. But it's just not the way that it happened. It's not the, the lifestyle that I chose for that time. Now it's hard at this day and age to say, do, as I say, not as I do, because the reality is, is that as we lead our life, we leave an example for others. Now I hope that my kids make a different choice than I did all of us as parents.

Do. We all want our kids not to go through the same mistakes that we did or they make the same mistakes that we did. But the reality is, is that I also learned through that mistake, my relationship with God, my relationship with my husband now is tighter than it has ever been because I learned through those choices that I made. I learned how, how grace, how much grace and how much mercy and forgiveness I learned how to forgive and love harder and bigger than I would have otherwise. You know, the timing of Clayton's birth was such divine timing. So God blesses things, even though we may not be always doing the things that we're supposed to do, not blessing our choices in our lifestyle necessarily, but he loves us enough to be faithful to us and to have that grace and mercy. So I just felt like I wanted to expand a little bit on that topic because I still, you know, as a parent, I want what's best for my kids.

And I know that you do too, but sometimes as parents it's that balance of that rule, regulated parenting versus that relationship related parenting. And then also how to deal with disappointments or things that happen when our kids or our husband or people close to us are making choices that we just don't agree with, or that we, it breaks our heart because we know that choice is not going to result in the blessing that we want for them. So being able to balance those things with also understanding conditional love, regardless of those things, and also understanding that our God is a big God, and God will set us free. God will watch over us. God will send those angels before us to protect our paths. He's, he's saved us for so many things that we don't even know that we were saved from. He is working all things out for our good, so it's that faith and that trust, knowing that that's also happening, it's about handing over our trust to God and knowing that he will stand in the gap, he will continue to cover and protect.

And we know that he will continue to pull the people that we love closer to him, despite our own choices. And it's about not taking on the ownership of every choice that the people in our lives make. If it's different than what we would have chosen, their choices, other people in our lives, including our adult children or, or our small children, their choices don't define who we are or define how we did as a parent or how I am as a wife. Yes, it's connected, but it doesn't define who I am as a parent or who I am in God or who I am as a wife. You understand what I'm saying? It's it's important that they have a foundation, but an individual's choice is that individual's choice. The reality is, is that the only thing that defines is something for that person. There's not a direct 100% connection or definition that that gets attached to another person based on another person's actions.

So I don't know how clearly I'm saying that, but it's just important to remember that it doesn't define who you are as a parent. The only thing that defines who you are is what is in the Bible. It's got to align with that truth. So just remember that when you're struggling with that, if you struggle with that, like I do and have just remembering to align it up with the truth of what God says, who you are. So I just want to pray over you and your children today. God, I thank you for your consistency. I thank you for you having the last say in who we are. And I just thank you for the grace and the mercy. I thank you for being there to stand in the gap when we have to let go and let God I thank you for being the, the person we can lean on.

I thank you for giving us a safe place to hide under your strength under your will, under your wings of protection. I just thank you that you have given us a stable place to be in love in grace and mercy and forgiveness. I thank you God for saving us. I thank you God for protecting us. God, give us the strength, the wisdom, and the discernment on when and how to intervene in our young adult children's lives and our young child's life and our husband's lives and our coworkers life. God give us the strength, the wisdom and discernment. That's what I pray for right now, for all the parents, listening, all the coworkers, listening, all the sisters and the wives, listening. God give us that wisdom and discernment to know when and how to intervene in a way that is going to be in alignment of love.

Unconditional love for our sister or brother, son, or daughter in Christ. I thank you God for that discernment. And I just thank you for loving us. The overwhelming love that you have for us, let us have even a small, tiny portion of that for others in our lives. Give us the ability to love so big and so hard that regardless of the choices that the people in our lives are making, that they know that we love them. That's what we're called to do. Loving others. Like you have loved us in Jesus. Holy, all, mighty name. Amen. All right, sisters, thank you so much for listening. And if you've liked this episode, please don't forget to share it. Leave a review that helps us get the word out and get the podcast shared to show up for when others are searching. It just is such a huge help.

And I'm so grateful and thankful for you guys who are listening. And again, if you are ever stuck in a place where you just don't know how to proceed through something going on, don't forget that I am offering one-on-one individual sessions. There's a half hour power session and a one hour deep dive where we can get together and we can get through wherever it is that you feel stuck. Okay. just email me at Angietoninirogers@gmail.com and you'll be able to get information on the coaching menu that I have. Thank you guys. Love you guys. Have an awesome weekend.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review and you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us, your five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

EP 29 How to Go 7 Levels Deep to Find out and Define Your Why- Why It's So Important to Dig Deep to Understand Your Why-Your Reason for What You Do, Dream, Say, and for How You See Love For Moms

EP 29 How to Go 7 Levels Deep on your Why- Why It's So Important to Find Start Define your Why-Your Reason for What You Do and Love For Moms

Today, we're going deep... 7 levels deep. Let's talk about the seven whys, have you guys heard of this? It's, it's called lots of different things. Seven whys, 7 levels deep the 7 Why exercise... This is something that a lot of people use in coaching and in supervision leadership, as well as you know, a lot of sales teams use it to help motivate their, their workers.

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Welcome back ladies to this episode of Wholly Made Life. And I am actually in my car recording because I could not catch a break at home this week to get these episodes recorded. I mean, it's a never ending coming to and from and boys wrestling and dogs barking and a new corn team to have to start over. I mean, for the love of all mighty God, Jesus pray for me. So yeah my youngest had to go onto quarantine again because someone on the soccer team had been exposed or had gotten it and whatever the, whatever the specifics were and all of the kids had to quarantine again. So he's home again with me this week and I love him to life. But he is just a talker, not but, but, and he is just a talker and so it's not a possibility for me to record. So anyway, I had to run over to the school and pick up his, they call it the Wednesday folder. So I was like, well, you know what, I'm just going to hit record in the car and I'm going to talk about my episode. So then I was going to do for you guys and I don't have my notes or anything like that. So you guys just love on me and support me and just hang with me

And we will get this thing done

Then. Okay. All right. So actually today I wanted to talk about the seven whys, have you guys heard of this? It's, it's called lots of different things. Seven whys, 7 levels deep the 7 Why exercise? And yes, I'm saying the number seven and then why, W H Y and I think this is important. This is something that a lot of people use in coaching and in supervision leadership, as well as you know, a lot of sales teams use it to help motivate their, their workers. A lot of people use it within culture to create this missional culture where each person is connecting with their WHY by the way, a really good book. If you are wanting to connect with your why, or wanting to look deeper is Start with Why by Simon Sinek. , my gosh, Simon Sinek, S I N E K.

I'll put a link to the show notes to what his, where his book is. I don't get anything for sharing that you guys, I just when I find good stuff, I like to share it. So, and by the way, regarding that there are some things that I talk about and share on the show and I might have an affiliate link. And what basics, basically, what that means is that I get a small commission for sharing it. It's a way that if you click that link and you happen to buy a course, or you happen to buy a product that I am an affiliate of that it's just a good it's a nice way to be supported. And it helps me fund the efforts for the bucket. So there are some things that I am an affiliate of. One of which is I, I don't, I had lots, I don't know.

I don't like 12 people or something recently asked me, how did I start the podcast and all that stuff? Well, I took a course by Stephanie Gass. And so I am an affiliate of her course, because she gives you everything. You need to start a podcast. So when you go to ppu.atrogers.com, you can get her course. And so when you do that, I would get a small commission for that, just for sharing it. So that's how that works. So anyway, I just wanted to be upfront and open about that, but also I'm just, I don't, I am certainly for the, most of the stuff I talk about and I share on this podcast, I'm not an affiliate of, I just love this stuff. Like here's something else that I was going to mention later on, but I'll mention it now.

I go to a church called The Kingdom Center Church in Louisville, Kentucky, and my has written hundreds of songs. And she and her worship team called violent worship just released their EP of five songs. I'm in love with all of those songs, because number one, they're amazing life-changing songs. If you really pay attention and let the words move in you and let the Holy spirit move over you during that worship and praise, then you will be forever changed. And each of those songs have a different time and season in my life, but also I know and love and hang out with, and Just Life with all of the people that are on that album. So I, they're my friends and they're my family. And so when they do something great, I want to share it because I love them and I love what they do. And I also know that what they do impacts the world. So, you know, I just have that philosophy in life when somebody that is in my close circle or in my life is doing something great that I know is impacting people positively. I want to share them. I want to, I want to share that I want to share them. I want others to him be impacted in such a way that I have been and my wife. And so I just believe in sharing that and, you know, I don't get anything for sharing, you know, that related to violent worship, other than just knowing that you will be blessed and I'm blessed when you're blessed.

So anyway, if you have not gone out, you can go on iTunes and Spotify, wherever it's a violent worship, and it's a five song EP, and it'll change your life. If you let it all, I'm a big worship and praise person and music moves me like nothing else. So I'm always changed when a certain song hits me a certain way.

Get the Violent worship Album- Round 1 right here

So okay. So let's go back to the seven whys. And so what this is, it's seven questions deep. So basically when you think about something and you're, you're trying to look deeper, maybe you're trying to grow a little bit, you're trying to find out why it is that you do what you do, or why do you like what you like, or why does your heart's desire point in a certain direction, sometimes focusing and reflecting on

Asking why

Seven levels deep will help you get to what's under it. And I'll use a quick example and it might be a little messy again, cause I don't have any notes or anything with me, but so I thought about the doctorate degree that I'm getting the nursing I'm getting a doctorate of nursing and I only have the project left to complete and then I'll be done and graduated. Thank God. But I also still had the project under me and that's the biggest part other than the classes, that's the biggest part of the program. So I still have a little bit of weight, plenty of hours to get, but anyway, somebody asked me, well, why, why did you want

To do that? And so

The first level of my, why is just, you know, it could be something as shallow as

I don't know, or because I thought I had, I should. Or it, it seemed like the next step,

It's not really emotionally attached. It's it could be just kind of, it's just surface level. It's superficial. Okay. It's kind of a neat,

The jerk answer as to why you,

I might have done that. It might be a canned response or, or a politically correct response. Okay. So

Then if my answer is I don't know, then you might ask why, why don't, you know, and then I might say something like, well, I just

Felt like it was probably the next step and then someone would ask me, well, why would that be okay,

Next step? And then I might

Say in response, something like,

Well you know, for me,

See, I've talked about this before, especially in my episodes about recovering from perfectionism. For me it's about,

It was kind of, it's another title to add to my name. You know,

It seems like then it's a terminal degree. It's the last highest degree that I can get as a nurse. So it's about accomplishment. It's about

You know, about

That's the highest title quote unquote that I could get. So yeah.

Then the next question would be, well, why is that important to you?

Why, why do you need the highest title in your field? And then you start so about number three, about the third or fourth, why for sure you start to have to reflect a little bit deeper.

And the idea

DIA is that you continue to ask why until there's really nothing left to dig to you, get to the bottom, you get all the way to the bottom. If you stop at three, then you're still kind of in that BS phase a little bit, or that

The world answers

The canned answers, the politically correct answers are still kind of there. You're not really getting deeper into

What derives that. Why,

So right when we got to that question about, well,

You know, why, why do you need the highest title in your field snap?

That's right there where it starts to trigger me. And it triggers me pretty earlier me because I've done a lot of work. And I know

So what drives and has driven

And a lot of my decisions in my professional life, my educational academic life and my parent life being a wife, I know

That the worldly death

Of who I am and what that looks like, the worldly definition of what accomplishment is. I know that I have strive for that same reason why I don't. I cringe when I think about somebody showing up to my house unannounced because I haven't had time to make sure that all the rooms are tidy and everything is swept and the counters clean and the dishes are put away. You know, now I try to keep those little things, but we all live life. Right. And so I would not say that I just wasn't. I wish I was a lot, like some of my friends are and my sister. But I just don't feel like I'm a, the best

Home maker. Naturally

It's something I have to work at. So I feel a little, I feel less confident in that area. Like my decoration style, my housekeeping style. It's just not something that was a real focus. I was more action taker and a Dewar. I'm making sure people get fed. I'm making sure people get their stuff done. I'm making sure people get up. I'm making sure that we get home in time for this, that or the other, you know, I was a doer. I wasn't really a

It's not, I don't want to say I wasn't organized cause I am, I am, I do keep things organized. However, I always have a lot of things in the air. So I, I am much more organized when I'm able to outsource or delegate some certain things. And like, for me, me personally, when I think of housekeeping, I would love to delegate that housekeeping. Like I love to hire someone to come in and keep my house clean, just because I know that someone else has a better skill set. I keeping that organized and doing the actions that deal with that versus, Hey, quite frankly, the actions that are seen more outwardly, like I can hide a mess in my home, but I can't hide,

Hide myself in

The public eye or in

My field, my nursing field, for example, you know, when I have those letters behind my name you know, doctorate in nursing, that's a public recognition of some sort of accomplishment. So back to the seven why's, that is an example of how that starts to hit just a little bit deeper. And it helps, you know, I know I gone all the way down to the bottom, so this I'm not in a discovery process of why and

How I choose

To place value on different actions and different things. Like I placed a lot of value on titles, on recognition, on accomplishments. I go all the way to the bottom and I know where that comes from and why I do it.

And and on the surface level, just because I don't know that I'm ready to

Share it all out in the public because you know, family and things are still there and feelings can be hurt. And that is never my intention because my mom and dad did the best they could with the resources they had. And I'm grateful and I'm blessed and there's grace for all of that. I am not the perfect parent either. And so I think God, every day, there's grace for all the mistakes that I've made as a parent. But, you know, I

Was trying to meet

What I defined in my own head, the story I told myself of what my dad wanted from me and yes, my mom, but my, I always felt like my mom was proud of me regardless, but I always strive to make sure that my dad was proud of me. And one of the ways that I felt like defined accomplishment and success was letter grades in school. That was very, I, I felt like, and I am focusing on me. I felt like because you know, you know, that we all make up our own stories about certain things. We all make up our own narratives about what we believe others want from us. And this is what I was doing related to my dad specifically. But, and then that bled over to everything else. My teachers my bosses at work, like I placed expectations on myself that I had made up in my head that I thought that my dad and the teachers and, and bosses wanted for me.

And the only way that I was successful or worth anything in their eyes would be through these accomplishments. I hope that's making sense. So I know that now, because I've done this work. Okay. But some of it, and I've done this work specifically on this topic. Now there's other topics that I could go deep on and you know, that I haven't dug in the bar all the way to the bottom yet. So that's why the seven whys is so important. It's such an important exercise because it starts to hit you. And then, you know, as you grow and learn,

You discover more about yourself. You know, so

Even though I've discovered this about myself, and I know that my, you know, I'm 44 years old for much of my life, my actions were to get those accomplishments and be seen in the light of she's driven, she's successful. She meets the, you know, expectations. She's got all of these degrees, you know, all of these things because I thought that's what other people want

Wanted from me now. You know,

That doesn't mean that I don't still struggle with the fact that I don't want somebody to come into house and announce because I don't want them to walk in and think that I keep a dirty home. And again, my house is not dirty, but like we have three dogs. And so I have to sweep several times a day so that there's no dog hair on the floor. And sometimes I only do it twice a day or once a day, or maybe I go a whole day where I don't. And so there's dog hair on the floor, for example. Okay. it doesn't make me a bad person or a bad homemaker, but in my eyes, I want it to look like something that you've seen, you know, something that I've seen in one particular person's home. I can show up to the, I guarantee you, I can show up to that person's home.

And you know, all the stuff would be in order because that is her gift. She is a homemaker and she keeps her home, but that's her gift. It's just not mine. So, and, and the other thing too, is that I'm also, even in that, telling myself a story about what her, you know, she is and who she is and what her home is. So I just said, I could guarantee you, I could show up. I also, in reality, if I tell myself what the real story probably is, is that I could show up in her home and there would be something out of order because she's also not perfect. You know? So anyway, it's always about what we tell ourselves. Okay. So just be mindful. What is the story you're telling yourself about whatever this is? Okay. So back to the seven why's I told you guys, it might be a little bit over the, all over the place.

Cause I'm in my car. And I don't have my notes to keep me on drag. So, but so once you get to that three or four and you start to get that little twinge of, Ugh, this doesn't feel good, or I don't really you know, I don't know, or you're sick or you start to get frustrated. Like, I don't know, because just because, well, you don't get to answer because, because, because it's not an answer, it doesn't get you any further. Okay. It doesn't it doesn't force any growth when you just say because, and leave it. Okay. So you don't get to say, because I want you to pick a topic, pick something, maybe it's, why do you do what you do for work? Why do you let's see something that I get like in, in parenting, if I am nervous about my kid going to college, why, and then all the way down and you know, really it for me when I did this for about that, it came down to God asking me, well, Angie, do you trust me with your child or not?

I mean, he's mine anyways. I gave him to you to steward him and steward his growth, but he's mine. So do you trust me or not to take care of my child with God? You know? So when I got all the way to the bottom, that's what came up for me. It related to my anxiety, fear, worry about letting my child go all the way to Arizona. Okay. also what came up with that seven white exercise with that was, have I done enough as a parent? You know, I've failed in so many things. Have I done enough? Is he prepared enough? Does he have a good enough foundation

Of who he is as God

I called him to be of what his purpose spiritually is in this world to be able to use strength and make choices that are going to keep him safe, keep him progressing forward. You know, no parent wants their child to make mistakes in a way that impact their lives forever. Like, you know I mean you could think of anything dry getting in a car, drunk that one time and something happening, you know? I pray for grace and covering and protection for that. And I'm not saying my son said that. I'm just saying, that's an example of what we think about when you think about your kids going off to college and they're going to live that college life, but do they have that foundation? So it came up to my own thoughts about my own failures and being the mom, you know, or not being the mom that I should have been or not doing enough.

But again, when you go through the why's of that thought, I still ended up with energy. You trust me or not. Do you trust that I will stand in the gap for when you've made errors? Do you trust that I'm a forgiving father and I've forgiven you for the errors or mistakes you've made, do you trust that I will keep him safe and covered? And do you trust that he understands how to wear the armor armor of God, to be an overcomer in as the world pounds against them? Do you trust me or not? And so that's what it came down to. So you can see that this can get pretty deep. And so you want to take time, journal it out, just, just go through all of these steps about why, and when you start to feel frustrated or stuck then you know, just go another level deeper.

And if you're truly stuck and you truly need a little bit more help with this, then just reach out to me. I mean, I do sessions with people coaching sessions that we could do a short 30 minute power session and go through one of these topics that you feel like you're struggling with, or you're trying to find some clarity on or we can do a more intensive session. That's more, it's an hour long. So anyway, I help people that get stuck with this, but these are things that you can also do on your own, you know, journal through these steps, you know, another big one that comes up and the guys, I also want to let you know, I am hoping to have a guest on here soon about finances, because a lot of you guys are taking the short term assessment or the not short term. The Holy life made short assessment. Finances are a huge deficit area, a huge area where we, we are identifying that. We need some changes in me too. So I'm hoping to have someone on that will help with that. So be looking forward to,

And, but that's a good one,

Another great Y to Y exercise to go through about financial freedom. I want financial freedom.

Okay. Y and then, you know,

And the next answer might be so I can pay my bills. Okay. But why do you need to pay your bills? And then you're going to go deeper and deeper and deeper. And then you're going to end up realizing that it's about, because I want to spend quality time with my family. And I don't want to have to, you know, I don't want my children's children to have to worry about their finances or worry about not having a place to live, you know, so,

Okay.

So this is something that you can do around whatever you want, financial freedom. You're the way that you love yourself or care for yourself joy or happiness. So you start with a very general question. Well, why, you know, I want, I just want to be happy. Well, why? And take it all the way seven levels deep and seven is just a quote quoted number. It's just a guy. If you need to go to 10 debt level seat, then go to 10. If you need to go to 15, go to 15. If you get to the very bottom in five or six, then that's good. Now I would challenge you if you're doing less than seven to really see for real, is there any deeper that you can possibly go? Okay. So I would love to

Hear more from you guys about whether or not what you've learned in doing this, because what I want you to do, I would love for you to do is just go through and journal, just pick something and journal seven levels deep on the, why do the, why exercise and then hop over to the Facebook community group and share it. I can put a post in there when I post about this episode to put under there, what did you do? Your seven, why exercise on and what did you learn? And again, these are just exercises that we can do to grow, because remember we're all growing or should be growing. We cannot get to our destination without feedback, without growth. We can't, you know, a C can't bus through the ground, unless it grows a train, can't get to the state, to its destination and less, the track is giving it to feedback on the way. Okay. We all have to grow. If you stop growing, you die. I mean, there's no, there's no, that's a black and white. You're either growing or you're

Your dad. And that can be in physical or the spiritual.

Okay. The you've got to keep growing. You've got to want to continue to grow and learn and challenge yourself. So I highly, highly recommend that you try this exercise about something that is either frustrating or bothersome or just something you've wanted. You want to explore a little deeper. Okay. All right, guys. Well, I will see you guys on the next episode. Thank you for being patient with me as I rambled through not having my outline together so that I keep me on track and also being in the car. So you guys make it an amazing day.

EP 28 Fixing the Foundation of Your Marriage with Prayer- How to Fight your Spiritual Battles with your Husband. For the Wife who wants more fulfilling marriage! Holding hands CAN save relationship?

EP 28 Fixing the Foundation of Your Marriage with Prayer- How to Fight your Spiritual Battles with your Husband

We're just going to talk about how to pray with your husband. This is something that can be a little bit awkward, a little bit out of the ordinary, I guess if you're not used to doing it. So let's just talk about a few little tips that we can do, and it will do wonders to strengthen your marriage.

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Hey ladies, welcome back to Wholly Made Life. And listen, if you've been feeling stuck or overwhelmed, or like you can't really fix the foundation of your Holy made life, then jump over to my email@angietoninirogers@gmail.com and ask for a session of coaching with me. I have one-to-one coaching sessions available, and we can walk through how to fix that foundation for your Wholly Made Life™. Let's get into today's episode today. We're just going to talk about how to pray with your husband. This is something that can be a little bit awkward, a little bit out of the ordinary, I guess if you're not used to doing it. So let's just talk about a few little tips that we can do, and it will do wonders to strengthen your marriage. Let's go,

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Wholly Made Life™ Short Assessment: http://bit.ly/shortassessment

Ladies. Welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life™. And today I want to talk about something that can be somewhat awkward and uncomfortable, but that is praying with your husband. Now, some of you guys may have already made this a habit, and if you have kudos to you, because it is one thing that for sure will strengthen your marriage. It has to, as soon as God is in the middle of it, it is his idea to begin with marriage itself is his idea to begin with. So when you keep him in the middle of it, then your marriage just has to get stronger. But sometimes this can be harder than it seems. Sometimes it just feels awkward. And especially you've had some sort of argument or a conflict, or just feeling kind of mad in your relationship. Sometimes it just feels hard to break that barrier and pray for your husband and or with your husband, not necessarily for your husband, hopefully you're praying for your husband and your family every day.

And so I just wanted to talk about a few things that you could do to make it easier and more comfortable to pray with your husband. So obviously a great time to do that is right before you go to bed. Now, my husband and I typically go to bed at different times. I am a late, I stay up late and he goes to bed early because he has to get up at like four 30 in the morning or something craziness like that. My goodness, but I like to stay up late. So I'll give you an example of what we did tonight. What I've talked to him about is that, you know, we're praying separately, but it's really important that we come together in agreement because the Bible says for two or three are gathered, God is in the midst of it. And so it's really important that you come together with your spouse to pray in agreement for what you're both praying for and believing for, because it's just stronger.

It's just, you're in agreement with someone else. And you've got someone else doing that with you. Not to mention that it is obviously a great thing for your children to see the both of you guys praying. Okay. So back to my example for tonight. So he was getting ready to go up to bed. So I just said, Hey, why don't we do our prayer real quick since I'm going to stay up and I'm going to do a little bit more work. And so I just grabbed his hand and I went first and prayed out loud for some different things. And then he prayed out loud for some of the things that he was believing for. And then we affirm each other in those prayers. So it doesn't have to be this major thing. It doesn't have to be this beautiful Psalmist like Breyer that doesn't have to be beautiful and eloquent.

It can just be, you know, talking to God with your husband in the room and just hold hands, make that connection physically and spiritually together. Even if it's just a few minutes last night before we were going to bed, I actually was in the bed at the time before he was asleep. And so I just put my hand on his shoulder. I said, Hey, I'm going to pray for you. And I went ahead and prayed out loud. Now, other times you could just touch a shoulder and pray to yourself. If you want, you don't always have to pray out loud, but it's just one of those things. There's power in your tongue and there's powers in the words that you release into the atmosphere. And it's certainly more powerful when you have your husband on board covering that and listening to that. And if your husband is not as vocal, like mine is not as vocal.

He still will do it. If I grab his hand and say, come on, let's pray. Even if it's uncomfortable and you laugh a little bit and it takes a little bit of time, that's fine. Nobody says that that's not okay. Okay. It doesn't have to look like it does in the movies or what was that movie? Prayer warriors. Oh my gosh. I can't believe why I'm going blank on that. It's prayer warrior room, prayer room, something like that. You guys know what I'm talking about anyways. It doesn't have to be a beautiful prayer like that. Okay. It can just be prayer. Okay. So some other things you can do or some prayers that you might have memorized, just take time when you say those prayers though, and really think about what those words are. Something I do in my kids do actually on the way to school every morning, or we all take turns, praying out loud for different people, for different things.

We end it with the, our father and the glory be because those are words that we can say in unison together. And we say it slowly enough to where we're paying attention to what those words are, but each of them will take turns and they will talk about praying for their friend who hurt their arm. And they're praying for healing for their arm or praying for someone who, you know, there was a kid that said that he wasn't sure if he believed in God. And so one of my kids are praying hard for the Holy spirit to pull his heart back to him and show him his love for him. And so we all just pray in agreement and it's the same kind of thing that you can do with your husband. Okay. Something else that we can do to put it out in front of us is we can put a little, either a white board or a notepad or something.

I know Pat on the counter or a whiteboard on the frigerator and we can write down, I need prayer for, and then when people go by just my back, my head, my wrist, financial provision a new job, whatever those things are. And then that way, when we're walking by, you know, someone can tap that thing and just make a mental note of saying, yep, I'm an agreement praying for financial provision or praying for a new job or whatever those things are. Okay. That's another idea that you can do. The other thing that I would suggest is as you walk by your kids' bedrooms on the way to bed, or before you wake them up or whatever, just, you know, tapping the door and thanking God for the covering, the covering and the protection that he is. And, you know, rebuking the devil and saying that, you know, the enemy is not welcome in this house is not welcome in this room.

You know we pray against all the strongholds, all those kinds of things. So just as you're walking through your house, you can just be talking out loud God, to confirm what it is that you're praying for, what it is that you are believing for. Okay. That's another example. Okay. You guys, I've had to pause this recording so many times because there is this horrible itch in my throat and it's causing me to continue to cough. I don't think the enemy wants me to do this episode, even though this is just a quick little episode on prayer. Obviously this is very powerful for you and your family, because I am having like these coughing fits and I have no idea where these came from. So anyway, the other thing I was going to say about that is, you know, the enemy does not want us to pray because there's truth.

And that there's power in prayer and there's power when two or three are gathered together in agreement about that prayer. And so the more that you and your husband can pray together, the more intimate your spirituality grows. And after your spirituality grows together, your spiritual maturity in and as a couple grows, your physical intimacy grows. Your emotional intimacy grows because you're spending that time. And there's just something powerful about prayer with your spouse and prayer with your children. Okay? This episode is really more about praying with your spouse and just doing it, getting over the awkwardness and just doing it. If you're not able to pray with your spouse, then pray for your spouse all the time. By the way, when you are praying for your spouse, pray as if he is already the strong man of God that he is called to be okay.

Don't pray for things that you hope for. Pray as if he is already the strong man of God that you want. Okay? Pray as if your children are already the men or women of God that they're called to be okay. Pray as if that is the reality. Yeah, because again, there's power in life, in our power of life and death in our time. So my challenge for you today is to pray with your husband out loud. Before you go to bed tonight, just hold his hand and say, Hey, I want to start praying together before we go to bed. And if it's way awkward, then just push through it. Guys. You've done harder things than grabbing your husband's hand and saying a prayer out loud. It doesn't have to be long. It can be just as much as God. Thank you for raising up my husband to be a strong man of God.

I am thankful for this union. I thank you, God, that you've brought us together to be husband and wife. I thank you for our family. I thank you for our household. Thank you for your provision and all things. Thank you for healing in our mind, our body, our emotions, and our spirit in Jesus' Holy name, thank you for covering and protecting us. Amen. Okay. Just do it. I promise you the more you do it, the less awkward it will be. And even if it doesn't get awkward, how much stronger will your union or your relationship be? If you do this and what if this is the thing that is going to soften your husbands? Okay. Remember, we're all about what our actions can be, right? You're only responsible for your actions. So if praying with your husband will strengthen your marriage and it's something that you can do, even if he doesn't want to participate, that's fine.

Hold his hand and put your hand on his shoulder and just say, Hey, give me a couple minutes of quiet so I can pray for you. And even if he doesn't hear you because he's too uncomfortable or because you know, you can't pray out loud, at least he knows, Hey, we are in physical union right now and praying for me. And I, I guarantee you that will soften his heart. God will work through that. Okay? So let's do the hard things. Let's do the awkward things, because those are the powerful things. When we do awkward and hard things, and we take responsibility, those are the things that are going to impact our marriage and our life. And the more that we can impact our marriage and our union positively, the more our children are impacted. The more our friends and families are impacted. It's just all good. Okay. All right, guys. So I'm going to pray for you tonight.

God, I come today in praise and thanks for you covering and protecting my sisters that I ask that you give them strength and courage and you give them a boldness to pray out loud for their husbands, for their families, to fight back against what the enemy wants to do to destroy, kill, and steal. The enemy has no place in their homes. And we rebuke the devour of the devil. We, we enlighten the strength and wisdom and discernment of the, of the one and only almighty God. We thank you God for covering and protecting us. We thank you God, for the strong mighty men, you're raising up in the spirit to cover and protect their homes. We thank you God, for the strong women of God that are walking with the dominion and authority that you have given them to be the, that he needs and the mother that the children need and all the things, because you have strengthened her with your spirit. And we thank you in Jesus

Before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us. You're five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see you in the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

EP 27 Is Your Work an Idol? Special Guest: Stefanie Gass! Feeling Restless Even though You're Successful at your Professional Job? For Burnt Out Overwhelmed Working Moms- Find Clarity in Your Calling

EP 27 Is Your Work an Idol? Special Guest: Stefanie Gass! Feeling Restless Even though You're Successful at your Professional Job? For Burnt Out Overwhelmed Working Moms. Find Clarity in Your Calling

Hey ladies, welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life™. I am so excited to share this episode with you. I was able to interview a friend of mine. She's actually my coach and my mentor. She's the one that's helped me get everything started with this podcast and help me gain some clarity over what it is I am being called to do and how I can put those things into action for the biggest impact. So she is been, she's been instrumental in getting everything Holy made life up off the ground with me. She is a wife, she's a mom. She has the Stephanie Gass Show, which is ranked top 25 in the podcast world for Christian entrepreneurs. She actually helps women uncover and tap into their God-sized calling. She helps them create kingdom businesses. She helps them launch podcasts and monetize using courses and coaching.

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So she loves to do this. She loves podcasting. She loves working with women, and I tell you, she has been instrumental in helping me create some of that clarity. And if you want to get some clarity in your life, get clarity on your calling, whether it is in a business or just whatever it is God's calling you to do. I highly recommend that you reach out to her. I will put a link in my show notes so that you all are able to access her course, her information and clarify your calling. It's a course, it's online. It's something that I highly, highly recommend. She also has a free group. I'll put that in the show notes as well, so that you can link to her. She's a great friend. She really just truly wants women to create a true change for themselves. And she uses her gifts that God's given her to help women create that clarity so that you guys can create that clarity for your calling and you can serve and use your gifts for God's glory. So I'm really excited for this episode guys, tune in. You will not regret taking a few minutes and listening to her. So I am so excited guys. Let's get into this episode and meet Stephanie.

Hey mama, welcome to Holy may life where I believe that you are not created to do just one thing in your life. Well, you are not just your job, your title or your salary. You're not just a mom or a white versus sister. You are fearfully and wonderfully made to lead in all areas of your whole life. Your life is like a pie that's made up of different pieces that create a complete circle and girl, you deserve to enjoy the whole pie. Hi, I'm Angie Tinetti Rogers and mama. I know you are really good at what you do in your profession or business, but if you're ready to stop ignoring different pieces of your pie and reclaim your whole life, then you are in the right place. Girl, let's tap into the whole life. God has for you and experienced that God sized fulfilled life together. We're going to walk through some boundaries, leadership mindset and restoration in different areas of your life that may need to change. It's going to be some tough workup in here, girl, but we're going to block this thing out together, uncovering some bold courageous actions that we can take to experience, not just a good life, but your whole life. Are you ready to live your whole life? Holy made. Let's do it. [inaudible]

Okay, guys. Welcome back to this episode of Holy made life. And I am so excited. I have such a special treat today to introduce you to what my friend, my mentor and my coach she's been instrumental in helping me with this podcast. So I can't wait to introduce you to her name is Stephanie Gass. Welcome to the show.

Yay. Hello. Thanks for having me, Angie.

No problem. I am so privileged and honored. So today guys, I wanted staff to share her story. She's got an amazing story all the way from corporate to what she's doing now. So I just wanted to her to give you her journey and tell you a little bit about her journey and how she got to where she is today.

Yeah. So this is a doozy hope y'all are ready. And I think the main thing is I want you to hear from this story, as I share with you, is that I think we all start out seeking after things that we think the world, the, what, the world's definition of things, right? Validation or success or worthiness, and it still leaves us broken, right? It still leaves us searching and seeking and looking for what is this missing, this worthiness that I can't seem to find. And ultimately through our own searching process, trying to figure out the answers and be our own beacon of light. And we're left in this constant state of, I guess, pain and turmoil at the end of the day, right? Cause we're like, this is not ultimately what is feeling like I'm in this calling work or I'm feeling unhappy or I'm feeling lack, or I'm not feeling that worthiness.

And then we turn to God's way and we feel a very different outcome. We feel a very different way of life. So that's what I want you to pull from this story as I share. So like Andrew mentioned, I'm Stephanie gas. What I do now is I am a coach for the faith led entrepreneur who wants to figure out their calling and get clarity on that calling. So they can create a kingdom business and use their gifts for God's glory. And then ultimately have a business that lights them up using their giftings, using the, that God has for them. And I run a top 25 podcasts, the Stephanie gas show and a coach and have courses and all the things I work less than 30 hours a week. I've got two little boys. It's pretty Epic now cause I'm partnered with God in what I do.

So that's what I do today, but let's rewind back about a decade and look at how I got here and how I got to this space of doing business God's way instead of the world's way, started out in corporate America. I've always been a high achiever that comes all the way back from childhood, having a dad who has super high expectations and you know, his growing up in his generation, it was all about go to school, get the job, get stability. And that is what will equal your happiness later in life. Your, you know your stability and having that financial success. So, okay, cool. And when you achieve that's when you get attention. Got it. So grow up, do that always a high achiever got good grades, went to college, went got my master's degree, went into corporate and you know, it was just me.

So I easily became a workaholic easily slid into that. I've always been good at work. And when you're good at something, that's where you tend to operate because it feels good for you. Oh, I'm good at this thing. I'll live there, literally live there. I will live in this thing. I'm good at which here's, here's the kicker, right? That can be your gifting and tip. And often it is it's your God directed giftings. But at the same time, the enemy knows it too. Not to give him any credit, but he's like, Ooh, she loves work. How can I twist that to my benefit? Well, let's just make her a workaholic by the age of 23. Perfect. So there, I went climb that corporate ladder. I was the youngest financial controller in this global company. I was going to Germany and Spain and jet setting.

And I had the Blackberry phone 24 seven, right. Like, and it was fine. So it was just me, her. So I thought, but it was playing out in all these different areas of my life drinking way too much partying way too much because you had to learn to have that release from working 24 seven. So I would do that. I'd punish my body that way. And then I would go back to work. And so it was like this just cycle of really just unworthiness, I guess, even though I'm working so hard, even though I, Oh, I'm I, you know, I'm not skinny enough, I'm not fit enough and I need to work more. So like just searching, searching, searching, searching. And I was a Christian quote unquote, but I had definitely not found my true relationship with Christ. And so I was looking in all the wrong places.

Well that went on for four or five years. And then I met my now husband. He was our auditor at the company. So funny, he walks in and I'm like, I'm gonna marry that guy. I am to my friend in the cubicle next to me, it was so divine and anyway, true story. So we're now married, which is so fun. God's got jokes. But at the time when we started like secretly flirting and, and that going on and then the company shut down. So at this time I was late twenties. I was engaged to my now husband, Brad and the company was shutting down and I had a choice, go move to Germany, keep working for this company. Great. Try to find something else here where we live, but there's not so many manufacturing jobs like that and big plants, so, or figure something else out.

And I was like, well, I guess I'm at a crossroads. We want to have kids. We want to have a family. What if I try to be an entrepreneur? And right about the same time my mom got into a network marketing company, I knew nothing about network marketing at all. Except that some girls on the promo videos were making millions of dollars floating in their pools, sell some skincare stuff. And I was like, well, that sounds fine if they can do it. So can I totally just jumped in? And that's what I did. I left corporate everything I knew to just become an entrepreneur.

Wow. Okay. So you just packed so much in that so far. And quite frankly, some of that sounded so familiar to myself, finding that worthiness in the world and having a highly high expectations or highly critical dad who that's, how you achieved and that's how you showed people that you were achieving. So one of the things, when you talked about coming to a floor roads, what would you say the role God had at that point in your life when you were going from corporate into making a decision to move into the network marketing, what role did God have in that? What role did prayer have in that, that a point in your life?

None. Okay. None. I did not. At that point, have that relationship with God at all. Didn't pray over those choices did not turn to him for guidance. That was all me. Okay. Now the good news is he uses everything for good. And so it's fine. Now I see how like parts of that phase in my life were still preparing me. Cause he goes before me and I was saved at nine. So I've always been his daughter. I just fell away for a while. And so who knows what, what handiwork he had behind the scenes, but I didn't knowingly as I should have bring those choices to him first.

Okay. That's so good. I just wanted to point that out because I think some of us, when we are in that journey, we don't always intentionally know that we should be taking things to God, but that's how he's working on us the whole time. And he used all that. He uses all of it for good. It's all redemptive. So I just wanted to point that out because I know I kind of know where you are now. And I think that's important to this story as we learn and grow in our maturity in Christ and and being able to bring things to him. So, okay. So you were, you joined the network marketing company

Yes. And climb that ladder as well. Two years in, so had one son miles, my older son and still a workaholic at this phase and went all the way up to the top. 1% of the company, again at the expense of everything else in my life, right? This time I had gained 60 pounds. So I was going the other direction and, and just very unhealthy anxiety and working 24 seven, my son probably never saw me without an ear piece in my, my thing, my ear on my face, the whole first two years of his life. And it was awful the way that I would take calls at the expense of anything didn't matter. It would be, you know, six in the morning, it would be 10 at night, all of it. And it's just, it's, it's heartbreaking to look back and go with the things you thought were important in your life were really just an idol.

And me chasing that success was such a facade from the world that when you get it, when you make it, it'll be worth it. And I believed it. Like I truly believed when I make it, this will make sense. But looking at it now from this lens of 20, 21, 2020 is perfect vision going, wow. I missed out. I'm so much with him from a selfish place of, for me, you know, I want to grow this for me. I want to make more money more. And anyways, again, God is so good and he's redeemed that with me and, and it's all good. And I forgiven myself and he has forgiven me for that phase. But what happened was from the outside perspective, Oh, she's made it, she's doing so great. Right. Everybody can see, which is exactly what I thought I wanted. Well, at that point in time you know, everything else was starting to crumble away.

And here's where I believe that God started to step in. So we were, we were getting back into church pretty consistently. I hadn't had like that breakthrough moment yet, but it was coming. And the company went through a rebrand, my team, all the new shiny companies that came out back in 2016. And so my multi-sector your business was like gone within six months and there was just no more money. And I was pregnant with my second son at this time. And it was like full on identity crisis, Angie, because at this point in time, all I knew what was, I equal my work. I am only as good as my bank account as my work, as what people see me as. And so that's where I believe God was like, Hey, it's time for my daughter to come home. I need her to get back on this path.

I have big plans for her and this is not it. And so when that company crumbled beneath me, that's where we had to borrow money from my son's savings account to pay the bills. My husband sold his Harley Davidson to pay the bills and that, and I'm here really humongous, pregnant. Like everything is like, I don't have any money. The company is like all of it, right? It's like nothing's left and, and full identity crisis. And I'm like, okay, this is it. Like, this is my I'm in the ashes moment. There's nothing left here of what I thought I was. I have a choice. I can turn back to the world to rebuild myself or I can turn to God to rebuild me. And I knew where I got myself and it was right there in that pile of just ashes and brokenness and anxiety and unworthiness and ignoring my son and like putting everyone second to this business that crumbled and left me broken.

And that was the moment where I was like, I'm done, I'm done with my I'm done leading myself. I am not big enough to do this. I don't want to be my work anymore. I need to be who he created me to be. So I got out a sheet of paper and I started writing down who God wants me to be. And I wrote down, he wants me to spend time with him to surrender to him, to get back into my health, to put my family first again, to to still do. I knew business was in there somewhere, but I put it at the very bottom of the list. Cause honestly I was really over it at that point in time. And I was like, here you go. I live here. I'm surrendering my entire life to you right here on this piece of paper in this moment, take it.

I'm done. And a couple of weeks later, we were in church in worship. And I had like the true baptism in the Holy spirit moment. Like the tears, the chills, the Holy spirit, goosebumps, everything like couldn't breathe. I was like, he's got me. Like, he's here. Like Holy spirit is with me in this walkout. And I'm, I'm made new, I'm totally made new in him, but easier said than done. Okay. So I'm looking at the paper going, must be nice to be her, got her life together. She's fit healthy kids. Or she's got this business that she works part time, like whatever. Yeah. Right. So I just started with one thing a day and the first thing was I needed to get my health back. So I joined a gym. I couldn't afford that. Had daycare that I could do two hours. So I'd work out for an hour.

And then I would try to figure out what I was doing with my business. And I started with just like lives, helping moms. I'm like, let me just start with like helping these moms who have online businesses. I know how to grow big businesses online. I'll start there. They were messy. They were awkward. They were really busted. I did it anyway. Didn't know the outcome, but because I was doing it his way and this time praying over every choice, Angie. So back to your other question, it was like, Oh, do you want me to do this? Do you want me to take this, this opportunity? Do you want, do you want me to work on this, this thing this week? Like Holy spirit put things in order for me. And the order was me time with me time with your husband, your kids, your health, right?

And then all the way down at the end of the list was figuring out this business all the while he's bringing in favor, he's got somebody like, Hey Steph, can you do some social media consulting? I'll pay, we'll pay you two grand a month. I'm like, okay. Wow. Like, so he was making sure I was taken care of this whole time that like the business was gone and the income was gone. And so praise him for that. He always makes a bridge right? When he calls us to cross the ocean. He's like, but here's a bridge, but you got to take the step. So I was just taking the steps every day, didn't know, didn't know, take the step, take the step. So this was 2016. It was a hard year. I didn't just, it wasn't just easy and yes, I trust you, but it was like, I trust you. Wait, do I trust you way? Do I? But I kept going. I kept renewing my mind. I kept getting familiar with God. Focusing on the Bible is trying to strengthen who I was. Do you have any questions about this hard period, because then I'm going to move to climbing out of the Valley in a second.

Yeah. So I just wanted to point out a couple of things you said, first of all, we're going to have to go back to that 20, 20 vision at the end. So let me don't let me forget that at the end. But the, you said a lot of things. One is breaking it down to one thing at a time, one step at a time, just doing the thing and then also doing the thing scared or fearful or with anxiety or in doing the thing anyway, doing the thing, even though you didn't know how or what even sometimes to do, but doing it under prayer. So if you can just expand a little bit on how did you, you know, how did you break that down? What, what were some of those steps that you did to break it down and get through that? Just push through that fear, doing it messy.

Yeah. So one, once I had that sheet of paper and it was truly like a little loose leaf piece of paper, Angie and I was like, scribbling it out. But it was something that I've never forgotten about because that was this defining moment where you draw your line in the sand. So I think if any of you were in that, just break down moment, like nothing is working. This isn't making sense or it's not working. Or my life feels like the pressure is too much to bear or I'm not operating what God wants for me. Just start with the sheet of paper. Right? Put your hand on that sheet of paper. Holy spirit. Be here with me, father, God lead me, use my pen, use my mouth. He's my heart. Give me my gifts. Help me to speak to me through the sheet of paper right now.

Who do you want me to be? Who are you calling me to be? What needs to change? What do I need to let go of? And just let it flow because it's here inside of you, right? The answers are there. But when you get them out of here, your mind and your heart, and you put them on a piece of paper, that's when you get to see it and inventory it and put it in order. And then from that sheet of paper, if I did nothing with it, it would never have helped me to get to this point. So from the paper I made a plan from the paper, you make a plan. Okay. And then I like what Angie said. She said taking action through the pressure under prayer. So why out of the pressure, but because there's a lot of pressure to do something with the paper.

So you prayerfully take action and you move through that pressure. And that's also how you step out of faith and you crush the fear, lots of, a lot of alliteration for you guys in that one. But basically I went to the planner. I've always been a good planner, got up the planner. And I was like, what do I do this week? And I wrote in John and Jim find one, a daycare. It's like, yes. And I planned it in. And then I planned in when I was, and then I planned in waking up a little bit earlier and I just inched it. I started waking up 15 minutes early to pray. Then I was like, Ooh, this feels so amazing. I love this. Let's bump it to 30. Now I do an hour because that's so important for me to get right with God every day.

And to spend that time with him. And it's a non-negotiable for me now. But I started with something that seemed doable with my life. I didn't freak myself out and be like, you're going to the gym seven days a week. And you're doing an hour with God every morning. Cause that would have been too much. I wasn't ready. So I just three days a week, let's hop to the gym. We can start there. Then I went to the next thing on the list, husband, okay. You know, got some work to do there. I've been ignoring this man to run this business. Like I need to have some hard conversations. I need to repent for these things. Apologize to him. I need to make him a priority. I need to be sure that we're spending quality time that he feels seen and heard and work on that.

And so what does that look like in a planner? Everything you need to do has action steps behind it, but you have to make it intentional, prioritize it, plug it in just like Andy talks about with her wheels and with her buckets that she teaches you guys, same stuff. Okay. So I planned it in and I would go to that day in the planner and I was in such a raw broken state too. It really helped for me to be like, I'm not going to sit here and my thoughts and my misery, I'm gonna go to this thing and see what I said I was going to do today and just check it off. Right? Like let's just move my feet. Let's just move my feet. And each day got easier. Each week I got more powerful each month, God strengthened me each year. He clarified my steps more and more and more and more and to think, I mean, that was the end of 16. So 17, 18, 19 2020. That was five short years ago that I was in the biggest breakdown of my entire life. And now I'm sitting at the peak of a mountain top in my life where I've never been here and I'm like five years, man. Like he, God can work in your life when you allow him when you partner with him. So that's what I did Angie to do that work.

Yeah. That's so good. And I think too, the other thing that you mentioned, and you just, you know, on a big scheme in little schemes, is that throughout those steps throughout that process, he gave you confirmations. He, he, he showed up with a $2,000 contract for social media console conference consulting. And I think he does that for all of us, as long as we're looking for that. And we give that credit to him when that happens. So that's so good. That's such a part of the process is being intentional and looking for what he's doing for us.

Yeah. And seeing those confirmations come through at the time, I didn't really know as much as I see now, like now I'm super hyper aware of like, God wink. That was amazing. Thank you. You know, but at that time I'm like, Oh, well that's kind of random. Sounds good. But like, look for the miracles, seek for the miracles and then write them down. One of my favorite things is every month doing writing down the praise report and the miracles that have happened that month. And it's like, I mean, there are handfuls of things that he's done to just keep you on the right path and their confirmation, like Angie, like, Oh wow. That Jim, just out of nowhere, right next door to my mom's just enough to pay for it. Like all the little things that would perfectly work as I started moving into what his walk for me instead of my walk for me, when you're on your walk, it's resistance, things are hard. You feel like you're forcing stuff when you're on his walk, his path, things feel easy, seamless, more green, more fruitful, like it's just flowy.

Yeah. And then you, so you wrote down the plan for each of these things, but then also at the end of the month, you're writing down a reflection of all of those things and that's super important. Write it down and make it plain. That's what the Bible says. And you're writing down not only where you want to be and who you are and the steps you need to take it. But then you're writing down almost like a gratitude or a reflection of everything that he's done just in that short part time period. There's so many things that I've forgotten because I didn't take the time to write it down. So I'm doing more of that now as well. That's great advice. Yeah.

Yeah. So, okay. So we go here in 20, the end of 2016, beginning of 17, it was like, really this Valley was really rough and I stay at like, Oh, I just trusted that. Well, okay. I was also like looking for jobs. I was like, I'll just go back to corporate. I was looking at teaching kids, English at 2:00 AM because that's what I thought would make sense seriously. And I started making t-shirts on Amazon for $3, a certain prominence in case any of you were like panicking, trying to figure out your life. That is totally normal. You're not alone. However, I had a friend sit me down and she was like, we did some work together and I helped her get clarity on her life. I said, why aren't you using this 20 years of trauma you went through now, you've been healed. You've been in 15 years of therapy.

Why don't you do this self-love movement for women who need this? The stuff that you're gifted in. I gave her a name. I gave her a tagline and gave her a title and we're just sitting there. And like, we had taken a girl strip and this was like two hours of our time. And she just turned it in and she's like, can you sit down please? I was like, okay. And she's like, can you stop doing all the ridiculous things that you are doing? And you're panicking trying to figure out a way to make money. Can you stop doing that? And just be a clarity coach, because do you hear what you just did for my business? You have a gift. She said, I want to lick your brain. So that was, that was coined. We laugh about that still today on the lick your brain.

I was like, okay, things just got awkward, but I stared at her and it was like this massive breakthrough for me. Oh my goodness. This is what this is. I've had this my whole life. I didn't know. This was a thing. I'm a clarity coach. And so I right there in that moment, I'm like, let's go God. So I started doing lives. I started taking some clients. I was still trying to figure out my way, but I knew the direction I was going, going at the same time. Crazy boundaries. If I'm going to do business again, this is your way, God, this is your business. Not mine. I will be your mouthpiece. Speak through me, move me. Tell me when to turn it off. Tell me. And I've all. Yes, I've fallen. This has not been perfect, but I always readjust. I reset the boundaries.

I reset the sales and I go, so that was roughly mid 2017. And it was hard because the business wasn't growing well, I was still like struggling. Like, how do I grow? This? Is it the YouTube? Is it the blog? Is it the, what am I doing? Like I was everywhere. And it felt very exhausting. And I could feel myself creeping back into like workaholism in a way of like, or being afraid of that. Like, Oh, if I keep pushing this hard in all these places, I'm going to become old Stephanie again. And that did not feel good. And so at that moment, I'm like, I know what it is. God, it's the clarity coaching. I get it. It's helping these women rise out of their fear. Take massive action. Have the business that, that you have for them based on their books and heaven.

But how do I grow it? How do I do it? I was praying, praying, praying for months. Well, in 2018, an answer came in a dream and it was a very clear vivid, prophetic dream start a podcast. And I was like, huh. Okay, well, that sounds good. So I didn't really listen to podcasts at the time. I think I listened to one, had no idea how to start one, but I had a $20 microphone in the drawer in my office. And I made some Busta channel art on CAMBA. I hope that no one ever sees it. And I sat down on a microphone and I pressed record and I was like, what's up? Welcome to the show. And the rest is history. What happened was I was able to stop showing up everywhere else, show up on one platform, share my voice, share my heart consistently to being consistent, posit.

When my kids came in, it was like freeing. I could be myself. I didn't have to worry about being on video or doing makeup, which is not me. Anyway. It was like, I could just be raw me and I didn't know who was listening. And so it was kind of like, I just ripped the bandaid off. And I was like, this is what I am. This is what I stand for. It's online business and marketing paired with, with God and paired with ministry and doing business God's way. And I grew into it more and more and more over the past, over the years. But what happened was then my clients were like, well, how did you grow this business to be so incredible? And I'm like, well, the podcast is really the catalyst. So ended up creating a couple courses, teaching my students how to get clarity, start a show.

I was doing the coaching nonstop and then ultimately taking my clients how to, how to then create a course to monetize the podcast and all the while crazy boundaries, like partner with God and all of it. And he knew then I was ready. Right? Because you can't be ready for the flood Gates and the flood Gates open and you'll drown. You have to be prepared. And so he had been doing a lot of work in me behind the scenes from 2016 to 2019 when he was, when I was ready to steward that favor and provision and the business of that size when I was ready. And he knew it, flood Gates, Burstows open. And here I sit and it, it really feels like a dream because I'm the woman on the paper. Angie, that's so good. I think you, you

Made such a good point was that he was preparing you along the way. So it's not that you're just going to snap and things are going to happen and you're going to become that person on the paper immediately. But it's about your intentional actions and you're embracing where you are and where you want to go and figuring out how to get there and then listening and allowing God to change you and mold you and help you become more and more mature. It's the same thing that I say when I left my corporate job was, you know, it had, he asked me to do that 10 years ago, five years ago. There's no way I would have been mature enough or had enough identity in him to know that I can do that and steward that well, because he told me to and he's going to cover it. So I think that's such, such a good point that you make.

Yeah. Thank you. And that's all, I think a couple of big takeaways I want to share is that clarity is not overnight. So me ultimately finding my way to being a full-time entrepreneur that has an incredible audience. I have a team, I have boundaries. I work my business 30 hours or less per week. I know what I do without a shadow of a doubt. I know I'm walking in my purpose. Well, that only took nine years. Okay. So it's to tell you that you can't give up on seeking after your clarity, but you have to get out of your way. You are not the one that gets to decide what steps you make, what the opportunities are, what what's next, how to go bigger, how to it's God's going to open those doors for you. He's going to bring you the divine connections. He's going to give you that specific direction, do this, right?

Like you told Angie, you're going to leave the job. Don't worry. I got you. And here she is sitting in her purpose work. And her evolution of clarity is going to take a while. This is not overnight, but we all start somewhere. We start with that direction. And then we step out in faith and we know that when we wear the armor of God, that he will continue to do her to us. And he goes before us, he already knows the end of your story. We have to trust and have faith, big audacious faith. So we can achieve the God-sized dreams because they are bigger and better than our dreams will ever be.

Yeah. Amen. And the other thing that I was thinking about when you were saying that is that, you know, his dream for you is so above and beyond what you could ever even imagine. And it also is for other people. So, you know, for example, you and I are sitting here connected because he had a plan for us to be divinely connected so that you could help me create some clarity in walking through what I'm doing now at, in this, he knew that I was going to need Stephanie gas to be saying yes, and being obedient and stepping into her calling during, when I said, okay, I'll leave my corporate job and have no idea what I'm going to do. He knew that that connection would need to be there. And had you not taken those action steps and said your yes to him, then I wouldn't be sitting here. And, and Holy made life, wouldn't be sitting here. So it's so our gifts and our callings are so much bigger than us. And, and they're meant to impact so many people. And we just have no idea who it is and when it's going to be.

Yeah. I heard something once where someone said, if you don't say yes and amen to the calling, the purpose work and step out in that big, scary, really awkward faith, which is going to be, it's never comfortable to say yes to that. It's not, it's actually selfish because it's not about you, which is what you just said, but it's, it's not about us. It's about us operating in the perfect unity with the rest of God's kingdom. And so for, for me to do my work allows Angie to do her work allows one, some of you who are listening to Andrew and we'll work with Angie to do your work, it's all perfectly intertwined. They're having strings, right? We're on heaven's timeline. And it's like, I just have my daughter's perfectly orchestrated. But if one of us doesn't rise up into our authority, which we've all been given, but the Holy spirit, somehow that chain-link is broken.

And I don't know about, y'all like, I'm not going to be the one breaking the chains over here, I'm break the chains of the world and that kind of stuff. But like, I'm not going to break heaven's chains where he is trying to beautifully orchestrate all of us rising together to do work for his good and his glory. So just remember that next time. You're like, should I, should I try that thing? Should I pivot? Should I leave that job? Should I start that blog or that podcast? Or should I pivot what I'm good at for what I'm called to be? Whether that be more in your business or more with your kids or more with your spouse? Well, I think that you have to, because it's your responsibility to be the woman on the paper for your life.

Amen. Yeah. And I think it's praying over what it is, how it is. Cause you may or may not be wanting to leave your job, but you have a calling and maybe it's worked out within your job and that's where you're called to be. And so use it there. And maybe it's doing some other things in addition to your job. So it's, it's going to be specific to you and what God's calling you to do, but just be open to it and willing to become that person on paper that God's calling you to be. So we're getting towards the end of what I want to go back to real quickly, cause you brought up 2020, and we all know what a basket case the whole nation went to the whole world went to in 2020. Now obviously we knew that God is in control and we know that God has control, but you brought up a perfect vision being 2020. So in the natural 2020 is perfect vision. So can you give your revelation or a little bit of advice to women coming out of 2020 and how to use what we've learned or have a look for what we can learn from the season we just came out of related to 2020?

Yeah. So what's interesting is that you can't have the peaks without the valleys. And so you can't have the breakthrough without the breakdown. There's nobody that gets to just, you know, make it, have the incredible story without first the hard stuff without walking through the valleys, because that is where our soil is tilled, right? That is where we are prepared. That is where our heart is strengthened and our faith is grown. And so those are the tests we go through tests so they can become a testimony. So as you look back on 2020, and yes, some of it was hard, but some of it was beautiful. Some it was incredible. I want you to dig in and find the miracles, find the things that stretched you pushed, you, broke you down. Did you experience a loss, a job loss, a family member loss. Did your kids, were they home with you for a whole year?

Like mine while that was hard? It was extraordinarily beautiful. I told my husband, I'm like man soaking in the babies for a whole year. You know, one seven, one four. I'm like, this has been incredible. I've loved it, but I'm done soaking now. It's like, she's done. She's done soaking great. And praise God, my child, they're both back in school, at least half-time for now. But the point of that is I wouldn't have known them at this deep capacity that I know and see them. I wouldn't have understood their learning in this deep way. I wouldn't have been stretched to get to know my husband at this level, if he wasn't working from home for a whole year, that has been a beautiful growth experience for us. So there's fruit, there's fruit. Now that came through a seeming trial in the moment. So write down what are those trials you face in 2020?

And then I want you with fresh eyes, a prayer, fresh eyes, and a pen to look at that list and go, what fruit am I already seeing? And every month as you're doing that miracle and that praise report, look back at that list. You wrote about 2020 trials. And all of a sudden you're going to start to see correlation between the trial and the fruit, because the seeds are born in the trials. You're going to water them. You're going to grow through them. That you're going to trust. You're going to pray. You're going to continue to steward that. And then you're going to see the blossoms start to come through.

So then so good. Well, I want to thank you for being here. I want to let the community know how they can get in contact with you. So you've got the brand new branding of the Stephanie gas show but tell us how they can find you to listen more to you because I know I know the love you, and I know that want to do that

For sure. So you guys come hang out on my show. The podcast is the Stephanie gash show at the top 25 podcasts for Christian entrepreneurs who need help with their clarity work, want to grow an evergreen audience and do business God's life and business God's way. And then secondly, Stephanie gas.com. I have freebies over there, all the things. Then the last one is we have a Facebook community and you can just search for Bitly slash or just type in Bitly slash success support group. And those are the three places to come learn about me, get to know me and get some more support just like this. Yeah. Awesome. Thank you so much stuff. You're welcome. Thanks Angie. All right. See, I told you guys she's inspirational. She's so awesome. So I hope you enjoyed that. I know you enjoyed that and if you want to get any further clarification on your calling and how you can integrate your calling into your world, then I highly recommend that course called clarify your calling.

And like I said, I'll put the link in the show notes. If for some reason you can't find it, just email me at Angie, Tony Rogers at Gmail, and I'll get you connected. If you've ever thought about starting a podcast. I took her podcast pro university course, and that's where I learned how to do all the logistics about starting a podcast. So I know at least a handful of you guys have asked me questions about how did you start your podcast? How do you do this? How to do that. And this particular course is exactly what I did. I took it and it walked me through every step to starting my podcast. So I highly recommend that as well. And that can be found ppu.atrogers.com. And that link will be in the show notes too. Okay. All right guys. Well, if you have any other questions or feedback, get into my email box, AngietoniniRogers@gmail.com, and I'm happy to connect with you there. Don't forget to get over in our community Facebook group at Holy made life and I'll see you over there. All right guys, have a fantastic day.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women just like us. You're five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see you in the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

EP 26 Is Balance for Busy Working Moms Really Even Possible? The ONE GREAT IDEA That Could Change Your Life! Intentional Life Coach Private Coaching Session

EP 26 Is Balance for Busy Working Moms Really Even Possible? The ONE GREAT IDEA That Could Change Your Life! Intentional Life Coach Private Coaching Session

What is balance? What does that even mean? Because as you know, you know, as we work full time, as we are moms, wives, we are working in our church. We are serving and volunteering. We are the sports soccer mom. We are classroom mom. We are homeschooling kids, all of these different hats that we wear, how in the world do we create this balance? Every woman deserves to live her life, feeling fulfilled in every area of her life. Girl, Let’s walk this thing out together, you deserve your Wholly Made Life™!

Have you taken the assessment yet? Take it here!  http://bit.ly/shortassessment

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Wholly Made Life™ Short Assessment: http://bit.ly/shortassessment

Get the Podcast Episode Updates 1st: https://angie.gr8.com/

Tune in to the Nurses on Fire Podcast, with host Naseema McElroy on March 18th! 

https://www.financiallyintentional.com/podcast

Welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life™. How are you today? I am good. Thank you. Sometimes I wish there was a feedback where we could actually be talking so, but did you know that we can do that? We can talk. We can connect in real life. If you go over to my Facebook group, Holy made life and we can comment. We can play. We can hang out over there. So make sure if you haven't already go ahead and request to get into the Holy made life, private Facebook group, and it's free. There's nothing you need to do other than just go request it on Facebook. So Holy made life W H O L L Y made life™ just like the podcast. Okay. So today I want to talk about an interview that I just did with the host of nurses on fire Naseema.

And I was really excited to do this with her. She is fantastic. Is a matter of fact, I'm going to have her as a guest on this podcast because she has an incredible story about how she has paid off. I think up to a million dollars in debt, don't quote me on that, but I'm pretty sure her story includes that, but I know she paid off a ton of debt. She is a labor and delivery nurse working full time. She's got two kiddos. She's amazing. So she just wrote a book called smart money, the step-by-step personal finance plan to crush debt. And I binge read this, I got it on Kindle and I've been dreaded so you can get it on Amazon for your Kendall. And she has a hard copy too. I think it might still be on pre-order it's so new, but anyway, she goes through a nine step plan on how to get your finances back in order.

And I know some of you guys who have taken that Wholly Made Life short assessment. If you haven't already, you can click the link to take your short assessment in the show notes on the episode page. So go ahead and do that if you haven't. But some of those scores that I am seeing are related to feeling a little bit unbalanced for your finances. So this book is really helpful with that. It tells her story about how she paid off a ton of debt while working full time. And so it's really valuable. But what I was going to say is I'm going to have her on the podcast so she can tell you her story and walk through some of these things, these easy steps that you can start to take. And I know in the one episode that I did about finances and what does God say about money?

I talked about doing a savings account and making sure that you guys get to a place where you have a thousand dollars in savings. She recommends that as well. So, and if you haven't heard that episode, go back to the one that says, what does God say about money?

Find it at Episode 18==> What does God say about My Finances?

And it'll tell you a little bit about how you can go ahead and get a thousand dollars saved up in your savings account and how that will kind of free you to deal with any emergencies, things that come up like that. So anyway, I was on her podcast and that episode is going to release on nurses on fire next week on Thursday. And that date is what is that day going to be? That's going to be the 18th of March. So that will, if you want to listen to that, that will be up on her podcast and nurses on fire.

She's got a lot of great tips over there. So they feature all nurses. And of course you guys know I'm a nurse, she's a nurse. And so that's her specialty is she, she just showcases nurses with different stories and in different areas of your life. So it's a great podcast, whether you're a nurse or not. What I wanted to talk about today though, was she asked me a lot of questions about my coaching and my coaching program and what I'm providing and what I'm helping ladies with. And so the number one question she was asking was, okay, you talk about balance in your life. What is balance? What does that even mean? Because as you know, you know, as we work full time, as we are moms, wives, we are working in our church. We are serving and volunteering. We are the sports soccer mom.

We are classroom mom. We are homeschooling kids, all of these different hats that we wear, how in the world do we create this balance? And so what I explained was it's such an individualized thing because the real reality is, is that balance is going to look different for each person. And it's not what the society says. That balance is. It's not this perfect little pie where you have a full piece of pie and in every area of your life, it's not this perfect thing. It's going to ebb and flow depending upon the seasons of your life. And thankfully we're graced for the times where it's ebbing and flowing a little higher or lower in some of those areas of our life, where we're having to spend more time in our marriage or more time at work or more time because we're getting a business off the ground or more time because one of our kids is going through something.

So it's always going to ebb and flow. There's never, you're never going to have a perfect wheel. That's perfectly circular and full in every area of your life. All the time. The goal is, is to define what balance looks like for you based on your desires, based on what fills you up, based on the impact that has on your family and your job and your coworkers and your friends, and figuring out what that is, and then work within that definition of what balance is for you. So it's very individualized. So that's the first thing we do is I talk about the reality and get us out of this hole. We have to be perfectly balanced in every area of our life, all the time to be successful, because that's just a lie. You are successful already. You are already equipped with everything that you need to wear.

All the hats that you're being asked to wear. Sometimes it's related to your boundaries. And you've said yes, to too many things. And some of that gets identified when we talk about the reality and the definition of what balance is for you and what, where you need to be. Okay. So the second thing that I do once we have some of that defined for that person is we come up with an idea and that is an acronym for some of the steps that I use with my clients, an idea I D E a idea. So let me tell you quickly about what this acronym idea means. So the I in idea means to identify, we are going to identify what it is that is going on in your life, in all areas of your life, because the reality is until we even identify what that thing is, that's making you feel either uncomfortable or burnt out or stressed out or overwhelmed, or just in a place of restlessness or a place where you're not finding joy in either one or many areas of your life.

We have to identify that in the first place. A lot of you guys come to me and talk about where you are and not really understanding or knowing why you're feeling the way you're feeling, you're just feeling met, or you're just feeling blocked. You know, you're wearing that emoji that, that met emoji, and you're just walking through life every day. And it's kind of on repeat, but you're not really intentionally going after the things that make you feel filled up or spark that joy for you. So sometimes it's just a, not even realizing what it is that's causing these feelings in you, or not even realizing that, you know what, I don't remember the last time that I laughed or the last time that I found some joy in something and really thinking about, did I find any joy in anything that I did today?

And so it's just that honing in on that identification of that, there is something going on, we just need to figure out what it is. So we're going to identify the issue, the feeling, the emotion, the circumstance, the thoughts around those circumstances. We're going to identify that there's something that needs to change in the first place. So the second step is to define this is the D we're going to define what it would look like to spark that joy again, to put laughter back into your life, to feel balanced. What is it that balance is we're going to define the balance and we're going to identify what it is going on in each of those pieces of the pie and what, what it looks like to feel that joy again, to feel fulfilled in those areas. What does that look like? You don't know if you're winning in something you don't know.

If you are meeting a goal in something, unless it's defined. Sometimes we have this big, huge, audacious thought of what each area of your life should look like in your spiritual, your physical, your relational, et cetera. But we don't really know what that means for you. You know, you're, we're just going by what society says that we should look like, feel like be doing in each of these areas of our life, but you haven't really defined those areas. Well, what would make you happy in those areas? What would make you feel joyful and fulfilled? What would make your kids and your husband and your friends and your coworkers feel fulfilled in these areas? What is, what is it? You have to define it. You got to know what you're going after in order to get there. You can't just get in your car and say, I'm going to go to Hawaii and not have a plan and just start driving.

Because at that point, if you don't ever reference a goal, a direction, a plan, you won't get there. You've got to have a definition of where it's going. And you know, actually in the define stage, you don't even know that you're going Hawaii. You just know you're getting in your car and driving, but where are you going? I mean, none of us do that, right? We don't get in our car and just start driving around, not knowing where we're going. Unless that's something that fills you up to just go take a drive and be by yourself. Now that's a different situation. Okay. But in as far as destination and getting to a goal, you got to know when you get into your car where you're going to go so that you know how to get there. Okay. So that's the second step define the third step is going to be embrace E M B R a C E embrace.

Cause we got to do two things here. We've got to embrace what it is that we individually are defining as what would feel successful for us and be okay with that. Despite what other people are saying, despite what other people are defining for us, we have to define that ourselves and embrace that we have to be ready and fully ready to accept what it is that we define as success. Okay. You know what, in the mornings, if I get my kids to school on time, that's a success to me. It doesn't really matter. Everything in between the end goal is did they get to school on time? Were they dressed? You know, where are they fed? Do they have what they need? Did they get their backpacks? I mean, this morning I got not halfway, maybe a third way to school. And my youngest is like, Oh my gosh, we only have one shoe.

And I was like, you've got to be kidding me. Okay. So I was in a frenzy like, Oh my gosh, we got to turn around. And I'm like, how in the world you get in the car with no shoe on. And my other one, my middle one, Elijah was like, Oh yeah, I saw that ball at the car. And I was like, Oh, what in the world? How do you see this shoe fall out of the car? And you don't say anything and tell him, Hey, get your shoe. It just fell out of the car. He was like, I don't know. I was on the, on my phone with my dad. I'm just like, and then I forgot. And I was like, Oh my gosh. So, you know, had I defined success in, you know, did I make sure my kid, my 11 year old, my fifth grader had his boat issue on.

Then I'd be like, okay, I totally bonded today as a parent, I bombed, but I got them to school on time still. So despite the fact we had to turn around, come back and get the shoe, which was on the garage floor. And get turned back around and get them to school. They both made it on time and nobody was harmed. Okay. So that was a success. Okay. So it's important how you define those things and you know what? I have to embrace it. It just is what it is. Stuff happens. Life happens and it doesn't make me a bad parent. It doesn't make him a bad kid. We got to school on time. Everybody had their shoes on. Everybody had what they needed. They had their backpacks, they have their masks and it's all good. Okay. So we're going to embrace our definition of what success is.

Okay. And we're going to work on that because that may be, especially for a recovering perfectionist, like myself, that would have been something I would have beat myself up about, but you're like, Oh my gosh, I can't do anything. Right. I can't even make sure my kid has two shoes before we get in the car. Like, I'm horrible. I'm a failure as a mom. That's where that would have gone to in the past. But at this point, no, I'm not going to define it that way. I'm going to embrace that. Life's going to happen. Things aren't going to be perfect. They're not going to go exactly. As we thought, I didn't plan on turning around this morning and getting back, but we did it and we made it and everybody's living and we're all good. Okay. So we're going to embrace what it is that we define it.

And we're going to continually work on our mindset and our thoughts and our feelings that come around that what our definitions have been so that we don't end up beating ourselves up when things don't happen exactly as they are. And when they don't measure up to that whole perfectionist expectation. Okay. Cause that's not real. All right, we're going to break that. And there, we're going to embrace that action plan, that, that goal that we build for ourselves to get us to where we are and we're going to embrace that life happens. And sometimes we're going to meet it and sometimes we're not. Okay. So we're going to do a lot of mindset work during this embrace stage. The final letter in this acronym is a, and this is going to be to activate. This means that we're going to take action. We're going to move into action.

So we're going to come up with a plan of action, small steps that are attainable and manageable. When you look at them, you say, yes, I can do that today. We're going to look at one step at a time, one small action at a time because we know that all the small things that we do on a daily basis build up to bigger things. Your small action steps you take every day, we'll come to bigger things, bigger accomplishments. They, everything adds up. It's like compounded interest. Okay. You take little steps today. And it gets the same little step tomorrow will compound on the little steps we took yesterday. That's where we get results. And by the way, it's opposite to, in a negative way, the little steps we don't take today can add up to bigger things tomorrow. So it's kinda like, I think about when you are trying to eat healthier and you choose to eat a piece of cake, which by the way I do.

Okay. I am not the epitome of an example of physical health at this point or not health, but physical small steps. So, you know, there's some times I choose not to do the workout. There's sometimes I choose not to order the baked fish instead of the fish and chips, like right now on Fridays, those kinds of things. So there are some things that happen, but if I make those choices every single day, then my bigger outcome down the road will show that my body will not be as strong, not be as spit, not be as toned. I will gain weight. So it's not about one small step you didn't take and you beat yourself up. So then you say, okay, well, I chose that. So now I'm going to choose the ice cream and the chips and everything else. Okay. It's about the consistent small actions we're taking and not letting one small decision we make or small action we do, or don't take ruin the rest of our little decisions.

All right. So I don't want you to beat yourself up on that, but so it's about consistency. It's about taking small actions and understanding that these small actions will result in bigger things and you have to just be accountable to whatever that bigger thing is. If I don't like the way I look in the mirror, I don't like the way my pants are fitting. Then I have to start taking smaller actions. It's not about anything else other than me and my action plan. Okay. All right. So in the activate stage, again, small action plans, or I'm sorry, a plan to take small action steps every single day that are attainable, you can feel good about and an understanding that your big results are going to come in the future. They're not going to come today, but today you can embrace what your plan is. You can embrace the, the mindset that you can decide, how you feel about the action steps you've taken today.

And if you don't feel good about it, then you take different action steps tomorrow or later today. Okay. Just cause you take, don't do what you wanted to do an hour ago doesn't mean that you can't make good choices and good on your action plan to right now. Okay. So identify, define, embrace, and activate. That is how we work in the coaching program individually to come up with a way that you can feel good about getting yourself to where you feel more balanced. Okay. All right. Any questions about that? Please email me at Angie, tonyRogers@gmail.com. I will be accepting private clients. And if you have questions about the coaching menu, a half-hour session, our session, and I will email you back and we'll discuss what you're looking for and whether or not it's a good fit for us to work together. Okay. All right, guys, thank you so much.

And again, don't forget to tune in to the Thursday episode next week on the 18th on nurses on fire to hear the interview that I did with miss Nisima and I we'll have her on our podcast here in the near future to talk specifically about how she was able to pay off a ton of debt. Okay. She's got a great action plan that I think it's simple for any of us to follow, especially when we're talking and breaking it down into little action steps. The other big announcement that I have is that I am so, so excited to announce that I am going to be interviewing Ms. Stephanie gas. She has this Stephanie gas show. It was mompreneur mastermind show, but now it is the Stephanie gas show. She just rebranded. This is my personal friend and mentor and coach. She has actually helped me with all things podcasting.

The whole reason why I even have the title that I do was that I had personal coaching sessions with her. She helped me with all of my jumbled ideas that I had and she helped me hone it in. And we prayed about it. She is a Christian coach and she prays with her clients. It's amazing. Really? So anyway, I am going to have her on a podcast episode because she is going to talk with us about how to balance our professional piece of the pie. She's amazing. She's done amazing work. And if you haven't already looked at or listened to her show, it's the Stephanie gas show. G a S S take a listen, but she is going to be a special guest. I'm interviewing her next week. So it should drop an episode with her interview in the next couple of weeks. Okay. So I'm really excited about that. I also have some other exciting guests that I am booking to interview. So I'm going to have some great things for you guys coming up. I'm really excited about it and I hope you guys are too. All right, guys, don't forget. Hit me up on the Facebook group. Get in that Facebook group so that we can live this thing out together. Okay. All right, girls, I love you guys. And we will see you on the next episode.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us. You're five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

EP 25 Why Boundaries will Save your Life- Crucial to Success- Visiting the Grand Canyon- Revelation What God has for Busy Moms, Daughters- Family Chat

EP 25 Why Boundaries are Crucial to Your Success Visiting the Grand Canyon Revelation about What God Has for Busy Moms Daughters Family Chat

Hey, welcome back to this special episode. And this is an episode where I'm going to do a little chat with my sister and my mom. And I just reflect on the fact that those boundaries are meant for our good, and you know, if you want to bring that into your inner life and what kind of got asks of us or the rules and regulations that we can sometime feel constricted by, we can think to ourselves, these are for our good, so good. These boundaries are for our good. So when we stray outside of that, we're really going outside of that safety net, that protection that God wants for us. And I mean, I had a visceral reaction to seeing people creeping along that edge, even when I was holding tightly onto a fence post kind of peering over my legs were jelly. And I didn't even want my nephew kind of like leaning against the thing. It was terrifying and I think to myself, why would I then, you know, if, if that's what I feel in the temporal world with my temporal life, why would I put my eternity on at, to put it at risk by stepping outside of the boundaries that God has, has put for me?

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We took a trip to Arizona this week and we've been here to visit my oldest Clayton. It was about time for mama bear to lay eyes on her Cub. So that's what we did. And it was awesome. We surprised him. He was really, really surprised, but I just wanted to take a little time to have a little chat about some of our experiences and go from there. So Chrissy is my sister. So Chrissy, why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?

Well, hello. I am Chrissy and I am 41. I'm a stay at home, mom of five kiddos. My oldest is 18 and my youngest is eight. I have four girls and one young man, boy.

So you're a girl mom with one boy.

I'm A girl with one boy and I am a formal homeschooling mom. I stopped homeschooling about four years ago, but I had homeschooled for probably about 10 years. All including maybe a little longer with some stragglers that I kept home for a little while after my oldest went to school, I, like I said, stayed home with my kids and support my husband, who is, who runs a tech company. So he's extremely busy all the time and outside of COVID doesn't or is not home super often because he is all over the world. So it's important for me to stay home and kind of keep things grounded. Yeah. All right, cool. Yeah, that's my SIF.

Y'all okay, mom,

This is mom. Hi, my name's Debbie and I am retired. I've been retired about, I guess since 19 or 20 and since 2014. Oh yeah, it's been that long. Yeah, it's been that long and I retired to actually take care of my mom and for about four years. So she was about 90 when I retired which was a great experience and maybe another podcast, but let's see. Before I retired, I was an office manager for an assisted on national, well actually international assisted living company. So I've got the two girls. Do, you know, Andrea and Chrissy and are their younger brother is a Molly son. So that's about it. That's about me. Yeah.

And you're right now, you're living the boating life.

My husband and I have had boats and we've taken some really good trip. We bought a boat up in the Chesapeake Bay and traveled down the intercoastal all the way down to Florida and stayed there for a winter. And then we took it on around to a little place called Demopolis, Alabama. And we've stayed there for several years now. We finally sold the boat and bought another one because my husband couldn't stand it. He had to, he had to have another boat. So now we're going to have a new adventure up in Lake Michigan for awhile.

That's really cool. Yeah. Yeah. So

My, my children think I'm a little bit crazy, but other than that, yeah,

That's not true. It's just a different lifestyle living the boating lifestyle or sail building and that kind of thing. It's just a whole nother lifestyle, so right. But it's been an interesting winter for you because before now you guys have been gone to warmer climates and instead of having to live through ice storms and snow and all that. So this was your first winter. So coming out to Arizona during this week was awesome. I don't know if you guys have ever visited or if you live in Arizona, I want to come visit you. So email me and we can split the visit, but I love Arizona. This is my second time here. I love it. What did you guys think about Arizona? We're in Phoenix, by the way.

It's wonderful. It's it's just glorious is Andrea said, yeah.

Chrissy said that a million times is glorious. It has been glorious.

Yeah. It's great to get out of the great white North was my home for her is my home. And this winter has not been super kind as far as snow and weather is concerned. So the warm, glorious sunshine was very welcome.

Yeah. And I think it too especially after the season that we've had, where we've been so isolated and separated, that's a whole nother issue, but being able to spend this time with just us, the, you know, my sister and my mom and spending time together and beautiful, just beautiful, trained to look at beauty or beautiful landscaping such a different thing that we can get to see. And then I think that just goes into, you've got to do things to take care of yourself and spend that time with family. I mean, for me, I'm in that season where family time has been so important and I'm trying to really maximize the opportunities I have since I'm not working full time right now. It's been the first time in really in my life since I'm able to take this time. So I, you know, had I been working full time, I wouldn't have been able to take this opportunity. So it's been really cool.

It's also been cool being here with our, with my oldest grand child and just loving on him for three days just by itself. It's you, that's a whole nother thing because he's learned so much about being around three women.

Oh yeah. Oh my gosh. The whole time he was like, you guys have deep talks about everything. Like there's nothing that came up that you guys didn't turn into a deep talk. I'm like, yeah, welcome to, you know, womanhood. Okay.

It's nice for me because I live far away from my family of origin. And so yeah, it was nice to spend time with my sister-in-law, who I do not get to spend time with very often. Maybe the last time I saw them as June. So

Yeah. Very good. Yeah.

All right. So we went to the grand Canyon which was just breathtaking. Amazing. Okay. Yeah. So let's talk a little bit about, because for me every time, like this is my second time going. Cause I went when we dropped Clayton off the first time for college, but the first time I went, I was just taken aback by how vast and majestic and just breathtaking it was. And I just also in relation to how small I am in this world and how big God is. And even though God is so big and the world is so big and I feel so small that it's, you're still meant in purpose to make a big, huge world changing impact, even as small as we are. So that was one of my revelations that I had when I first went. So you guys talk about what you guys thought about that grand Canyon Chrissy. Wow.

So aside from walking up and just, you, you kind of walk up sort of an incline and you don't really know exactly what to expect, except what you've seen, you know, in pictures or whatever, and you walk up and all of a sudden it's there and it almost makes you weak in the knees, just the vast majesty of it. But one thing that I just kind of came to my mind was the value of boundaries. So when you're walking along the rim of the grand Canyon, there are many places that are fenced along the walkway, and there are many places that are not, and you saw people creeping out along the edges to get a better view or, you know, scrambling down essentially the face of a cliff to try to get, you know, that cool picture or whatever. And we came to know that there have been many, many deaths of people doing that just slipping.

And I just reflect on the fact that those boundaries are meant for our good, and you know, if you want to bring that into your inner life and what kind of got asks of us or the rules and regulations that we can sometime feel constricted by, we can think to ourselves, these are for our good, so good. These boundaries are for our good. So when we stray outside of that, we're really going outside of that safety net, that protection that God wants for us. And I mean, I had a visceral reaction to seeing people creeping along that edge, even when I was holding tightly onto a fence post kind of peering over my legs were jelly. And I didn't even want my nephew kind of like leaning against the thing. It was terrifying and I think to myself, why would I then, you know, if, if that's what I feel in the temporal world with my temporal life, why would I put my eternity on at, to put it at risk by stepping outside of the boundaries that God has, has put for me?

I'm going to tell you right now, I had a lot more joy in my life, stepping away from that fence. I could still see the absolute gorgeous beauty, and it was still extremely moving. There's a verse in Psalms that says, leave me to a rock that is higher than I, and that is the verse that kept going into my mind. And that kept grounding my spirit. And I just was so grateful Lord that you lead me there, that you set my feet firmly on a rock that is higher than I, it gives you vision. It gives you visibility. It lets you see clearer, you know, see things from afar. It's just great. So all of that was a little muddled, but that's my thoughts.

That's that was beautiful. That was amazing. So good. I mean that to think about boundaries being something that keeps us safe and you know, I've talked about building those boundaries and keeping those boundaries, even when it feels uncomfortable or even when it feels a little constricting or even when it feels like you might hurt somebody else's feelings, but those boundaries are there for us to thrive and to succeed and wow. What a good, what a good revelation. That was awesome.

Well, you all pretty much said it all. I mean, and what I would like to say is that my daughters are amazing. [inaudible] We get it from our mama? Oh, well they just teach me, they teach me things all the time. Each, each one of them in their own way. And my son is teaching me as well. So it's,

It's just from my standpoint of being a, you know, an older parent of older children, you can relax in the older part [inaudible] retiree. Yes, yes. What I'm trying to say is I learn from them every day and that was beauty. Yeah, it was. Yeah. Well I think it's just, it's a good thing to just, first of all, always reflect on everything going on in your life, but when you have an opportunity to reflect on something as vast, and if you haven't been to the grand Canyon, I know that you've seen pictures. It does nothing to the justice of what it is that you will experience in person. I mean, I've been now twice and I would go again and again and again, it just is such a great reminder of how big our God is. And I love that what you said, Chrissy. That was really good. So it's cool

All to, to think of the grand Canyon and think, you know, you've seen it and sometimes we have a tendency to be like, okay, check. You know, for me, this is a bucket list item for me, this is something that I have just dreamed about doing. Now. I will say, I did not want to do this, or I do want to do this with my children and my family. I do. And I always have, you know, for a long time, I will say, I'm very hesitant to do that at the moment because it's somewhat terrifying seeing the absolute sheer drop-offs right. So, so we'll see how it went and where that happens or when that happens. But I will say like when I was thinking about the grand Canyon, like since I've been there, it's like, there was so many things I wanted to explore.

There were so, so much that was untapped. You know, I wanted to go down in there to kind of see what it was like from all the different perspectives I wanted to, you know, take a Jeep tour down and like, just get like the guides experience and understand, you know, more about it. I wanted to see the river and the bottom of the Canyon. I went to hike in there. I'm wanting to do all those things. And I just, there were so many avenues you could take to explore the same thing. Right. And it was very different. You know, my sister-in-law before I left, asked me, are you going to get on, you're going to take him donkey ride down into the Canyon at two, which I answered a hard pass. No, I'm not doing that. So that's not necessarily one of the things I wanted to try, but I don't know. I think there's kind of an interesting thing to reflect on there. Like, you know, you can do something, but there's always more depths. You can plumb, I guess there's always more avenues you can take to explore it from a different angle to, to see new beauty, to see, you know, with fresh eyes. So I'm excited to come back and to do those things and spend some time there if I can. Yeah.

Well, and you brought up fear kind of. Well, that was what, just what I was thinking about when you're thinking about cause it's, I mean, your brain tries to protect you. And so when you're on that edge, even if there's a fence there, your brain can't, it's like it can't take in everything that you're seeing and it can't figure out what to tell your body to do. So your stomach is in the pit and your legs are jelly. You know, and you're, you're being a lot more careful in you're walking a lot more carefully, obviously, hopefully, I mean, we were, but it's at the same time, it's understanding what those boundaries are and living fully within those boundaries and not allowing fear to stop you from taking those steps and taking those actions and enjoying and taking in all of the wonder of what's happening around you.

So making sure that you are keeping the fear in perspective to the opportunity you have to experience what it is that you're experiencing and for the grand Canyon, it's, you know, yes, you're going to have jelly legs. Yes. You have a little bit of that pit in your stomach of all those what ifs, but you are still enjoying that, that experience within the boundaries that are safe for you to do so. So you know, God is a very good God and he gives a lot of grace in mercy. And we know that fear is not of him. Now that doesn't mean that he wants us to make stupid choices or do things that are

Risky. There's a type of fear that God put in us. And it's that sort of it's like that fear where you snatch your child back from a road that he's going to cross without looking that rear, when you say you need to come away from that edge right now, because that's like an innate thing that is a healthy thing that God gives us that like response so that we can remain, you know, in that safe environment. Right.

Wisdom and discernment are the words that I think of when you're talking about that. So yeah,

There's something else just popped into my head is it gives, I found myself covering other people, strangers with some prayers like gods, you know, it's like, they're walking to the edge and you can just tell they're not respecting their boundaries basically. And you know, it gives you a chance to send out some prayers

For people that may need them for whatever purpose.

Yeah, that's right.

I definitely found myself doing that as well. Yes. That and turning away and hiding my eyes when I thought people were being ex or especially risky. Yeah. It was hard.

Yeah. Well, and I think sometimes we forget that we need God and we need his direction. We need the Holy spirit to guide us and lead us. And you know, when we are, it's kinda, it reminds me of ego a little bit. Like we are thinking that we are more in strength or more powerful than we are. We're bigger than we are and we still need to be reverent. And we still need to succumb to the fact that we still are choosing to walk this path for God, for his glory. And you know, just the need to still walk within those boundaries. And within the structure of everything is for his glory, not our own gratification, not our own pushing the boundaries to see how far we can go to the edge or how low, you know I'm having trouble putting that into words I think. But

I think it gives you a pause to ask yourself, you know, if you find yourself wanting that next thrill, that next thing that may or may, may be outside of what God is asking of you or those boundaries. I think it gives you pause to think, you know, let me explore that. Why am I thinking that, what am I after two to really explore the purity of your heart and the purity of your intentions, and then ask, you know, invite God into that and just say, you know, I'm feeling this way, or I don't understand why you ask this of me. You know, if you're in a particular season in life where something that you know is one of his statutes or what he asks of you is harder. You have to sometimes invite him there to say, okay, Lord kind of lead me here, ask me, or, you know, speak to me here.

But ultimately if you want to live in the Lord, I have found personally that sometimes you just have to acquiesce and say, you know, I don't understand this, but your thoughts are above my thoughts and your ways are above my way. So I'm going to surrender my knowledge. And I think that's kind of what you were pointing to, which is like your own yeah. Thought processes, your own knowledge, your own knowledge. You have to surrender that sometimes. And so that's kind of when you were saying that, that's what I was thinking like yeah. Sometimes we have to just say, okay, I don't know this, so Lord, I invite you here to help me, but for now I'm going to surrender that so I can continue to walk in your ways and walk with you. Right.

Yeah. That's good. So what else, anything else that you guys can think of that would be important to share about this experience with the grand Canyon?

Well, I don't know if this has any value to this particular podcast, but there has my sister-in-law, I have a Bible study at my house and my sister-in-law encouraged everyone last year during 2020 to make a list of 10 things that you wanted to be bold and sort of ask God for you wanted not like to test him, but just to say, you know, Lord, I'm really praying into these dreams maybe, or these 10 things. One of mine was kind of funny, but one of mine, so two times in my life, I have seen the sky at night in such brilliance that my mom used the word. It was just an absolute blanket of stars. Right. so that's happened two times in my life and you have to be in a very, very dark and pretty rural place for it and a clear sky for it to really just be as brilliant as it is.

Right. Do we get that? It can be kind of encourage you if you've never seen it to actually pray for this because it is mind blowing. So one of the things on my list last year was I wanted to see the sky like that. Again, stars have always spoken to me. It's just been something that kind of feeds my soul nature in general. Always does. I always meet God, very intently in nature. He speaks to me loudly there. So this was one of my things. So as we're driving back from the grand Canyon, it's really, really dark during some of those roads. There are no streetlights. It is dark, dark. So I saw the star and the skies were clear. I saw the star starting to peak out and I started getting excited and I'm like real, like just every time, minute, I'm like pressing my face to the windshield with my hands, like cupped around my eyeballs so that I can block out the light of the dashboard and everything else.

And as it comes, it's just magnificent the whole star, the whole sky breaks out in these in these brilliant, brilliant, like blanket of stars. And so my soul is just kind of soaring at this point. And I'm like praying to Lord. I'm like, you know, I, I just, I kept saying, I gotta pull over. Like, but there just was no safe place to pull over. You can't do that. It's like 75 miles an hour on that road, you know, I'm minimum. And so I'm, I'm, I'm praying. I'm like, Lord, thank you. This is just, it's beautiful. Like even though I can't stop and like just lay there and just soak it in. I know. And so in my heart, I heard like this isn't the last time you're going to see this. Like I just wanted you to know that I heard your prayer.

And I was like, it was like, he was just smiling watching me look at this because he could see my heart storing. And I just, the word that kept coming is abundance. Like, Lord, you love me and abundance. Like this was for me, like I wanted this so much. And it was something I asked you specifically for a silly little thing, you know, in reality, but you gave it and you're like, that's not all it's not over. You'll you'll, you know, this will happen again. Basically. I don't know. That was my, that was my little extra. That's all

Awesome. I mean, I love that. And that's so important for this conversation because it is about, you know, making your dreams plain, by writing them down, you write the vision, make it plain. And you did that. You, you, you talked about asking boldly for what it is that you want and dream. I mean, God's put those desires and those dreams in our heart and whatever he's put into our heart is going to be something that he's going to give us an abundance and he's going to give us opportunities, but we have to stop to look for them. We have to trust that he's going to give those to us, but we also have to do our part. It's not just about sitting around and waiting for God. You know, you could have driven in that car the whole way home and not ever even asked about we've got something happening outside of our window here, but so sorry for the extra noise, but you could have just driven and not even sought out an opportunity to make that dream become a reality. Now he made it become a reality and he was speaking to you through that, but you had to be open and intentional about looking for it. Yeah. So that's, that's so good. We have to do our part in that. So,

And I will say I had to look a little foolish doing it, like my whole face with like plus pressed the windshield. It was doing the same thing.

Yeah. But that's a good point because sometimes we, you know, that reminds me of the huge thing I've done recently where I'm, I'm, you know, leaving a six figure salary to follow what the Holy spirit told me to do, which was to give it up to him as an offering. And he would show me what's next. And I had no idea what's next, but, so that looks foolish to a lot of people. I mean, it looked foolish to me, but as God's speaking to me and telling me to do that, then you have to be bold and courageous and, and take that step. And whether it's something like wanting to see a blanket of stars and the pitch black again which that speaks to, you know, you're in a dark rule, rural cold place, but there's still light for, to be seen. That was, that's so good to that preaches, you know, on its own as well, but we still have to do our part. We have to take those steps and that's, you know, you would not have had that experience. Had you not been intentional about taking that step? And that's the other thing too about writing things down is that it, it, it does something to us to be more intentional about taking those steps, to make those things on paper or make those things that we've prayed for a reality in partnership with God.

That's important. It's funny because I'm not a dreamer by nature. I don't. In fact, a lot of the times we'll be doing a Bible study or you'll be talking with friends or you'll be kind of listening maybe to a podcast, you know, someone will say, you know, what are your dreams? What are your dreams? And I'm always like, none. I don't know. I don't have dreams. I'm just not that type of person. I know people that they could tell me, you know, take off 10 things that they big, old, big ideas that they have, that they have dreams about. You know, I'm just not one of them. And my friend and I were having this conversation last Friday and she said, you know, what are your dreams? And I was like, and I told her what I just said, like, I don't dream, but I've been intentionally like, thinking about that over the last week because of that conversation. And, you know, I guess I just wanted to encourage for those of you that are like me, that don't, you know, quote unquote dream, you know, maybe it starts little like that, that blanket of stars, like that is something that was just a deep desire on my part. So anyway, yeah, if you're not, if you're not a dream or that you're not alone.

And I think too, that it's just speaks to each of us are so different that it, he speaks to us and puts those desires and dreams in our heart and in our thoughts and our mind in our experiences in different ways, just like he speaks to us in different ways. You know, you might hear for him as a small whisper or you feel it in your heart, you might hear it in a worship song. You might have it have a dream. I am not, I don't have, he doesn't really speak to me in dreams, but I feel a small whisper sometimes. I, I think most of the time it happens in my mind, I think about something. And then I feel it in my heart, I get kind of this reaction. So he just speaks to us in different ways and all of us have been designed and perfectly made in the way he needs us to be made so that you walk out those dreams and those desires offered his worry. So, yeah. That's important to talk about that. Yeah.

You know, one thing I noticed was when we were talking about with Clayton, you know, he said he never went on hikes. He never, you know, I don't think that he would have naturally just sat there and looked up at the stars, but when you and I were doing it, he leaned over and he started looking and I could tell that he was in all of it himself, you know? And then when we took that height to that park that he had been to, but it never explored, it was like he hit his, all of seeing what he was seeing and now he wants to go hike it. He wants to explore nature more and, and, you know, so the effect that this trip had on him, just to see, I guess God's beauty. I, you know, well, and that's something new. Yeah.

Yeah. And I think that's good. Yeah. I think that's good because too, the other thing is that sometimes our dreams aren't for us, they're for other people. So just like, you know, we came to visit him and to kind of lay eyes on him and, and you prepare him for the next couple of months before he gets to come home. And that was a satisfying my own mama bear needs. And but it, some of the things that we talked about, some of the things that we did to experience, he then benefited from that. So it's just important to remember that those desires and dreams that he has given us are not always for us. They're not, it impacts others. Yeah. Yeah. It, you know, we might benefit from it, but it's the, it's those that those dreams and desires and actions and bold, those bold courageous actions that we take based on our desires and dreams are meant for others, sometimes they're meant to impact others. So I'm voicing them too. Yeah. So that's good.

Anything else? This was an awesome little chat. I loved it. I hope that you guys also loved it and, you know, I think it's just to close out. I there's so many things that I reflected upon these last three days, it was packed with a lot of action in a lot of schedules, but it also was just so refreshing to spend time with family and to think about all the things that God has for us. And I just think it's such a good thing to take time and be intentional about the time. So yeah, this noise that we've got going on is distracting. So sorry about that guys. I know, right. They had to start right here on this corner where we're staying, we're staying in this little apartment, so

Yeah. But yeah. Thank you for inviting us to have a conversation and reflect more deeply about our week. It was fantastic. And thanks for inviting me. Yeah. Thank you guys. Thanks to my husband for a whole number four.

I know mine too. All right, guys. So tune in for the next episode and you know, we want to say a quick hello since I've got Chrissy and Mimi on

We want to say a quick hello to Mary grace because Mary grace is Christie's youngest,

Man. She's a big fan of this show. It's the cutest. Yeah.

Ever Mary grace. I love you, baby. So shout out to you now you're on the podcast. Okay. It's so cute. Yes. But anyways, thank you guys for listening and don't forget to hop on over. If you haven't already leave a review, I'd love to hear what you guys thought about this episode of me talking to my sister and my mom about our experiences. So if you liked it, go ahead and put a review in and give us some, give us those five stars and maybe we'll do some more episodes like this. Okay. Thank you guys. Have an awesome day.

 

EP 24 Secret to Multi-Tasking for Busy Moms- Focusing on One Thing at a Time Can Make You Most Effective. Productivity for Homeschooling or working Moms every day planning

EP 24 Secret to Multi-Tasking for Busy Moms- Focusing on One Thing at a Time Can Make You Most Effective. Productivity for Homeschooling or working Moms every day planning

In order to be successful at being a busy, working mom, you have to be the best at multi-tasking, right? The biggest myth in the world is that multitasking is able to occur. The reality is you cannot be efficient. You can not be safe and you can not get things done. If you think that you can multitask.

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Hey ladies, welcome back to Wholly Made Life. And today we're going to talk about something that I think almost every woman that I know really struggles with and really feels like they have to do to be successful. So if we have to do it, then I want to give us a tip or two to think about so that we can feel more successful in doing it. And that thing is multitasking and learning how to focus.

Now I will apologize ahead of time for the audio on this. Some of this is a portion of a YouTube video audio, and some of it is through a microphone. So the audio was a little bit off and there was a little bit of background noise. So I'll go ahead and apologize for that upfront. Okay. So give me grace and forgive me. Okay, ladies. All right. Let's get into today's episode today. I want to talk to you about focus. Once you're able to learn how to focus, you can be so much more productive and get so many more things done. And then success starts to come a little bit easier. First off, I want to let you know that the average number of minutes that a person can devote to a project before being interrupted or distracted is only 11 minutes. So you have 11 good minutes before you get distracted.

And once you're distracted, it takes about 23 minutes to get yourself back on track. So minor distractions, such as a click on your phone, when a text message comes through or a Facebook or email comes through on your, as you're working on something else, it can cause huge consequences for you because if you are interrupted every 11 minutes and then it, after that interruption is, is completed, then it takes 23 minutes to get back on task. You are wasting a lot of your day. So we have to learn some techniques in order to get yourself back on focus. The biggest myth in the world is that multitasking is able to occur. The reality is you cannot be efficient. You can not be safe and you can not get things done. If you think that you can multitask. Now, nothing I talk about is black and white, but to demonstrate this point, I watched a video and it was a team of basketball players wearing all white.

And there was a man on the video giving me a specific task. And the task was to count how many times the basketball players passed the ball after the video it stopped. And it said, how many passes the basketball team did? Now? The hard part was not how many passes and counting to get that correct number. The hard part was that there was actually a black Moonwalking bear. So it was a black bear like that you would see in the Tennessee mountains. And it was Moonwalking in the video, in between, on all around the players. But because the man had asked me to complete a task of counting, how many passes the basketball players made. I completely missed the black bear. That was Moonwalking through the video. So in this video he then says, so there were 33 passes, but did you see the Moonwalking bear?

So this video just demonstrates that it is really very difficult for us to be really good at two things at once. We might be good at a lot of things, but to do all of them at once is quite a challenge. And so when we think of multitasking, this is what we're talking about. It's, we're putting ourselves out there in all of these different ways at the same time. And it's really difficult for us to be successful at completing all the tasks all at once. Now, if we separate those tasks, we might be rockstars, but if we are putting all those tasks in together and trying to complete them all at once, that's when we stopped dropping those balls. Okay. So this video, and if you look for Moonwalking bear counting or basketball passes, then you might be able to find it on YouTube. It's just a YouTube video.

Okay. So basically it's easy to miss something you're not looking for is what that says. And that is so true. The Bayer was there the entire time, but what happened was you were focused on the guys and the white making passes, and you were trying to complete that task, complete that direction. And because you were focused on that, didn't see the bear. And so then when he drew your focus or your attention to the fact that there is a Moonwalking bear, you were looking for the bear and when the bear came, it was easily seen. I was actually so shocked that I rewound it to the beginning and watched it again. And even worse is that I knew that this video had a Moonwalking bear in it, because we had heard about this video in a training that I was in and they couldn't get the video to work.

So they told us there's a Moonwalking bear and most people miss it. So I thought that I could knowing that there was a Moonwalking bear going to cross the video. I could complete the task while also watching for the bear. But what I found was, even though I was trying to multitask and do both things at once, and I knew the bear was coming, I totally missed the bear because I was trying to, to also complete the task that he asked me to complete. So it just goes to show you that it is not effective to do two things at once. I mean, it's impossible for your brain to effectively focus on two things at once you think about doing an email and then maybe your husband or your child has said something to you and you're nodding your head. Yes. And then they look at you, like, do you even hear what I was saying?

And then you look up and say no, I, no, I don't. I was only half paying attention. So either you're doing both tasks, doing a mediocre or average job with either tasks, or you're doing a great job on one task and you're totally messing up the other one. So it is literally impossible to focus on two things at once. Kind of like the same thing with kind of a mindset or perspective. If you're focused on something negative, it's impossible to focus on something positive. So if you're focused on the flip side, if you're focused on something positive, then it's impossible to focus on something that's negative. So keep that in mind that if you can try to keep your one thing that you want to focus on in the forefront of your mind, that is what will get most of your attention and hopefully have the best outcomes.

So I want to give you a technique, and this is a quick technique. It's easy to use. Okay. It's called star and star means to stop think, act and review. You have the S T a R star. And so what you want to do in order to maintain your focus or refocus yourself after you've been distracted is to first stop. And then you're going to think about whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish, what the task at hand is and what you're trying to accomplish. And then during the thinking stage, you're also going to think about the plan or the strategy that you need to use to do your next action. Okay? So you're going to stop and think, and then you're going to act. And then after you take your action steps, you want to review to see if you were able to get the desired outcomes.

And if you were not able to reach the desired outcomes, then you want to go back and think about your strategy again, and make sure that the strategies that you had in place were effective in order to the outcomes that you, that you want as. So you're going to tweak this area here, as far as the actions, if you're ending up not getting the results that you want. So star, you're going to stop. You're going to pause. You're going to focus attention on the task at hand. You're going to think about what it is to be done. You're going to plan your actions and decide what to do. If the unexpected occurs, that's a good point because we all know that things are going to come up to distract us. And so when you have something unexpected, if you've already thought about it ahead of time, then you, you kind of know how to either avoid those distractions in the first place, such as turn off your email, turn off your Facebook, turn off your phone while you're completing a specific task and you won't be interrupted.

But then also you may, if you know that you have children, then you might wait until after your children are in bed. So that, that distraction is not a possibility. Okay? So if you, if you think about the unexpected or the things that could happen as well, then you're able to have a plan that might eliminate some of those distractions from happening acting is that you're going to carry out the plan task. And then the review is when you're going to verify whether or not you've got the results that you wanted. Okay? So remember guys, couple things, you can only focus on one thing at a time, if you want to be the best at what you're doing, or if you want to get the best outcomes, then focus on that one thing at a time. Stop, think about what you have to do, devise inappropriate plan, and then act on that plan and then review that plan and make sure that you got the outcomes that you desired.

I hope that tool or resource of star was helpful and don't beat yourself up. We're women. We're always wearing lots of different hats and we're having to multitask a lot of the times. So I think again, the point here is, is to just focus on what you can do to be intentional, to try to focus on important tasks in a single way, important tasks, such as when you are spending time with your kids, or when you're spending time with your husband, trying to eliminate the other distractions so that they really feel like they're important when you're having to complete important tasks. Maybe you sit down and you pay the bills, or maybe you are working from home and you have certain things that you have to do for your business. Maybe you are on the job and you have tons of things on your to-do list, organizing that to do lists so that you're able to focus on certain tasks for a certain amount of time.

Maybe you close your door to your office, turn off your ringer on your phone, turn on your voicemail, turn off your email, those kinds of things. So that you're just more intentional so that when you are able to start to work on important or crucial tasks, that you can really focus on that one thing so that you can get it done quickly. You can get done much more quickly if you're focused on it for a certain amount of time versus having lots of distractions coming in. So it's about being intentional and setting yourself up to be more successful. So hope this was helpful if it was I'd love for you to share this episode with some of your sisters so that they can have a quick tool, that they might be able to put in their tool belt to use any time that they need to.

Okay. Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to my podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women, just like us, your five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some luck. Thanks so much. And I'll see him the next episode. And remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back. 

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EP 23 Live Clarity Coaching Call with Stef Gass: How to Gain Clarity on your Calling When You Don't Know What Steps to Take Next- Sneak Peak How to Create Pillars for Podcast

BONUS EPISODE!
EP 23 Live Clarity Coaching Call with Stef Gass: How to Gain Clarity on your Calling When You Don't Know What Steps to Take Next- Sneak Peak How to Create Pillars for Podcast

And today I am jamming with my client and my friend, Angie Tonini-Rogers from the Wholly Made Life™ podcast. And we are doing a full on podcast strategy session in today's call. So this, this is for you. If you just are searching for some clarity or you have clarity, but you don't understand how that clarity translate into a podcast. This episode is for you.

Have you ever wanted to start your own podcast? 

Take a look at Stefanie Gass' HOW TO PODCAST COURSE right HERE!
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Need Coaching to create the Intentional Life your deserve?
Email me at angietoninirogers@gmail.com

 

Hey, what's up sisters. I am so excited for today's episode because I have a special recording for you. This is an audio of an actual coaching call that I did with my friend, Stephanie Gass. She owns the Mompreneur Mastermind Show. She is amazing at what she does. And she is the one that helped me create the logistics to get the Wholly Made Life™ podcast up and running. So if you've ever wondered, how did I come up with this idea? I had a whole bunch of jumbled ideas and she helped me get this thing up and running and all the things. So I am so excited to let you get a sneak peek and how I created, how Wholly Made Life™ came to be. I'm so excited.

Stef Gass: What's up sister.

And today I am jamming with my client and my friend, Angie Tonini-Rogers from the Wholly Made Life™ podcast. And we are doing a full on podcast strategy session in today's call. So this, this is for you. If you just are searching for some clarity or you have clarity, but you don't understand how that clarity translate into a podcast. This episode is for you. Cause we really take her direction, which she totally has. And we plug all the pieces together for her so that she has a TA, a tagline, a title pillars episodes for the show, a vision for how this podcast is going to touch other women's lives, how it's going to help them inspire them be, be a gift of service that Angie's going to show up for. And when she does that and shows up for them with this podcast, then she's able to figure out what the solutions are that her person needs and create a course or coaching program from it, which is exactly why she is now inside of podcast to profit as well. So I hope you guys enjoy this episode, so let's get it.

Welcome back to the mompreneur mastermind show, where we choose to run insanely successful, passive income businesses that light us up while consuming iced coffee, braless and flawless, and maybe breaking it down to some gangster rap while our kids aren't looking. Did we just become best friends? Yes. Yes we did. Hey, I'm Stephanie gas. Six-Figure corporate exec turned top 1% network marketer turn podcaster. I believe when we let God light our path, we experience true miracles. Welcome sister. Let's get pumped up for today's show. All right. All right. So before we get into this strategy session with Angie, you might be wondering how Steph do I snag myself one of these 30 minute coaching calls. Like I need me a boom shakalaka strategy call. You know what I mean? So this is something that you have access to as a Stephanie gas student. So awesome. Here's your great news.

If you are registered in clarify your calling or podcast pro university, you get access to 30 minute strategy calls with me where we can jam out basically any of this stuff, your strategy for your show, I'm putting together any missing pieces in your clarity work. Like I'm here to support you and to bring all the pieces full circle. And you guys have heard me do enough of these coaching episodes at this point to know that I don't mess around like 30 minutes, we are getting it done. So if you are a Stephanie gas student inside of clarify your calling or podcast pro university, you can email us support@stephaniegas.com and you can grab a 30 minute call. Yeah, I'm so here for it. Now, if you are not a Stephanie gas student in one of my two main courses, or you don't really want to do the course option, you want coaching.

That is still an option for you guys while I am taking fewer clients, I am still taking clients, but so if you want to grab a breakthrough call with me, this is your year girl. Cause I'm not sure how long I will be offering one-on-one coaching. So if that's something that's on your heart, head over to support@stephaniegass.com and email Nina me mail. Nina will email you our coaching menu and you can see what might work best for you. I'm here to support you. I can't wait to work with you. Hey, where there's a will. There's a way I believe that if you've been called to say yes to any of this, that the doors will open for you and that you will figure out a way to make that happen. Also that when God opens doors for you, he provides a way for you to walk in what he's calling you to do. So it's basically raising your hand. Yes, I'm doing that, praying for it. Getting resourceful and making it happen. So I'm here for you. Let us know what you need and enjoy today's episode.

HI Angie, I'm so excited. It's so fun. I'm so excited to work out the podcast kinks girl. So start me off with like, where are you at with it? I read your notes. Just curious if you already have like the vision for what's inside of it and what really you want to get done because 30 minutes goes fast.

Angie Tonini-Rogers: okay, well I haven't started it yet. I think I'm just looking for clarity on what am I taught? You know, what order, the things that I talk about it, there's a lot of things I'm good at, but what, you know, what do I talk about? How do I organize the episodes and that kind of thing. So I just think, I just need some of that clarity and maybe the clarity with who I'm talking to and what I'm talking about. That'll help me.

Stefanie Gass: Good. So yeah, let's start with the podcast pillars, cause that's really what you're going to stand on. What are those things you're going to talk about on your show? And then that then allows us to back into the little other stuff cause we have to have, what is it first? Yeah. Talk to me a little bit about your vision for that. Like, yes, you're good at a lot of things, but when you think about what do you really want to talk about and how do you really want to serve? What do you think those topics are? Like, what are those giftings that you have when it comes to others?

Angie Tonini-Rogers: I think leadership and the way that I lead with love that's huge. That's a lot of what I focus on. That's how I think everything else comes from love. So that's how I teach people how to lead.

So leadership is something I'm good at. And so that's definitely, their faith is huge. Part of that becoming who it is that you're called to be. How do you, you know, how do you listen for that? How do you get confirmation for that, that kind of thing? I am, I've been in corporate or healthcare for years and so I have like perfectionism and people pleasing and not feeling like you're enough and you're trying to do all the things you're given all of your stuff to the career. So just getting women to understand that it's okay to focus on your family and your career or it it's okay to leave your career. I mean, I've just recently taken a huge step of faith

Crazy and awesome. So but you know, so, so really stepping into who it is you're called to be and, and trying to figure that out and understand that that's a journey and being bold and courageous and, and doing some of those things. I'm a boy mom, so I love all things, boy, mom themes. Yeah. And those are my major things that I know.

Stefanie Gass: So when we look at those four things that you just said to me, the first one was leadership. Okay. And then we, we've got to uncover like, okay, well then who is this for? And what kind of leadership? Cause there's lots of different types. Second one was faith and really partnering with God on what God wants for your life and leaning into all of that trust and those types of things. The third one was being bold, having courage and taking action. And then the fourth one was motherhood. So if those are your four pillars, who is this person we're talking to? And obviously I think it's a mom based on our mother had tiller. Right. Is she though when it comes to that leadership part, what are we doing in that bucket? Is that leading in her life? And like, are we going to leave the corporate and the, and the business stuff out of this podcast?

Angie Tonini-Rogers: Yeah. I think it's being able to find fulfillment outside of your career. Because for me, I'm on the journey where my identity was in. I'm a chief nursing officer and that's what I do, you know? And so when you strip that away, okay, what are you, who are you? And what do you do and how do you serve? So I'd like to help people. And of course I'm walking that path right now too, but I think it's finding that balance outside of the career. Yes. You're great at that. But then you've got all that guilt of using all that you got at work and not having thing left with your husband, for your husband and your kids.

Stefanie Gass: Yeah. So when you think of the woman though, so she's, I think she's a working mom or a corporate woman who maybe has a lot of success or has the titles, or has the money, the salary. Right. But she's seeking to plug in some boundaries like she's ready. So maybe it's not even the leadership part. Maybe it's the, Hey, let's take what we're good at at work of our boundaries of our listening to our employees. Like we joke in my family sometimes I'm like, don't treat me worse than you treat your employees. Right. Cause they go good. Do we treat our family that way?

Exactly. Yes. Maybe teaching

Her how to pull in boundaries and leadership and listening, respect all those things that she does in her job, into her motherhood and relationship with Christ. So when I, when I looked at this, I'm like, okay, maybe it's working moms who are seeking for more fulfillment outside of her career or work she wants to, she wants to grow in her motherhood and in her purposes outside of work.

Angie Tonini-Rogers: Yeah. I definitely, because I don't know if it's necessarily someone who needs to leave their career. Certainly I can talk through that, but it is about, for me about why, what am I doing, spending all these hours and all of these on-call and I'm never available, you know, in all of my good stuff, goes to the people that I love at work, you know? And then my husband and my kids get the, you know, the crappy end of the deal and myself too. That's the other huge thing is that I come way less. Like I completely let myself go. So I think getting back to loving yourself and not feeling guilty about that. And that's a journey that I am on every day.

Stefanie Gass: Exactly. So if we were to think of like a tagline here, so if your, if your pillars are this like boundaries and leadership bucket one, that means you get to talk about all of those things. Pillar two is faith. Pillar three is the taking action and doing hard things because when you decide to have every area of your life be great, instead of one, that's really hard, right? We've gotten communication that has to happen. We've got to lay things down. We have to even sometimes go part time or even leave the career or go, go start a job. Maybe that's the thing. So like you're just helping this mom figure out how to make all areas of her life. Great. Instead of one and the other one is motherhood. So when we think of the tagline, if those are the four things you're going to talk about and we go up one rung in the ladder, it's now what's the promise? Like, what is this thing that we're giving her? What is this podcast? Like? Something like finding meaning, purpose time and boundaries. If I say like in all areas of her life, it sounds too like, where like, well, what does that mean? So it's almost like define it, like finding meaning, purpose times and boundaries in motherhood, faith and marriage in life with purpose. We could say finding meaning time and boundaries in a faith, fueled life with purpose.

Angie: Yeah. I like the motherhood, faith, marriage. I like those words. Okay. I love purpose because I think that's what we're all striving for is what, what are we doing? What's our purpose. Yeah.

Stef: So maybe it's even like claiming a faith, fueled life with purpose.

Angie: I like claiming cause that's good action word. And it's like, you're taking it back almost.

Stef: Yeah. Yeah. Like, so here's where I'm at. I've got cutting it down, trying to get it clean and short. So far I'm at claiming faith, courageous action and fulfillment in motherhood, marriage and mindset.

Angie: Yeah. I like it. Okay.

Stef: So that's the tagline of like, well, what is this thing? Right. Like, okay, I'm going to land on this podcast. And our next question is what's the name of it? And

Then that looks and cleans it up for her. She's Like, Oh yeah, I want to have faith and take action. And fulfillment in my mother had married in mindset and why this is so good is we didn't say business. We didn't even say the word purpose because then we get all into the business. Like I think this is like this woman who wants, you know what, no, I want the courageous action and fulfillment in these three buckets over here.

Angie: Sometimes talk about what, what she's doing in her work or in her purpose or in her job, get back to why it matters in her mother had marriage in mind. Okay. Right. Does that make sense? Okay. Yeah. Cause I think that this woman feels confident in their career already and that's yeah.

Stef: Okay. So what's our, what are we calling this thing? Huh? Did you have any ideas?

Angie: I don't have any ideas. I, I like let's see. This is where my my creativeness just kind of goes out. I don't know if there's a rediscover or becoming

Stef: It's really, you know, for this mom, so we could have mom in the title or we can really focus on the fact that she's kind of finding this fulfillment and joy. Like maybe it's the claiming that you love so much, right? Like, like claiming courage, like claiming courage to not be everything in your job, claiming courage to set up the boundaries, claiming courage to get into that intimacy with God. So claiming courage could be a fun theme and a great name. I have no idea if that's available, we have to go look, I'm claiming. Cause what else is she claiming? She's claiming courage. She's claiming. And I love alliteration. So I mean, I think she's going to, she needs to find her joy again. She needs to find her confidence and competence outside of work. And I think that that's, you know, you don't feel like you're enough with mom with being a mom and with your husband and all of that. Because you don't have enough and you feel guilty about not having enough after work. So, well, What about, I don't know what this was like, pretty clear just now I just had this vision of like, what if it's like this whole life project, like whole life, like whole living, like you have this whole you're, you're only experiencing a pie, a piece of the pie. What if you could experience your whole life? What if your whole life there are eight different buckets or something and podcast is going to teach you how to step into claiming faith boundaries, fulfillment so that you can have the whole life.

Angie: I like it. I like it. Yeah. I like, because nursing is such a holistic view to where you're touching all areas of the person's life to make them whole in their mind, body, spirit, emotions. Yeah. And finances. Yeah. I like it.

Stef: Okay. So there's whole life, whole living. There's like whole her whole her. Is that a weird, they whole, her whole, her whole,

If you don't have the L then

Yeah, I liked, I liked like the whole life project and like, you know, the whole life project. Holy Holy made. Woo. That's kind of fun. So it's a play on words, but like, obviously you're Holy made like you are living with the Holy spirit within you. That's kind of a thing. Yeah.

That's kind of fun. Holy made even spell wholly wrong. W H w H

I have wholly be like caps or something. That's pretty fun. Yeah. That's kind of neat. Whole, whole circle of your life. And then also like you are Holy made. Like, are you living in potential as a mom, as a, as a wife and not just your title or not just your income or what, what are you idolizing that needs to be put down so that you can live your whole life?

Angie: Yeah, I like that. I like it.

Okay. So we have Holy made H O L Y made, or we can spell it. Holy Holy. Like with the w

I spell it and tell you H O L L Y, but it doesn't look right, but that's not what,

Who knows. Let me Google it wholly. W H O L L Y.

Is that right? It looks super weird. It does paper

So weird. Now what's really though, let's see, is wholly made with an age it's only four grand, four grand wholly made with a w w H O L Y. But they're going to think you just spelled it wrong. So we can't do that. Holy made regular spelling taken. How about Holy made podcast.com because we know it's not trademark because, well, we don't know that for sure. But the.com is not it's available. They just know it's so good that they are selling it at a premium. So wholly made podcast.com is available and you could just use fully made as your brand. And just know that when you start rolling in the dough, you grabbed that 4k domain, like literally spelling it wholly H O L Y

O H O L Y. Yep.

Wholly made. And then we can plug wholly with the H into the tagline, like claiming faith, courageous action, and fulfillment to be Holy made. W H O w H O L L Y in motherhood, marriage and mindset.

Yeah. I definitely liked the Holy made.

That's so good. You got to use it. I'm telling you that. It's so good. And I love the play on words there.

I love the connection too, with the nursing, since obviously that's I know that holistic approach

You got literally holistic, which plays off of your Holy you've got Holy made with the pie that she's living in this bucket with different pieces that make her whole spirit, Holy, like God and faith and spirit being like it's so good because it hits all of your three buckets. Yeah,

It does. It's good.

Stef: All right. Are we good with that part? Yeah. Okay, perfect. So let's keep digging in. Okay. All right. We've got Holy made is your show. We've got a tagline claiming faith, courageous action, and fulfillment in motherhood, marriage and mindset. If you want to add that to be Holy made in, you can. But I just think that makes it too long. I think we should just say, okay, we got our pillars. So what you're going to talk about in here are your boundaries, leadership, listening, respect, bucket, your faith bucket, you're taking action and courage bucket, and then your pies. I think this motherhood family thing is actually the pies that cause you can talk about, like you said, what makes up the whole circle of her life? Well, we've got motherhood. We got family. We have financial, you can paint this picture of the whole life project that could even be your program. The whole life comes full circle. Okay. So then

Angie: Yes. Okay. I like the whole life project too.

Stef: Yes, me too. So, cause your next question for me was like, how do I monetize this ASAP? Right. Well,

Yeah, of course. You know, cause I'm taking that step of faith, you know? So obviously I know it takes time and all that stuff, but you know, ideas on, I know there's content. I just don't know how to put it together. And then obviously I know there's affiliate and all that kind of stuff too initially. Yeah. That's what you teach.

So when we look at this woman, what do we think her pain point is?

Angie: I think it's being burnt out on doing everything for work and not, and feeling so guilty and shame, you know, all that guilt and shame and, and worry and anxiety over. Not fulfilling her role as a mom, as a wife, as a, maybe a servant vendor, church, maybe her health. I think she's, you know, lets herself go. I mean, I'm talking to me. Okay. So…

Stef: Stressing about that. When we say those are our biggest pain points, what does she really want? She wants the whole life again. The whole thing. Yeah. I'm really tired of living one piece of this pie.

Yes. I'm done with It. That piece of the pie is getting back in its place and I'm getting the full pie back out and I'm going to pour into here and here and here and here, like right.

Angie: Givin me chills. Yes. That's exactly right. Like I'm done with that being my life. That is, that's been my life leadership and healthcare or corporate world or whatever that becomes your life. And then everything else falls.

Stef: I wonder if we should rework your tagline, I'm going back to that for a second. Cause it's like maybe what it is is what is it? What is it? So we go, Holy made it is like spirit restoration and it's something like spirit restoration and reclaiming your whole life. And it's spelled, you know, whole life for the burnt out working mama or something like, because really when we're talking about like, well what is this? This is like, let's reclaim your whole life. Yeah. Tired with living a one piece of your life. Well living the other nine pieces of your life. Well too.

Angie: Yes. That's so good. And that's exactly it like because yes, it's wellness. It's emotional stability is all of it. Yeah. I mean it's the whole, it's the whole pie and you're living the career one. Great and finances. Great. But for what you're giving for, what? Because the rest of your life has not been benefiting from that great salary that you have.

Stef: Yeah. Okay. Something like reclaim your whole life and tap into God's size fulfillment. This is the whole podcast. Can I get an amen?

Angie: Hmmmm. Wow. So good. Yes. Reclaim your whole life and tap into your God-sized fulfillment. And what did you say? That's it? What did you say after that?

Stef: Reclaim your whole life and tap into God's size fulfillment. Now we can say who it's for, but I don't think we should say it in the tagline. Let's pull that into the description. Okay. Okay. So let me try and give you a description. Okay. Hey mama, welcome to wholly made where I believe you are not created in this life to do one thing. Well, you are not your job, your title, your salary, just a mother or just a wife. You are actually made up of a bucket of things that create your whole life different pieces of the pie that create a complete circle that God is trying to show you. If you're ready to stop ignoring different pieces of your pie and reclaim your whole life and tap into the life that God has for you to experience God's size fulfillment, then sister, you are in the right place together. We are going to walk through some boundaries, leadership, different areas of your life that need to change. It's going to be some tough work up in here, girl, but then we're going to uncover some bold courageous actions that we can take to experience. Not just the good life, but the whole life. Yeah.

Angie: Yes. Oh my goodness. That's so good. I would listen because that's me. I think my gosh,

Stef: Like this so much as you've niched in now to the woman who is so unbalanced and really good at the one thing, which I really think of myself, you know, eight years ago and I'm like, wow, it was really great at work. I was really great at network marketing and my life was grumbling. Right? And now I'm going, I'm now living the whole life. The Holy Holy made I'm living the whole life. Holy made. That's how you ask, are you ready to live your whole life? Holy made. Let's go.

Angie: Yes. That's yeah. It's great. It's so good.

Stef: The question, which I'll try to at least give you a direction would be what happens on this. And I think if I was to, I think, I think where you can go with this is you can create the course, right? Which is the whole life project and what it is is it's walking her through boundaries, fulfillment maybe time-blocking uncovering purpose and just some basics in each area of the pie. So you're going to have to identify what are these areas of the pie. There's obviously inner work. So their self, their spiritual with God, there's her marriage. There is her motherhood. There is her home. There is her health. There are also relationships like maybe you can come up with each module is a bucket, a piece of the pie. And you're just going through how to be your best you in that one pie and not perfect and not amazing, but like how do you get 1% better in each area of your pie?

And how do you identify which, which areas of the pie are really like lacking and which ones are overflowing. Cause you want to balance it out. How to balance her pie to live her whole life. I think that in course I do, they might want to do it group coaching style so that you have like 10 women together, instead of it being fully passive, you can play with it. Like, what I like to do is I launch something live the first time a to see does it light me up to do this live? And if not, well, now I've recorded everything and I have a course. Okay.

Angie: Right. Yeah. I like it. That's good. And you know, it's funny as I use a training and I talk about the P hat, making sure you have all the pieces of the pie and all of that stuff.

Stef: So yeah. I'm serious. It's kind of crazy. Actually. I'm thinking about it. I'm like, okay, he's got jokes, you know, he's like, Oh my God. Bringing it back to the pie today. Oh my gosh. All right. Well, and it's good after the dreamer summit too. Cause that they talked about that pie, that pie as well. And that's just kind of a, that visualization that I get of like, and it can be whatever can be the buckets. It could be the, the, the box that has the like what, but the point is you're, you're this one thing that God created you to be. And there's pieces of that. And you're ignoring half of it, which doesn't light up your soul because you only focusing on the one or two and this woman is specifically and you're going to help her break free from that. Yeah. Yeah. I love it. And you believe it in 30 minutes, look at us. Go. Yeah, it is. It's very mean you have such a gift. So I just love, I just love listening to you. He has such a gift.

Stef: How incredible was that conversation and how excited are you guys to go check out Angie's new podcast. Holly made life. It is so awesome. I know y'all are going to love it. So I just pray over you now, sister, friends, that wherever you sit, you will find yourself encouraged. You find yourself growing in confidence that you too can step out in faith to pursue the purpose that God has for you. I pray that you walk into clarity that God gives you new eyes to see new ears, to hear and pours into you. The belief that you can, that you can impact others, that you can use your voice to help inspire people. And that all you need to do it are your experiences are the tests that become the testimonies are the mess. That becomes the message. And that God will reveal that to you in a big, incredible way.

And just pour into you that belief that you are here to do big things for the kingdom in Jesus name. I pray, amen sisters. I told you guys, she is amazing. She's a good friend and she is my coach. And I just wanted to give you guys the opportunity to see how it is that I had this idea. I had this calling and she helped me gain some clarity. So I highly recommend if you need clarity in your calling, she has a free Facebook group that you can get on over just search mompreneur mastermind show. And she has some free content in there that is about clarity on your calling, finding that clarity on your calling. So I highly recommend her for that. She has a God-given gift, as you can see, she took all my jumbled up ideas and she helped me make a reality out of that and, and helped me clarify enough to where I could focus.

Angie: And wallah here is Wholly Made Life™. In a few of you guys have asked questions about how do you start a podcast? How do you record? What do you use to edit and all of these things? Well, I am not the expert in that I have learned, and I am learning as I go, but I am telling you, I learned everything that I needed to know from Stephanie gas. And that is who you just heard coaching me. So not only is she an amazing God gifted clarity coach, but she helps people start podcasts and from step a, all the way to Z plus a lot of God and Holy spirit in the middle of it. So if you want to take a look at what her course is, how it teaches you, how to start your own podcast, then go to http://ppu.atrogers

And that will lead you right to her course. And she will help you get started. I promise you will not have any questions left once you take her course. It's amazing. I was able to get this podcast up and running in less than two weeks of taking her course. So, and it was an idea that I'd had for a little bit of time, but the logistics were bam. Bam. Thank you. Ma'am okay. She's got everything you need to know in that course. http://ppu.atrogers. If you have any inkling that you might want to start a podcast. Okay. And I just threw that in there. Cause I know some of you guys have emailed me or, or messaged me and asked me, how do you start a podcast? Or what platform do you use, etc. And everything that I've done is exactly how she taught me. So I want to give her the credit for that. All right, guys, I will see you guys on the next tech next episode. And I love you guys. Stay warm, stay healthy.

Hey, before you go, I'd love for you to hop over to the podcast and give me a review. And you know, I'd love five stars. That's how we can share this thing with other women just like us. You're five stars and written review really helps me get the word out. You can also take a screenshot of this episode and tag me in your Insta and Facebook stories. And I'll give you a shout out right back, leaving a review and sharing this episode is the best way you can show me some left. Thanks so much. And I'll see in the next episode, and remember your smile is like a boomerang, throw one at somebody and it'll come right back.

 

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EP 22 Feeling Stuck and Unsure How to Move Forward- 7 Simple Step System to Get UNSTUCK for Overwhelmed Moms. Grab an Intentional Life coaching session if you are stuck

EP 22 Feeling Stuck and Unsure How to Move Forward- 7 Simple Step System to Get Unstuck for Overwhelmed Moms

Are you feeling so stuck that you're unsure of how to move forward? Well, today we're going to talk about the system for overwhelmed moms and how we can work on getting stuck. So let's get ready and let's get unstuck.

Podcast: http://bit.ly/whollymadelifepodcast

IG: @angietoninirogers

Community: http://bit.ly/whollymadelifefbgroup

 

Angie’s Coaching Menu: Email: angietoninirogers@gmail.com

 

Wholly Made Life™ Short Assessment: http://bit.ly/shortassessment

Podcast Episode Updates: https://angie.gr8.com/

Interested in learning how to start your own podcast? Take a look at this course to learn everything you need to know! Ppu.atrogers.com

Welcome back to episode 22. And today we're going to talk about something really fun or maybe not, but I think it's, it's fun if we can just get it, but it's about feeling stuck. And are you feeling so stuck that you're unsure of how to move forward? Well, today we're going to talk about the system for overwhelmed moms and how we can work on getting stuck. So let's get ready and let's get unstuck.

Welcome back to this episode of Wholly Made Life™. And before we get started, I have some openings for some coaching sessions, a half hour sessions and a couple of one hour sessions. But at any point, if you are interested in finding out more about doing an individual coaching session with me, you can email me at angietoninirogers@gmail.com. Or you can find me on Facebook or Instagram at Angie Tonini Rogers. All right, well, let's get into it today. So we're going to talk about feeling stuck. I know if you are anything like me at one point or another, you have felt stuck or maybe it is showing up as overwhelm or, being burnt out. And this happens a lot in the mental health, behavioral health world, with the nurses that I work with or in nursing in general. And I know it happens in the corporate world.

I know it happens with mamas who have full-time jobs or own businesses, and it can pretty much happen with anyone anywhere time, but it is a place where we just feel like things are not going well. And it feels like things are piling up and we do not know what to do, where to go. And the thing about being burned out or in this place of overwhelm or feeling stuck is that no matter what you do, you feel like you get deeper and deeper. And the other thing it does is I feel like it puts these glasses on that are shaded with overwhelm or shaded with being burnt out or shaded with feeling stuck. So it's like we're looking through the lenses that change the world that we see because we're coming from a place of overwhelm being burnt out or feeling stuck. And I always talked to the nurses or the staff that I have about when they are feeling this way and reminding them that, you know, sometimes we're in a place of burnout or overwhelm or feeling stuck and we can do some things to come back from that.

There's a point where we can make some changes. We can do some things and start to look through a lens that lets us see the world from a better perspective. Because when you are seeing the world through burnout, you tend to respond differently. You receive information differently, you perceive information differently. You perceive conversations differently. You attach meaning to things sometimes that if you weren't burnt out, or if you weren't overwhelmed, you would not normally attach that definition or attach those emotions to that instant that just happened. Or that moment that just happened. But because you've got these glasses on that you're seeing the world through burnout. You don't even realize sometimes that your emotions of being burnt out or tired or overwhelmed or just stuck are tainting the circumstances in which you're in. So other people around you may not be seeing it that way because they're not coming from this burnt out place.

It's like this concept called the mood elevator. And it's a concept where the lower you are on the elevator, the worse you perceive and receive and the worse it is to handle situations. Whereas if you're at the top of the elevator where you are, um, very happy and you are in a great mood, you've gotten enough sleep. You are seeing things through rosy glasses. Um, you are able to handle things differently. So I, for an example of this is like, if I am super tired, let's say I could not sleep at all last night. And my kids are bickering back and forth and I snap and I just say, stop it that's enough. Um, that might be a different response. Yeah. If I had gotten a really good night's sleep and I wasn't so impatient or short, okay. I might just be like, boys, please that's enough.

And instead of snapping and yelling or screaming or arguing, or sending them to your rent, their rooms or whatever it may be. Okay. So it's just important to realize that sometimes we're in a place and we don't realize we are seeing the world through glasses, you know, uh, there are times that I forget I have my glasses on. And so when I lay down and I feel my glasses on my face, I'm like, Oh my gosh, I have my glasses on and just take them off. It's kinda like the mask right now where sometimes I forget, I get out of my car and I forget that I don't have my mask on. So I'll walk all the way up to the door. And then I see someone else with their mask and I'm like, Oh man, I got to go back to my car and get my mask because I don't even feel it anymore.

So it's this thing that we become used to because it's how we're receiving information all of the time. So if we get into a place where we are burnt out or stuck in something, sometimes we don't even realize we're stuck and we need the people around us to love us enough to say, you know, why don't we think about how you're perceiving, what just happened? Because I have a different perception of what just happened. Uh, and it's might be because I'm in a different place. Okay. So we're going to talk about the system for getting ourselves unstuck. So back to the being burnt out. So there, sometimes there's a point where you can come back from that. You can change some things and come back other times, there's a point where you have to actually do something to change your circumstance or change your environment because you're at a place where, you know, you're not going to come back from that burnout, or you're not going to come back from that overwhelm as long as nothing changes, you know, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

So let's talk about this system for getting unstuck and then we'll move from there. All right. So the unstuck, we're going to look at this as spelling out unstuck. So U N S T U C K.

U=Understanding

N=  Nurture & No

S= Sufficient

T= Time

U= Upbeat

C= Courage

K= Kindness

So the first letter U is for understanding:  the number one thing you need to do is understand what it is you're facing. Understand, become aware, that there could be a problem. If you are getting repetitive, negative responses and emotions to situations happening, then you might have an issue going on that you need to take a careful look at. You need to get a better understanding of what's going on and why it is that you're receiving or perceiving information this way. Okay? So the first step is to understand and gain awareness of what's going on. The second thing is in, and that is going to be nurture. And you're going to get a double whammy for this, this letter.

It's going to be nurture and it's going to be no. So the second letter in nurture, what this means is that once you gain an understanding, you want to nurture this situation. That means that maybe it is that you need to nurture yourself. Maybe it is that you are so stressed out so overwhelmed that you are running yourself at all ends of the candle, and you cannot get any time to take care of yourself. So maybe it is that you need to nurture yourself. Maybe you need to get some more sleep. Maybe you need to get some more nourishment for your body, for your mind, for your emotions, for your spirit. Maybe you need to add some things into your daily routine in order to nurture yourself so that you can receive and perceive things in a different way. Okay? Once you've got that acknowledgement and understanding of what's happening, then you need to see what you can do differently about that situation.

The second N in this is no, maybe it is that you are taking on too much and you are saying yes, too much. There is a place for no. So sometimes part of that, nurturing yourself or nurturing the situation is going to be, to say no more often. And it is okay to say no, especially when you're at a place where you are feeling so overwhelmed, so burnt out. So stress out and just stuck in a situation. Sometimes there is a place for you to say no. Okay. The next letter is S as in stuck. Okay. So the S stands for sufficient. So we've understood what the problem is. Now we have decided on how we can nurture ourselves or the situation. And we have deciphered what we need to say no to, and what we need to say yes to. And now you need to know that you have, you are sufficient.

You have been equipped with everything that you need, and you are surrounded by the people that you need to help you make this happen to help you get yourself unstuck, okay? You have everything that you need. You are sufficient, you are enough, and your God is sufficient. He has equipped you with everything that you need to make this happen. The next letter is T and this stands for time. You are going to pay attention to the time that you are spending in all the areas of your life, because sometimes we get so burnt out. So overwhelmed, so stressed out because we are spending way too much time doing one thing and not enough time doing things that light us up, things that bring us joy, three things that spark joy in our lives. So for me, for my example, uh, it, there are, I am so prone to letting my career, my business, my, uh, daily methods of operation take over.

So there are times that I could sit on the computer, working on different things from the moment I get up until two or three in the morning. And I, if I am not purposeful and intentional about my time, then I end up spending two, three, four days, you know, either working 80, I ended up working 80 hours a week, or I, uh, don't, I realize a whole week goes by and I haven't spent any intentional time with my kids or with my husband, or I'm always thinking that I'm running out of time. I don't have enough time. So you've got to be very intentional with the time that you have and make sure that you are blocking the time that you want to get the results that you want. Okay? The less intentional you are with your time, the more stuck you're going to feel.

All right, the next letter is you again. And this one is going to be up beat. And because there is no P for positivity, uh, I used up beat here. It is so important. I think that we recognize then when we are feeling stuck, when we are feeling burnt out and overwhelmed, our emotions start to lie to us about, uh, everything that's happening around us, the emotions that tell us and give us information that we create thoughts around and then actions and behaviors and words around sometimes are not the truth. So we need to make sure that we are surrounding ourselves with people that are not corroborating our story, that everything is negative and our circumstances suck. And we can't, uh, get enough time to do what we want to do. We want to surround ourselves with who are more positive or upbeat about the outcomes, more upbeat about our lives, ways that we can, uh, look at the glass half full instead of half empty.

You've got to have some of those people in your life. You know, it is very true about who you hang around is who you become. So you've got to be real careful that the people that you're talking to are not only people that are corroborating this story that helps you feel stuck and burnt out and overwhelmed and stressed type. This is a very cultural, collaborative, communicative thing that happens. So if you are upbeat, if you are looking at, you know, we talked about these affirmations of who God says you are. And we've talked about waking up in the morning and repeating, you know, five to seven affirmations that we know that God says about us. If we do that every single morning, before our feet hit the floor, if we do that throughout the day, as soon as that emotion comes up, Oh my gosh, here she goes again, this situation is horrible.

Here, there it goes. My boss again, uh, you know, thinking that I can do everything. Um, as soon as we get that, that starting to happen, we can see, start to repeat some of those affirmations in our head and say, you know what, no, I am the head and not the tail. I am victorious. I am an overcomer. I am a conqueror. I am equipped. I am sufficient. His grace is sufficient. Uh, you know, whatever those words are that help you get the emotions flipped from this is devastating. This is horrible to you. No, no, I can do this. I can, uh, walk with my head up and I can walk in ready to be victorious, whatever you need to do to flip that switch, to get those emotions and those thoughts to be congruent with that instead of the feeling stuck. That's what I'm talking about here with the upbeat, the next one is C and this one is courage.

And the reason I chose courage is because it takes courage. I think when your circumstances seem to be, um, keeping you stuck or bound, you need courage to make. So some of these decisions, it takes courage to take the time, to understand and acknowledge what is going on. It takes time. I'm sorry. It takes courage to say, no, I'm not going to do that because I've got enough on my plate right now. And I am already way overworked in this area. And I am missing out on this other area. It takes courage for that. It takes courage to remind that you are equipped for what's coming to you. Okay? It takes courage to set the time and be intentional so that you are in control of your time and not allowing everyone else to be in control of your time. Okay? It takes courage to speak words over yourself that are upbeat and positive when you don't really feel like your situation is showing up that way.

And then finally, the last one is K, and this is kindness. This is being kind, being loving and just remembering to serve other people, be kind, pay it forward because the reality is is that we are called to pay it forward. We are called to serve others. We are called to love. We are called to show kindness to others, no matter what the circumstance is, you know that saying, kill them with kindness. This is what we're talking about here. We want to be kind to others and to ourselves. I think when you get in a place where you've made some mistakes, maybe you are feeling burnt out. You're feeling stuck. And so you've responded in some ways that have damaged relationships, uh, that have messed up some circumstances. It's time that you acknowledge it. You nurture yourself. You start standing up with courage and saying, no, you understand that you're well equipped.

You start blocking off your time so that you can take that time back and being control of your own time. And you do that by being kind to yourself first, give yourself some grace, give yourself some, um, some forgiveness, because we all get into these ruts. We all get stuck, but I promise you that you can get unstuck no matter what is going on in your life, you can get unstuck. So that's my system for getting unstuck. And yes, it takes a little work. Yes, it takes some attention, but so does everything that's worth, worth getting. So does everything so being unstuck, you understand and nurture and know S sufficient T time you up beat C courage and K kindness. Okay. Are we ready to get unstuck? All right, let's do it. And I hope that you are over in the Facebook group. If you're not go ahead and get over in our Facebook group: Wholly Made Life™